So its Thursday, January 10th and I’m in the chat with the usual crowd and Angy asks me if I want to go to Vegas with her. I tell her I do, but have no clue how I can make it happen. Well, if you know Angy then you know she has big sway over me when she starts in one me (see: https://www.vegasmessageboard.com/forums/showthread.php?t=26805 for evidence of her amazing ability to peer pressure me into impromptu flights) Well, we worked up a plan and I was booked on a flight that night! Vegas here I come! So the appointed day rolls around and I get up at the butt-crack of dawn to hop on my SW flight. Hubby drops me off on his way to work, I check my Vegas Luggage, proceed to the gate and get to watch some dolt call the gate-person an idiot and an asshole because he couldn’t figure how to line up numerically. At least I was entertained. Get in to Vegas on time at 7:30 a.m. and proceed to wait for Angy and Scott to get in. I had forgotten to ask them which airlines they were on so after picking up my Vegas Luggage and a Venti Latte I stand in front of the arrivals board trying to play spot the flight. I knew what time they were coming in, so using my amazing powers of deductive reasoning I find that Angy will be here on time, but Scott is delayed an hour. Angy arrives and we decide to wait for Scott so she and I grab a couple of diet cokes to facilitate consumption of the Captain she was carrying (yes people, I drank rum...miracles do happen, but what are ya gonna do when you’re stuck in the airport and you’re desperate), then head outside to a bench where we drink and smoke and gab until its time for Scott to land. While waiting in baggage claim for him we decide we’re gonna try and pick him up and spin him around like he did us last year. We think that maybe if we do it together we can manage it. Scott arrives, and no we weren’t able to swing him around like a rag doll. The boy has lost a lot of weight, but not enough for us to accomplish our goal. Scott grabs his bag and we head out to find us a limo! Well, what we found us was an Excursion, but the driver was really fun so it was all good. Checked-In to Planet Aladdin-wood, and not long after that Drea waltzes her hot ass in the door. We stopped at the Bell desk to have them send our crap up to our room as Scott’s wasn’t ready, and then hit the elevator in search of our home for the next few days. When we get off the elevator the first thing we notice is the carpet. Its got red swirlies in it and Drea comments about how this does not bode well for our drunk asses when we try to get back to our room. After wandering about like a bunch of buffoons (Oh wait! We are buffoons!) We find our Resort room. It was pretty damn big, but the best part was that there were 2 vanities so plenty of room for primping and such without having to fight over counter space. Our room was the Eraser room and we had hottie Vanessa Williams staring down over our bathtub. We found that comforting and WAY better than if Arnie had been staring down at us. Bell brought our shit up and then we headed on down to the Peppermill so Drea could get her country fried steak on. Scott and I decided we too had to try out this most amazing foodstuff so we all ordered the same thing. Except Angy who always marches to her own beat. She had a BLTA and my blueberry muffin. I ordered my coffee and Bailey’s so I was a happy girl. Drea got attacked by the whip cream when the cw sprayed it on to my drink though, which is pretty funny especially considering how Drea HATES whipped cream! The food was really good, but I guess you have to be completely shitfaced for it to be orgasmic. While eating we made some plans for shopping that day...Angy wanted to look at purses, Drea needed jewelry...you know. After breakfast we headed over to Fashion Show and proceeded to get our shop on. Angy didn’t find the purse she wanted, but Drea and I did some really good shopping for jewelry! Angy had to go to Vickie’s to get a new bra so while she and Scott hung out there D and I hit up Bakers across the way. I know some of you are not going to believe this, but we really did go into a shoe store and not buy a damn thing! Again, miracles do happen. During our travels I also dragged the group into Hot Topic (because, you know, I have a thing) and we poked around in there for a bit, but I didn’t see anything I had to have so we left. We took Scott into Fredericks and told him to send pics of himself there to Terry, but he didn’t think that would be good unless the three of us were in skimpy lingerie so we just left. Our last stop was Express where Angy found a dress she was looking for and I scored the shirt you see in the H&H pics for like $5 out of the clearance boxes. Well, Angy paid for it because that line was too damn long for me to wait in to get a stupid clearance