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Worst trip ever, April 1-6, Edibles and Green Door

Discussion in 'Vegas Trip Reports' started by IWannaBeInVegas, May 5, 2018.

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  1. WelshBlonde

    WelshBlonde High-Roller

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    Sounds like she is keeping her options open by going back and fourth between you and this other guy.

    I know it may be hard but I would sever all ties. It will be best in the long run and allow you to move on.

    Sounds like you still had some good parts of the trip though so all was not lost. Thanks for the TR!
     
    21 days in Paradise! 5 hotels and 3 weeks of fun!
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  2. Sonya

    Sonya Queen of VMB

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    That's exactly what is happening. And you're right that is the best course of action. It's also what dozens of VMBers told him in the other thread a few months ago. So he took her to Vegas, let her ruin the trip for him and then thought about marrying her. Yeah, I'm out. Live your best life, I Wanna, but that girl is going to ruin you if you let her. And you ARE letting her.
     
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  3. TIMSPEED

    TIMSPEED On a casino hiatus until 2019.

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    Get “M” help quick!
    For a normal human to sleep as much as she did she’s either very very sickly; or using some hefty tranquilizers.
     
  4. makikiboy

    makikiboy VIP Whale

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    Nice pictures and you are lucky that you didn't get married. That would have been a major mistake. I think she realized the problems (between the two of you) when you proposed so didn't take advantage of your proposal so consider yourself lucky.

    I am always surprised when I see how low the water level is at the dam.
     
  5. saintpauljeff

    saintpauljeff VIP Whale

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    thanks for the summary... whoa man, you need to go no contact, gotta find a different woman to distract yourself
     
  6. Tifysue

    Tifysue Tourist

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    I'm sorry that the trip was so miserable for you. It's very, very difficult to deal with someone who sleeps so much. As I was reading your report I thought, "Wow, this girl can sleep as much as I can. I wonder if she has narcolepsy?" If you do remain friends, try to encourage her to get the sleep study and MSLT. It could change her life.
     
  7. pikabu

    pikabu High-Roller

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    Great photos! Life is better without so much drama; words of wisdom from a youngish senior. Best wishes to you.
     
  8. OhioStateAlum

    OhioStateAlum Low-Roller

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    This. The two months on, two months off, her going back & forth between two boyfriends, and you thinking your buddy is trying to bang her sounds like the average relationship of a high school sophomore.

    This chick isn’t bringing you down or ruining you, though- your choices regarding her are bringing you down.
     
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  9. dmr

    dmr Registered Abuser

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    Here are some semi-random thoughts and feelings and some suggestions. Sorry if I'm being too much of a buttinsky here.

    First of all, I do hope you and M work things out! Relationships can sometimes take some work, and some give and take on both sides.

    I'll give some suggestions, coming from someone who is probably close to her 100th Las Vegas trip, solo, couple, and group, business, pleasure, and mixed. I've made about every mistake that could be made in planning and doing Las Vegas trips and mostly I've learned from the mistakes. For our extended family trips I've kinda fallen into the role of "social director" who does most of the general planning. For business trips I've kinda fallen into the role of the one who "knows Vegas" the best, even more so than some who are local.

    One thing I'll suggest which I really think will help you out is to go with the flow a bit more.

    Plans are necessary for a multi-person LV trip, as without plans, you will spend more time discussing, debating, arguing, etc. about what to do than you will spend doing things! That is a lesson I learned the hard way! However, there are really about only two kinds of things on a typical pleasure trip that are really "in stone", those being restaurant reservations and show start times. (And, I will add, getting up on time to go on a photo shoot of a scenic area when the light is just so!) :) :) :) About anything else is NBD if you move it on your schedule, postpone it, do something else, etc. Remember that your enjoyment comes two ways. First is the enjoyment of the activity at hand, the other is the enjoyment of the company of those you are with.

    The terms "nap" and "we" in the above stand out like sore thumbs.

