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Jonathan would you please apologize for calling me a f...king idiot?

Discussion in 'Vegas Trip Reports' started by hoochiemama, Mar 31, 2018.

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  1. martinr

    martinr VIP Whale

    Aug 19, 2012
    Trips to Las Vegas:
    Brief as it will probably be, I feel like we deserve an explanation. Or, in your language: Chel hkr r cw
    Hand Pay....Hand Pay....Hand Pay
  2. hoochiemama

    hoochiemama Low-Roller

    May 9, 2012
    Trips to Las Vegas:
    Okay, so I'm not Jonathan but I am an idiot. Those notes were horrible. I had some fun reliving the trip through my notes so ended up expanding a bit…

    Had a trip planned for about two months. This was a trip in the middle of July. Originally planned to leave on Saturday morning. Turned out Thursday, kids and dogs were gone and we had no reason to delay. Looked at flights and we were able to change flights to Friday night. Start looking for rooms and ended up grabbing a $20 room at golden gate!


    Off to airport Friday, hoped for an earlier flight, but no luck. Grabbed some pizza and beer and waited. Flight was delayed over an hour…nothing you could do.

    Was trying to talk wife into Uber for a while, finally had some good coupons and tried it out. It was ok, but a bit awkward. Guy had a bunch of kid stuff (car seats, etc in the back seat), plus had a bunch of stuff in the trunk but we made it work.

    Got to golden gate after midnight…was expecting one of the tiny rooms, but doh! Unfortunately they ran out and needed to upgrade us to a suite! That room was awesome! Would definitely stay in one of those again.

    Played a bit just do say we did, and called it a night (latest us old fogeys have been up in Vegas -2:30!)


    Woke up about 9…comfortable bed. We always spend some time downtown, but first time we've stayed in a while.

    I had a $25 match play I wanted to use and was planning on using it on roulette red. I stood there what felt at least 5 minutes while the dealer set up. He didn't say one word to me so I had no idea it was going to be so long. It was weird. I just ended up leaving. Went to hash house for breakfast which was awesome.

    Back to gg to use match play, but 0. Off to the D for another $25 match play. Wife played roulette 1-18 and won, I played some craps (could use it on the pass line). Ended up +125 so not too bad.

    Head over to Paris via uber (had a groupon). Lots of confusion (both us and driver) about where to pick up, but finally ended up finding each other. Much more "normal" ride than the airport ride. Just quiet.

    We were checking in early with a burgundy room reservation…tried to get Eifel view, but only red room was available for $25 - sold! Overall we were way impressed by Paris. Great view and Red room was nice.

    Grab a drink at Hexx, played some craps - up another $200, nice.

    We booked some last minute tickets to Zumanity - one of the only Cirque shows we haven't seen. Tried to get uber, but again seemed too confusing. We saw our driver on the app drive around and seemed like he got lost. So got frustrated and just canceled the ride and walked. Got to NYNY, but totally sweating. Hit Nine Fine Irishmen for some Guinness as is tradition. Zumanity the show was humorous in parts and somewhat entertaining, but overall it was way too long…they have a bunch of separate acts, and after each one I kept waiting for it to be the last one. Would not necessarily recommend. With too many uber frustrations for the day, just took a taxi home. Easy. Crashed out, Paris nightclub noise was noticeable, but not bad.


    Had a travelzoo voucher for Giada - I think it was $45 for $30 or something. Went there for breakfast. We had been there before, it was great food…place was very mellow without too many people.

    Wanted to play craps, but just wasn't feeling it at Cromwell…tried bubble craps instead and lost $20.

    Went over to Margaritaville…I had a rum runner think, but it was way too sweet and switched to beer.

    Had a heck of a craps run at Harrahs. There were a couple guys that had some good long rolls…I had a pass and come bet covering all the numbers for a while…it just kept raking in! It was nice, but I wasn't even maxing odds so could have been much better. I still walked away with $675! Not too shabby.

