Trip Report gone awry!!

A little background: My wife and I got married last November. I'd been to Vegas 4 times before this trip, her three. This is the first trip where we didn't have obligations of entertaining people, or sightseeing, or weddings or nuthin'. A trip to just do whatever.

We usually go to Cancun or someplace tropical to end the summer. This year we thought we'd do Vegas with a tropical theme. We'd choose our hotel based on the pools. Our choices?

2 days at the Flamingo, 2 days at Mandalay Bay.

Day One- Our flight gets into Vegas 1/2 hour early. Yeah!! The entire cabin erupted in spontaneous applause.

We grab our bags and run over to the airport check-in for the Flamingo....and it's closed. Curses! We taxi over to the hotel and no one's in the check-in line. Suh-weet!! Turns out they have a room ready in the a newly refurbished room and the maid is just finishing up. We get up to the room and wait in the hall..and wait...and wait.....and...wait. After several smokes and chit-chat, we ask the maid what's up. I guess the previous occupants trashed the room and she has to shampoo the whole rug, then dry it. It's be 3-4 hours before we can have our room. Fark!!

We go back down and ask for another room and they tell us they have nothing else. Dayam!!

To kill time, we take a tour of the property. Looks do-able. Then I take her on a quick tour of the lower ends casinos. (She likes to stay at Bellagio, MGM, etc. She's never really set foot in the second, third and fifth tier places.) So we do a walk through of O'Sheas, Barbary Coast, Casino Royale, IP...anyplace halfway close. I pointed out the much lower table limits and increased odds.

Her response?

Then why do you always go downtown if you can get the same action here?

After she recovered from the wet willie I gave her for such blasphemy, I told hr that downtown is downtown and that, my good woman, is THAT!!

So, anyways, we walked by Madame Tousous. Brrr, creepy!! The Michael Jordan figure out front looked like it was going to move at any second. I'm not kidding. Freakishly real looking. If ti had some animatronic thing that made it move, I guarantee I would have screamed like a little girl scout who dropped a month's load of cookies. Shiver. We ended up taking the tour of the place the second day. Those figures are so real looking it made my stomach twist and turn. It actually spooked me.

We grab some grub at the food court at the Venetian, then get back to our room...and it's ready. And only 4 hours later!! Sigh.

FLAMINGO ROOM: We asked for a newer room and if that was a newer room, then, well, color me unimpressed. The furniture was scratched up, then painted over and it was pretty obvious. A room is a room to me. Hell, I enjoy IP, but my wife was starting to get that look and I started to panic. Then she said, "Well, we got what we paid for" and said it was okay.

Phew!

The room didn't smell or anything and there were no glaring defects, but even I had a few nitpicks.

First of all, would it kill them to buys some new bedding? Yup, both of our beds, the blanket under the top sheet had tears and cigarette burn holes in it. And what's with charging $3.00 a day to use the safe? Thats' kinda petty,isn't it?

Second, you can listen to music on the TV...if you pony up something like $13 a day or something like that. Plus there's no cloack radio. So no tunes. Dayam!!

Third, the tolietries. A bottle of shampoo and a bar of soap. WheeooOOooo!! Don't go hog wild on the freebees, Flamingo. Howsabout a littel mouthwash? Q-Tips? Lotion? Something!!

But that's okay. The room served it's purpose. Still, a little low cost attention to detail would have gone a long way.

FLAMINGO POOL: Oh...My...GAWD!! I mean, OMG!! We got down to the pool at 8:30 on day two and every single chair was taken. I kid you not. Very. Freaking. Chair. How? If someone wasn't in the chair, there was the ever present towel with a book sitting on it. Bullshi..er, horsehockey!! We managed to wedge a coupe of stacked chairs in a spot, that ended up being great, and waited for the sun to rise enought to actually hit the pool. We actually timed a set of 4 chairs. It took the people an hour and a half to show up. I vowed that if it happend again, I'd take the seats I want and tell the people "No Sav-sees!" Un-freakingbelievable.

What was sad is watching family after family come down with their kids wanting to use the pool and have some seats, but they have no spot to set up in cause all the jerks saving seats.

Now to a pet peeve of mine. We saw this both days.

WHAT'S WITH ALL YOU GUYS WITH HAIRY BACKS AT THE POOL??!!

OMG, show a little pride in yourself! Show a litle class. We saw more hairy back guys at that pool than we've ever seen in our entire lives. Ewww!! To be honest, I get some hair myself, but I either go get a wax once a month, or use man-Nair. Dudes, get with the program. Wet hedgehogs are NOT appealing.

Also, what's with all the heavy people?? I mean, wow. I don't mean to sound like a jerk, but I've never been at a pool with so many overweight, hairy folks. It was plain weird. I felt like I was sitting in Darwin's waiting room. We both enjoy ogling some prime beefcake and honeys, but there were very few to be found.

Our stay at the Flamingo had a really low rent feel to it in every aspect. No pretty people and just a not quite hip feel to things.

DINING: I told this story on another thread, but it bears repeating. I've eaten at Lindy's twice in the past. Not looking for fine dining, just a little grub a step above fast food. Last time I was there, I ordered breakfast and when they dropped the food off, they didn't bring my milk. My server disappeared. I grabbed another and told my plight. She said she'd get my server. As my pancakes cooled, I hten got a manager, who said he'd get me my milk. As I finished my second to last bite, my milk arrived. Great.

So, being open-minded, I give them a third try.

My girl and I both order dinners and drink our diet cokes before our meals are done. Hoping for a refill, we wait for the waiter to check back on us..and wait...and wait. We finally finish up and want our check. A waitress finally managed to track our guy down and he dropped off the check. Guess what? He forgot to charge us for my dinner. And he never comes back. So we get the manager and tell him what happened. After about 10 minutes, he comes back, hands me the check with the full charge on there and apologizes for the inconvenience. I'm thinking at this point, howsabout you give me a little discount for being honest and not just stiffing you guys outta a meal? I coulda walked out. That's it. I'm done with Lindy's.

Okay, I got a little sidetracked. I think I'll wrap up for now.

Coming next, Mandalay Bay, Sunday night at Light, A peek at Dennis Rodman's butt and a 3 mile death march from Circus Circus to Mandalay Bay..on foot...at 2 a.m. Arghh!!

 

Beat old people????? Have you always had that or did I just notice it???? OOPS! Maybe I'm getting old! But I'm only 4 years older than you....

Debbie

 

My old icon disappeared. I came across the one that I have and found it so weird that I simply had to use it for a while. Bizarre, huh?

 

That was really funny so far. Can't wait to read your review of MB.

 

Wet hedgehogs need love, too. Not all of us are the perfect physical specimens that you must be. The phrase "dim pretty boy" comes to mind...

just kidding. liked the report so far.

 

Wet hedgehogs! That was a hilarious trip report! Now, every time I see a guy with a hairy back, I'm gonna think "wet hedgehog". Too funny!

I have to add, Blind_Molly, your response was pretty funny too!