    First of all, in any Las Vegas planning, you need to allow for, if not actively schedule for, some down time! Not everyone will have the same energy level, the same jetlag tolerance, and the same need for power naps. I enjoy a power nap now and then, and when I don't get them I can get very b*tchy and argumentative, which is not something you want on a LV trip and is what I think may be in play here between you and M.

    That's the "nap" part, let's get to the "we" part. ...

    There is no rule in the world, or in Las Vegas that you ("you" as in plural, either couple or group) need to be joined at the {whatever} and doing the same thing at the same time, all day, all night, all the time! If one of you wants to take a power nap, then the other(s) can do something else and nobody should feel bad, rejected, slighted, etc., for it! Let's also get back to the "we" and "nap" things and {blush} the "we" here might mean that it will be something other than restful sleep, which I what I'm hearing that M wanted. :) :) :) LOL, you also mentioned edibles, and those will be very effective in bringing on the desire for a nap. Well, that's what "they" tell me, anyway. :) :) :) :)

    If M wants to sleep, let her do so. She'll be much nicer to be with after the nap and you can do other things in the meantime. Play VP, go on a photo walk (you obviously have a camera and know how to use it!), there's so much to do alone, as a couple, or as a group.

    Likewise, if you don't want to do the rides at the Strat, don't. Let those who do, do them. You can play VP in the casino. (This is EXACTLY what I did when the group I was with wanted to do the tower there.)

    There are a couple of social dynamics I'm seeing here. First, nobody wants to be the odd person out, third wheel, etc. A may very well be in that position, and it can be uncomfortable, particularly if you and M are acting as a single social unit when you are all together. You (in this case meaning you, first person singular, and M) need to be sure to actively include A. Another thing I'm kinda picking up on is that M may be feeling a bit crowded, and you really need to give her some breathing room if she needs it. I speak from experience here, another way to make me b*tchy and argumentative is to crowd me, physically or emotionally.

    Let's see here ... my current must-do list:

    1. Have a root canal without novocaine.
    2. Give my entire 401k to the Moonies.
    3. Undergo a bilateral elective amputation.
    4. Buy a timeshare.
    5. Go to a sex club.

    Seriously, I just don't think of intimacy as a spectator sport, but if you like it, hey, do it.

    LOL, enough said on that. :)

    Speaking very freely here, you may need to redefine your relationship, and again I speak from experience. My ex and I are still the best of friends (and {blush} why am I telling you this? occasionally more than friends) but we realized that we can't live under the same roof! You don't want it to progress to the "if we are together in two months, one of us will be dead" type of thing. We're even talking of trying another LV trip! :) When the arguing starts to get more and more frequent, something is wrong. My hunch is that you and M are not on the same page regarding what you want your relationship to be. The two of you will need to work this out if you genuinely care for each other and wish to remain part of each others' lives.

    I've probably said enough, I'll shut up. :) :)
     
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  10. TRN

    TRN WSOP-bound

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    Went to Vegas with a coworker a few years back, for a conference... he was tired the entire time he was there... said all the walking, sights, lights, sounds, it was just sensory overload for the guy and he had to sleep. Ended up sleeping 16-18 hours per day. Was fine when he got home, didn't feel sick at all, just hella tired. Was going to visit his dr when we got home if he was still tired, but the moment he got off the plane at home he was out of that. I wonder if "M" had a little bit of the same thing going on - walking, sensory overload, maybe even moreso when you add in the edibles, etc.
     
  11. Kimsa70

    Kimsa70 High-Roller

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    I was,thinking the same thing. Is she ill or maybe takes medication you don't know about that causes drowsiness?

    The other mention by TRN, of sensory overload is possible. I get that way in crowds and malls and anywhere with a lot of noise. I love casinos and concerts, but can only take so much and need a lot of "alone" time to recharge after facing the Vegas crowds and noise for hours on end.
     
  12. IWannaBeInVegas

    IWannaBeInVegas VIP Whale

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    That is a bit too funny.

    Thanks, appreciate the comments about the photos. Yeah. She and I actually talked about the trip the other day and she was saying how much she enjoyed it and apologized for making it my worst trip.

