So How's Your Day?

Let me start it like this, today is my 31st b-day and I still live with my family, in about 30 days I move to the West coast and I'll never have to hear from them again. As far as I care they won't exist to me when I leave. My relationship with my family seems to have become worse year after year. But yet I give whatever I can to help them out, I'm still treated like dirt most of the time. To make matters worse, for the first time ever, not only 1 member of my family but my entire family forgot it was my birthday today.

What would you expect to have for dinner on your b-day, something nice right? Nah I got Shepard's Pie. And my step-father is in no way a cook. Any cake afterwards, nope because these "people" forgot.

At least when I visit Vegas I'll be able to finally relieve some of my stress and enjoy myself a bit. Because right about now I feel nothing but anger. But how's everyone else day playing out? Sorry for my rant, felt like I needed to say this.

 

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!!! I can't comment on the family situation, as I've not experienced what you seem to be going thru other than many people in our office have adults your age living at home and it seems to be stressful for all involved. Perhaps the distance will actually help repair the relationships. In any event, hope you make the best of things... bridges are better when built than burned.

 

Happy Birthday ... I can relate to the family situation. Been there, done that and the relationship generally gets better when you dont have to deal with them 24/7. Sounds like you need Vegas in a bad way

 

Sorry to hear about your situation. Best of luck to you on the west coast and happy birthday.

 

I second, third, and fourth this. My relationship with my parents improved dramatically once I wasn't living there; I'd moved out for college, but then moved back for a couple years afterwards, and things took a definite downward turn until I headed out for law school. Thankfully they remember my birthday, but that's about it; a couple years ago I started going to Aria for Thanksgiving weekend (this is now tradition for me and my friends), and when I told my mother she responded, brightly, "Oh! Okay!" When I clarified that I was planning on being home for Thanksgiving proper, and then leaving for Vegas the next day, she almost sounded kind of let down. Ah well.

Either way, happy birthday, and I'm glad you've got a place to rant. More people need an outlet, in my opinion.

 

Happy Birthday Vagabond! You are embarking on an exciting time in your life. An opportunity to build a new life and make new friends. A chance to develop a new sense of community.

Can't comment on your situation, but time and distance can do wonders in family relationships.

Best wishes to you.

 

How was my day? Not bad, though I spent a good bit of it cleaning up the yard after our little dinner bash for 30 on Saturday night. And sweet baby Jesus did we put a hurt on the wine supply!

Family dynamics are what they are. It's a good thing for you you recognize exactly what it is, and while it's disappointing you're moving along. I'm always thankful that our family is so close, even the extended branches, and this type of stuff is foreign to us.

Your new future is out there so just get to that and hopefully a change in scenery will do you good. As stated, resist the impulse for a little scorched earth 'cause you never know when you might want to revisit that ground again.

If there's time left on your birthday grab a bud, go have a few cold ones and a few laughs!!

 

Happy Birthday!

Family can be a royal pain sometimes. We don't get to pick them and we are stuck with them. Oh well, when you move away you can start a new family all your own (they will drive you crazy too).

By the time I was in my teens I was well past wanting to do anything for my birthday. It's just another day and only means I'm that much closer to old age. (Something my child takes great delight in reminding me of)

Find something that will make you happy and do it for yourself. You don't need them to give you a special day. Bake/Buy your own cake and enjoy it all to yourself.

 

This situation is not unique.

Family is overrated.

The fact is, for a majority of people family members are more of a negative in their life than a positive. For various reasons they can't walk away.

Whether it is a lousy marriage, overbearing parents and siblings, or a poor upbringing most people deep down can't stand their own family.

If I was you I would feel grateful about being able to walk away.

 

Happy Birthday and good luck on the west coast. Being young and on your own in a new city can be the time of your life! Try to meet some cool people and make the most of it.

 

Happy birthday first off...
I feel ya big homie...
I'm about to turn 31 myself (in October), and just a few months ago (on Easter, actually);
I packed a suitcase and walked out of the only home I ever knew, and haven't looked back since...
Yeah, its been tough (left behind a 12 year career $50k a year career, 3 cars {including a Corvette} and all of the niceties I'd accumulated over the years) but I chose family over a female before...and that didn't work out (and lemme tell ya, she was a hottie), so I decided to not do it again...
So, in closing, I've been at that junction man...just keep your head up and you'll do just fine.
And if not, well...you can always jump off a bridge, LoL.

 

Happy birthday im younger then you and also live at home but I like it so far my parents dont bother me too much and i can save a lot of money to loose at the casino

 

That takes a lot of guts.

Kudos.

 

hope you had a good birthday. yes, moving out makes a big difference. you get your independence but also have to learn to grow up, how you have to handle expenses and problems on your own, how you have to rely mostly on yourself for everything and have no fall back plan or safety net.

I left home for college when I was 17 and never looked back and other than breaks and vacations I never went back home for more than a week or two. After college I never was back for more than a few days. Moving out made me feel independent and a little spoiled because I had only myself to take care of. that was over 35 years ago. Funny because last year my mother moved islands because all the kids lived in Honolulu and she didn't have anyone on Maui for assistance. IMHO, kind of a pain since now I have to run errands or take her calls when she needs something or help. when she lived on Maui I would visit her maybe once a year or two, call her maybe a few times a year so it was great for me. we never had a good relationship and so being apart was the best thing for all of us (my sister and brother felt the same way).


My sister is having the same problem now, her kids are in their mid 20's and having problems living at home. I keep telling the kids that if they don't like it they should just move out and fend for themselves but they like the convenience of not paying rent or having to worry about food on the table.

I think it's for the best to move out since you don't have a good situation living with your family. be aware though, since you will be on your own you might not have people to wish you happy bd or go out for a bd dinner (not that you have that now so it might not be much difference lol) so you will have to make new friends or just learn to live by yourself until the love of your life comes by.

.

 

I live at home with my parents and my son, It is not east at ALL. I honestly want to move out and be with my son but my parents are my "car company" so with the amount I have to pay for a car payment they won't let go, it is bad. I give them Vegas or Disney trips a few times a year and all they ever do is complain about how little I do. I work part time, go to school full time and raise my son. The father has recently decided he wants us to try and work it out by being civil to each other, being able to get along and like each other again and my parents say no way, so It may come to my son and I moving out and living with his dad in a few short months. I say that if tow parents can work it out and live civiliy with each other then go for it. that was the issue, he never wanted to live together but apparently now he does.. we will see the motives if we can survive this trial period of talking and getting along.