    Off to Wynn for a drink. On the way we overheard a family that just made our day. There was a teenager walking ahead of his parents. Didn't hear the dad say a word. Only heard the mom (in the most calm mannered kindergarten teacher voice) telling her full grown teenage son: "Jonathan, would you please apologize for calling me a fucking idiot." We had to control ourselves from not busting up. It wasn't the words so much as the way she said it…she was so calm and refined. It cracked us up because we also have teenagers at home and can only imagine what happened up to that point and after. It let us know that we are not alone :)

    Anyways Parasol Up had a great drink as always. Made it over to the fashion mall, then over to Cosmo. We had doubled booked Cosmo ($109/nt) and Paris (comped). We were going to just see if we could check in…dang the lines were nuts. Decided to screw it and come back later.

    Back to Paris and hit up the pool…we really enjoyed the place…had a bucket of beer, and then some. The pool was a nice mix of mellow and enough people around to make it fun, but not wild.

    Done with pool and I go back to Cosmo while wife gets ready. Still pretty long line, but just wait anyways. My wife wanted one of the rooms with the Japanese soaking tub (I get confused between studio and 1 bedroom). We had the other one booked. I asked if we could get the room with the soaking tub and the lady went and came back proud of herself that we could get it for $50 more. Ok I say since that's what she wanted. Got the keys, didn't check room - back to Paris, then BLT Steak.

    Another travel zoo voucher for BLT…good food, yummy popovers, just way too much food. We both kinda decided at that moment that maybe we're done with the nicer/fancyish dinners for a while and we'll just stick to happy hours, or other places. We'll see.

    After dinner we grabbed our bags and headed over to Cosmo. All the while my wife was looking forward to the Japanese soaking tub. We walk in and the room was huuuugggeee. You walk in and there is a bathroom immediately by the door, then sort of a short hallway, then a big living room/kitchen. After that there is a huge bedroom, and then it just keeps going into a bathroom almost the size of the bedroom! But no Japanese soaking tub. The room was totally awesome otherwise. It wasn't a wraparound, but the terrace was much bigger than other rooms we've stayed in. Despite all that, unfortunately it wasn't what we thought. We called the desk to see if we could get moved. I felt like an asshole complaining about this room because it was definitely worth the $50 upgrade and more. But complained nonetheless. Funny part was that all the while on the phone my wife was looking over at the paper work yelling that the clerks name was Chelsea. Only after a sober morning then we realize we were staying in the Chelsea tower! Doh!. Hotel was booked and couldn't move us so we dealt with it. Woke up sober and decided to just stay there. It was good…also felt like more of an asshole complaining when we saw they left a bunch of chocolate with anniversary wishes. Anyways, I know I need to be more clear next time. The manager called the next day and said he'd refund the upgrade fee and sure enough he did…Cosmo still rocks and wouldn't hesitate staying there.


    Today ended up being a busy day as we are leaving Tuesday and there's too much we wanted to do. It was a bit overwhelming.

    Today was our anniversary and we have a tradition to go to Mon Ami Gabi for breakfast. The place always delivers.

    Checked out of Paris, went over to tix 4 tonight to see about Brad Garrett comedy (new tradition since Harrah's improv closed down). $44 ok.

    We also had a massage deal at the Palms hotel via travelzoo. It was nice, but took a big chunk of time out of the last full day. They have some HAMMAM sauna…couldn't even see in there and it was crazy hot. Didn't last very long, but I'm sure it would be beneficial somehow! Played a little craps and slots, but nothing came of it…wouldn't really mind if I never made it back there.

    Back to cosmo to change, etc…went over to NYNY Nine Fine Irishmen…we like sitting at the bar upstairs, but it's not always open. This time it was, but it was closing in 20 min. We made the best of it and remembered the bartender from last year. She was a hoot.

    Decided to head over to Excalibur to play some (had fun there before). But made a bit of a detour over to Skyfall lounge. It was very relaxing and some nice bites to nibble on. I think I had a full on old school martini - wowza, that's a sipping drink. Bet some horses at Mandalay and won a whopping $3.50.

    Back to Excalibur, bet some craps, but nothing happened. I hit a hard 8, played bigshot and parlayed it, but lost.