    This is where I am conflicted. I do love her, I cant deny it, everyone that knows me and knows us knows it. I admit I do think she may one day try to come back, in a week, month or six months, but I honestly cant say I want it to happen or I would take her back. I know my role and place and do not like it. But she is also my best friend, the only person on this earth other than myself that I can be 100% me around and not worry about judgement.

    I said something to her like this, it was more along the lines of "I will be playing, drinking and you know the ladies that love money will be coming to sit with me" and her response was "I trust you, I know you love me and would not do that to me".
     
    Christmas adventures (Tenitive)
  13. IWannaBeInVegas

    IWannaBeInVegas VIP Whale

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    I see that as well. She of course claims she does not want to keep me as a "reserve" yet it was funny because yesterday we were talking and she told me she wanted me to move on, I told her if someone came along I surely was not going to wait around and her response was "I dont mean with another woman" and I asked what that meant and she did not really have an answer until later in the evening when she said it she just did not want me to rebound or something.

    Yes there was good in the trip, I wont lie and I confess I enjoy solo trips but it was nice to have people there to hang out with as well, people I know.

    The marriage thought was a drunk high moment and I am so glad it did not happen.

    She blames it on her bipolar. I know all the meds she takes, have looked them up. The only ones that would cause her to be drowsy are her bipolar meds. She also is getting a thyroid ultrasound done in June.

    Im glad we did not get married, but her reasonings were 1. the ring and then she had some personal things that I wont discuss here. She wanted to, but just not at that moment THANK GOD.

    Wish it were so easy.


    So far we are remaining friends. She thought she had that and talked to her doctor, dont know what test they did but doc determined it was not the case.

    I agree, I hate drama, im near 40 and feel like a young senior, LOL.


    Cant disagree

    I am replying to what is in bold. First off, thank you for thought you put into your reply, and I have to say I have been looking at your photos on here for quite some time and they are damn good. I went to school for photography and this trip only had my iPhone X. Anyways onto the reply.

    I think your the first person, not just hear but in general that hopes we work things out. I have always been willing to put in the efforts for the relationship, I love her even with the hell I have been through. Sadly the love she has for me is not close to what I have for her I dont think.

    I did not want to have a plan for the trip. She insisted on having at least a daily schedule that she knew we would not stick to 100% but at least she could check off 2-3 things a day that I really wanted her to do. Other than stay awake she did see pretty much everything on the bucket list she had except the Fremont St light show, we were suppose to go back down but never did.

    We actually had in the schedule for her daily at least a 1 hour nap. She was ecstatic about that. I guess the first day I understand the need for a nap and going to bed early, we had only about 2 hours of sleep from the previous day since we worked the day before and then did not have everything we needed to do at home done. As for some time that was not restful sleep, yep that was important too, had to have time for that. The only ones of us that were effected by the edibles was A and myself, M never felt a thing and she was disappointed. Had I not watched her eat the first one I would have thought she threw it out. She too is nicer with sleep. I gambled while she slept, but I could not seem to win when she was not there, its like she was my good luck charm.

    Not sure what you mean by redefine the relationship. We were on the same page of wants/needs for the most part. Only thing she really wanted from me that I cant provide for about 10 more years is more money in the bank that can be disposable. I have a nice retirement account but cannot access it until I am 50. But as I said at the onset of this report, she had $15000 disposable money in the bank, her dad sends her $50,000 a year so, in the typical asian mindset (sorry if any of you are asian, no offense is meant by this comment) money is very important to her. During the relationship most of our arguments were over petty stuff and I would venture to guess were partly because we were together nearly 24/7, we were basically living together (either I sleep at her house or her mine) plus all of our off time from work was together and we worked the same shift at the same place, so we never had any alone time and I am it was a big contributor to our problems.

    I am doing everything I can to keep her in my life as a friend.



    I dont think it was sensory overload for her. She always wants to sleep when she can. She actually has some diet medication that she could have brought but did not due to the fact they are not legal in the USA (imported from the Philippines) and they actually have quite a bit of caffeine and when she takes those can stay awake all day. A couple of those is equal to about 6 cups of coffee for her, but she did not want to risk getting caught with them at the airport.

