Traveling with a group to Vegas.

For our vow renewal, we covered the set in stone planned meals and of course the reception meal at Alize after our vow renewal. We did the same for both of our 50th birthdays with the set in stone meals that were planned and covered the cabana and tickets for a show. The rest was everyone can do their own thing or meet up as they pleased.

 

We're doing similar for my early 60th this summer in Bend. We're hosting a group soiree on Friday night and folks are a la carte after that.

 

@smerrian
Understood. We are covering food drinks in our suite for the informal renewal. As well as all food/drinks at cabanas the next day. That's it and everyone is aware of this.

They are making their own plans otherwise. Heck some are even arriving 3 days before we get there. I was just contemplating other meal options should they all want to get together another day.

 

IMO...

From my past experience, group trips (over 3+ people) are hard. People get angry and don't agree. But I'm about to go on a big group trip in a few weeks so I know group trips are inevitable.

The best way is to plan one or two key events during the day, maybe a meal and a show or two meals. People will go along for items in between if they want to.

If you want to stay somewhere and everyone else wants to leave, just take an uber/lyft/cab/bus.

If you want to go somewhere and other people dont (ie restaurant is too expensive, place is too far away, they want to go somewhere else), do it!

General comment -- you have to remember it's also your trip.

 

What works for my group of friends, whether we are traveling as couples or just on a guys trip- Vegas or elsewhere:

-don’t overplan, but have some kind of loose itinerary. Breakfast at X, spending midday hours doing Y, dinner then whatever at Z. No biggie if someone is off doing their own thing, & we often deviate from these plans anyway, but at a minimum they’re a fallback so there’s no putzing around wondering “what are we going to do?”

-everyone has a different budget, just be conscientious and transparent.

-Any group activity that requires deposits or prepayment, collect $$ ahead of the trip

 

I think you just have to know how your group travels. There's no one fixed set of rules for all groups. I've been on group trips where everyone follows a pretty set itinerary, I've been on group trips where there are one or two events planned, and many in-betweens.

I think a lot of the point of these threads is that "everyone is doing the same thing at all times" is not the recipe for a good Vegas trip. To me, the rude part is them waiting around. I can't speak for anyone else, but if I were in that position, I wouldn't have minded in the slightest if they were like, "We're going back to the hotel, take a cab back, we'll see you in a bit." It's an extra $20 or so for you; if you want to spend that, it's up to you (assuming you weren't skipping out on some other important event).

 

This exactly. I felt embarrassed that they were not enjoying themselves BUT what made it worse is that I was unaware they wanted to leave.

If they had just told me they wanted to leave I would've told them ok, I'll taxi or uber to where they were heading. It just upset me that they couldn't at least tell me that and made me feel like a selfish self-entitled person that is holding up everyone's else.

PHOF was my idea, I suggested it. All of them seemed to want to check it out also. By the way, I really liked PHOF. It took me a while to check out all the machines before I settled on a set of really old ones that I remember playing in my teens. I played only two machines with my wife when we realized no one of our group was around. Concerned, we looked for them and couldn't find them. When we looked out the entrance they were in the van staring at us.

We were there less than an hour.

Oh well, next time with the group (if there is one) my wife and I will go by ourselves.

 

@Electroguy563 , I commend you for holding your tongue. I would've handled it differently, and not in a good way. I have no tolerance for stupidity and the gang would have baked to death in that car before I came out of the PHOF or until someone actually came up to me and TOLD me that others would like to leave. Then I would say, "Oh. Okay." and leave. Best that all of my trips are solo.

 

When the right time presents itself I plan to openly talk about our group trip together. My BIL was the driver and had the most knowledge and experience on Vegas roadways and I found out that he was the one that got in the van at PHOF and then the others, like lemmings, followed.

I want to tell them that I value their happiness too when on trips like this and that I would have gladly taken alternative transportation if they wanted to do something else. I also plan to tell them how I felt when they did that to me and my wife. I felt like shit.

I also plan to pull my BIL (the driver) to the side privately one day and discuss this with him. It's a habit of his to do things like this when he is not interested as a group. He also has a habit of asserting what he "thinks" is best for the group without really encouraging an open discussion. I say this because prior to doing this trip with the group (our first) my wife and I have done countless trips with just my BIL and his wife (my wife's sister). I kinda figured that his demeanor might cause some problems since my wife and I have encountered many situations like what happened at PHOF.

My wife and I agreed that separate cars would help in future trips.

 

There are three times I've traveled as a group to Vegas.
First time there when there was three of us and we had a blast and did everything together.
Second time was when I got married and there were 6 of us. We would meet at in the casino or in the hallway and go do stuff then go our separate ways as couples.
Third time there was a mix of people and some gambled, some walked, some shopped, etc. We never met at any regular interval but whomever was around when we met up could go with each other to do whatever. A few times a text message asking hey where are you guys and wait for so and so was needed.