    Finally made it over to Brad Garrett's comedy (he wasn't performing). All three comedians were pretty funny. It's a nice venue too. The headliner was absolutely hilarious. He was the type with a bunch of energy and just kept throwing zingers out there. Although I'm glad I learned before not to google guys before seeing them. Got home and checked out some youtube clips - some were from 5 years ago and he's still using the same jokes. But we had a great time, wife was crying so all was good.

    This was a long day and we just wanted some food. Granted it was during the week in the summer but come on. First we tried nacho daddy on the strip. Had heard about the downtown location on Five Hundy and wanted to give it a try. Well, they had half the place closed down and the hostess was not very welcoming…we just gave up. Next made it over to Cosmo and decided to try Jaleo. Again hostess basically didn't want us there, but didn't say it. I don't know what time they close, but guess it was pretty close. Finally just gave up on a sit down place got some secret pizza and ate out on the terrace!


    Last day :(.

    Got some coffee at Va Bene, I still was chasing another hot roll on craps but Cosmo only had a $25 table open? This was like 9am on a Tuesday. Way too rich for me so went to try PH. Found a $10 table. Crew was great, only a couple players came and went. Played a while but lost my $200.

    Headed back to room to pack up. Had time for lunch with my nephew. Tried wicked spoon but the line was way too long. Until I saw the sign for the separate gold members line. Well look at me, I recently got upgraded to gold via matching my hyatt credit card. Gleefully walk past all the suckers in line and waited for hostess. Luckily I realized my stupidity before she came - I am not gold at cosmo, but gold at MGM! Then we had to do the walk of shame back out. Ended up over at PH Burger and it was excellent along with the couple last beers!

    One more crappy craps session. But played quick hit and got $182 progressive on the first spin! I'll take it.

    Had enough uber for the trip so just cabbed it to the airport.

    All in all another great trip...always learn something we can do different next time...looking forward to another trip this summer!
    • Like Like x 4
  3. tdhoier

    tdhoier Big Time

    May 9, 2013
    Trips to Las Vegas:
    When comparing the first post to the last, it looks like we finally got Stands With A Fist to translate Kicking Birds goofy Sioux dialect.

    • Funny Funny x 2
    • Like Like x 1
  4. charlestfuller

    charlestfuller Low-Roller

    Jan 9, 2018
    Trips to Las Vegas:
    Great report. Too bad you had to end the trip on a couple losing craps sessions instead of vice versa.
  5. luridludicloco

    luridludicloco High-Roller

    Apr 20, 2016
    too darn far from the Strip
    Trips to Las Vegas:
    So that's what happened!:haha::haha::haha: Thanks for the report of enjoyable trip. Kidding aside, I am sure without your notes you would not be able to remember all the details and the sequence of events. Not that everything is in the notes, but what is there is an aid to your memory. We readers, if idle, could print both your notes and then print the report above, and see what corresponds to what. I wonder though if you could figure out all that was written in the notes. When I take notes for something, it does happen that every now and then a sequence of symbols leaves me staring at it with a blank mind. In the best cases I suddenly remember why I wrote it, and the experience it summarised comes to mind in full; in the worst cases whatever those symbols were about remains lost forever. Hope this last did not happen to you here and there in the notes. Anyway, it was fun to read your two versions. Best of luck this summer, perhaps experience some sort of record, an hour in a craps table with 17 coming out every other roll? :haha::wave:
  6. sabrina

    sabrina Low-Roller

    Jun 6, 2009
    Trips to Las Vegas:
    That was fun!
  7. Joe Strummer

    Joe Strummer VIP Whale

    Apr 4, 2006
    I read the first TP
    Thanks !
    The second one ?.....I bailed on it.
    My "A.D.D." kicked in ?
  8. hoochiemama

    hoochiemama Low-Roller

    May 9, 2012
    Trips to Las Vegas:
    Yeah, it all made sense to me (eventually). I struggled on a few points, but it became clear. In the past I've done the notes and wrote it all up a couple days later. But the past two years time got away!
    • Funny Funny x 1
  9. Richard Alpert

    Richard Alpert LOST

    Jul 22, 2015
    Trips to Las Vegas:
    I ordered this after the first post...

    cliff notes.jpg :poke: :D

    Thanks for coming back to expand your notes!
    Great job! :thumbsup:

    An "Egg-citing" Pre-Easter Trip!
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