    Nope, I know all the meds she is taking and the only issue she has medically is a hyper thyroid, I know I have been to every doctors appointment and other than an abnormal pap that they will test for again in a few months and the thyroid she is healthy.
     
    Christmas adventures (Tenitive)
  14. 63hearts

    63hearts Low-Roller

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    Perfect, green light to put the cell in the safe and disappear for a couple hours of fun!!
     
  15. jr7110

    jr7110 VIP Whale

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    You owe your friend "A" a HUGE apology.

    You were in an altered state and overreacted and accused him of doing something that he obviously was not trying to do. Just because you cannot trust your Ex GF doesn't mean that your insecurities about her behavior apply to other people. You stated that before this exchange happened, "A" said he wanted to go back to his room. "M" wanted another gummy and they were figuring all that out when he said that they could go back to his room and "settle it". HE HAD BEEN TRYING TO GET BACK TO HIS ROOM THE WHOLE TIME! It's obvious all he meant was she could pay him for it when they got there, because prior to that whole exchange, he had made it crystal clear that he really wanted to go back.

    When people are drunk and high it leads to all sorts of bad decisions, which might be why you lashed out initially, but you still think he is guilty to this day. If I were "A" and that happened to me, I would have packed and left the hotel that night. Either checked in somewhere else and ignored my phone the rest of the trip and done my own thing, or would have just flown back home. I certainly would not stick around if someone was threatening me over their mis-perception of what was going on, but mainly because what kind of friendship is it if you don't trust each other? I can't be friends with people I don't trust, and you should really apologize to your friend if you consider him a true friend, They are not that easy to find, you know.
     
    Last edited: May 7, 2018
    Vegas, Baby!
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  16. dmr

    dmr Registered Abuser

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    Well, it sounds like you (singular or plural, choose one) have a BF/GF relationship with the expectation that it may lead to a life partnership, and you may need to revise your expectations. You need to get to a place where you both genuinely enjoy each other's company when you are together.

    Uh, trust me here, if you spend much of your time together arguing, you are not on the same page for the most part!
     
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  17. Royal Flusher

    Royal Flusher Savvy Gambler

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    Sorry you had a rough trip. For what it's worth, I found every bit of the report vastly entertaining.

    That $1800 on the table draw to 21 bullshit... that musta hurt. Sometimes I do wonder how those 21 dealer draws magically happen at the right moments.
     
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  18. hammie

    hammie VIP Whale

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    I see what you did there, that's a metaphor, right?
     
    Last edited: May 7, 2018
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  19. fudgewapner

    fudgewapner Low-Roller

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    I remember you talking about your life and "girlfriend" back in the fall. You obviously need to break all contact with her and never speak to her again. You likely know that but just won't do it. The "fish in the sea" cliche is really true. There are thousands of women that would be compatible with you that aren't bipolar, depressive, manipulative, possibly a closet drug addict. She likely needs treatment, not to move back and forth between different dudes. You likely know you're getting played, at least I hope so. And you seem like a decent dude (except for freaking out on A when high and drunk), it's best to focus on yourself and your own happiness. Try to sit down and think "how's this going to work out in 5 years?" Path A, you keep being involved with her. Or Path B you focus on yourself/hobbies/exercise, and maybe move away to another city. Which path is going to lead to a more fruitful life that's what YOU need?
     
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  20. fudgewapner

    fudgewapner Low-Roller

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    And I'm not picking on you, but these are your own words "Only thing she really wanted from me that I cant provide for about 10 more years is more money in the bank that can be disposable". So, she gets to go to another guy when she pleases, come back to you when she pleases. Get your attention when desired. Ruin vacations (by your own admission), and then request that you need to have more disposable funds for her usage. And you get to put up with this, pay for trips, and then hope she comes back to you. It honestly just makes me sad for another guy to put up with this, it's really disheartening.
     
    21st Bday party for friend's son - will get ugly.
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