Had a blast every single time and we made it work.

 

With this thread, the one today about the whacked brother-in-law ... think about your travel mates, people.

Our travel "groups"are like concentric, expanding rings. The smallest ring is the stalwarts, a very small group going back decades. We have similar likes and expectations and the biggest key is no one sweats a buck. As importantly, all are willing to explore/try things outside the familiar -- mostly meaning food -- though because of who they are there's not a lot of terra incognita left. But the point is, all are flexible and appreciative. Most of the time it's the "golf guys," but spouses are always welcome.

That group over the years has had several other folks come in/out. They come in when we lessen the "burden" on location and cost, but mostly are out -- and they accept it -- because they won't dedicate the extra day or the extra travel requirement, and mostly the extra buck. We're all as BFF as with the smaller group, so other things happen over the course of the year to keep the bonds going.

We more recently -- from our time in our previous town -- made our way into a group that travels like the first but with greater numbers. They've all been doing this for even more decades than my golf group. They are flexible, open-minded and willing to explore, and they go all over. We've been very lucky to have been brought into the fold. We don't participate as often as we'd like -- they're now all mostly retired. They're joining with the Golf Boyz for our summer extravaganza. Everyone is a self-starter so while there will be group things, no one is going to whine about or begrudge not having totally orchestrated hand-holding.

Family -- we're lucky. We all get along. We all like to be together. We try to do visit AOAP, travel together when we can. Guess that's a group.

Then there are what over the years mostly have been mass Vegas get togethers. This is when the rules have to be explicit, mostly with the rule being: Take Care of Thyself, and we'll see anyone interested at A, B and/or C.

 

I love going solo and meeting up with a group. It's my favorite type of trip because I am a very social yet independent person.

We just had 40+ from around the country meet up at Harrah's in Kansas City. The main event was a Super Bowl Party and everyone attended that. Different people planned different things, and opened it up to the group ahead of time and folks signed up for what they wanted to do. Anything that required a deposit or definite commitment meant that money was collected ahead of time so if someone didn't show up it was a non-issue. We had @16 for dinner at Gordon Ramsey, @20 went to lunch at an amazing BBQ place (rental cars and Ubers were used), almost everyone took the Party Bus to another casino and another BBQ place, and there were several informal groups that met up at the buffet, went to local restaurants, had in room cocktail parties, breakfast, and so forth. We do these type of trips a couple times a year, and everyone always seems to have a blast.

Next trip is 8 of us meeting in Vegas from different places. Half are staying at PH and half at Cosmo, so good proximity, which we have learned is very helpful. We have planned one dinner, one suite get together, and an afternoon of casino hopping. The rest will fall into place, and I know it will be a great time.

Anyway, I guess my point is that expecting people to be together all the time is a recipe for disaster, as is being dependent on someone else to make plans for you.

And to the Pinball Hall of Fame scenario, as soon as I realized those knuckleheads were in the car, I would have run out and told them I didn't realize that they were ready to go, but I want to stay so we will see you later (at whatever the next scheduled event was).

 

I live right near 9 casinos in AC. I have many friends. NONE of my friends would consider a casino/resort as a destination even for dinner or a day trip. They won't gamble. They won't tolerate the smoke. My family, though spread across the US, is all the same. Las Vegas is just about the last destination they would choose to travel. Everyone I know just puts a smirk on their face if the subject of gambling or casinos comes up. (I never bring it up, but when the subject comes up they look right at me.) Luckily, I enjoy solo casino trips.

 

Thanks for all the advice VMB friends. I think if we ever travel as a group I will suggest these inputs and encourage the group to also air their ideas and concerns:

1) Separate modes of transportation. Maybe we can ride together to our agreed activity and then after that, those who want to do other things can uber or taxi.

2) Ask everyone to submit the things they would like to do. Then we can get together and hash out some kind of loose itinerary. Hopefully we can find things we all have in common and take it from there.

3) Talk about the last trip and how we can improve it.

4) Make it very clear that it's ok if some of us are not interested in doing something that at first was agreed upon by all. All that is asked is that we let each other know so we can take alternative measures so as not to hold everybody up.

The problem is with #2 one of my SIL actually group texted all of us a couple of days before the trip and asked us what we would like to do and see in Vegas. The majority of the texts were from just 2-3 people out of the seven of us. I even texted why there were no input from the other people, and that it seems only some of us were doing all the talking.

 

Don’t take this the wrong way.....you’re trying too hard to make everyone happy...

If hey ask you for advice, give it. If they don’t, enjoy your trips....it’s that simple.

 

Yeah, I'm working on that too. We all know we can't make everyone happy. I do find myself trying too hard at times.