shirt. THANKS GIRL! It was at this point that we decide we need booze. I had been in Vegas for something like 6 hours and still hadn’t had a Corona so we head back to the hotel and hit up the Heart Bar for some adult beverages. There didn’t seem to be any cw’s about so D and I went to the bar. This is where we begin to notice the service levels at PH are not up to par. There is a bartender just to the left of us, but he’s too busy chit-chatting to help us. There is another bartender across the bar in front of us who, I shit you not, looked right at us 3 fucking times then turned around to help other people. D and I were not happy ladies. Ms. Bitch bartender finally deems to take our order so we FINALLY get our booze and head back to our table. This crap went on two more times until the cw finally came on shift. After that the booze was dealt fast and furious. We decide its time to head back to the room to get ready. Scott gets his key on the way up so he takes his bag and heads off to the other tower. The three of us get all gussied up. Drea had the boobies going ON and I told her I’d be getting lost in her boobies all night long. We made appointments to go to the salon and have our hair did the next day at 4 because we thought we’d be too lazy to do it on our own and because Terry wasn’t there so we couldn’t make him curl our hair (bitch!). At some point I start texting Sandra like there’s no tomorrow! She originally told me she was going to be in at 9:30. I told her if she wasn’t the first three rounds were on her (actually, I believe Scott told me to tell her that). It just took off from there. I think we probably sent like 30 texts while they were driving. We met Kikky downstairs for our 8:00 reservation at PF Changs. We hit the desk and the give us a fucking light up thingy! Dammit, why the hell did we make reservations if you’re going to make us wait? So we take our light up thingy and go stand near the entrance when I look through a small window and see a totally empty booth. I’m not happy about standing around with a light up thingy when Angy made reservations and a perfectly good booth is sitting there empty. They said it would be 10 minutes or so and I told everyone that if the thingy didn’t light up in 10 minutes I was gonna start bitching. I became distracted for a while though as I did, indeed, get lost in Drea’s boobies. She caught me and started laughing at me. I was like-I told ya it was gonna happen! Luckily at exactly 10 minutes it lit up and they seated us--in the booth we’d just been staring at. Bastards! We girls ordered some booze and Scott ordered water. Oh the grief we gave him! Hell, I even rated him out to Terry via text to shame him more! We got a whole bunch of appys and inhaled them like someone was going to come steal them if we didn’t. We ordered more booze and dinner. I guess the shaming worked, because Scott finally ordered a Corona. Our food came, and it got eerily quiet at our table as we shoveled food into our tummies! Of course, none of us could finish our orders, but DAYUM that was some tasty grub! By this time, Sandra and MizzKittie were almost here so we paid the bill and hit the lobby to wait for them. Those bitches were taking FOREVER to get there so I sent a text asking where the hell they were since they had said they were turning into the hotel like 20 minutes before. They were stuck in the longest Valet line ever! I called and asked what car they were in because I was gonna find a Valet guy and make him go get themimmediatly. Well, they were out of the car with all their crap and walking towards us. I’m sure we freaked everyone out with our echoing screams of “Bitches!” when we saw each other, but that’s how we roll. We took them up to their room and waited while they got ready. Someone felt that they needed some spanking and I happily obliged while simultaneously getting lost in Drea’s boobies again. Those girls were ready in no time (another miracle!) and so we all headed downstairs to catch a limo to H&H! Becky wasn’t up to hanging with us as she had been fighting a migraine all day so we said our goodbyes before we hopped in our limo. I must say, there’s nothing more fun than getting out of a limo at H&H. You wouldn’t believe the stares! We head inside and Sandra buys a round of shots for everyone since she was WAY later than 9:30 and It.Is.On! BC joins us with a boy in tow and Bliss joins us after a while (she had taken her daughter to a Hannah Montana concert earlier in the evening so she REALLY needed to get her drink on) and everything is right with the world! I start taking pics with my phone to send to Ron as is the H&H tradition, and the texting begins! We danced on the bar a number of times. We danced with each other a whole hell of a lot. We even danced with strangers! All the while I am furiously texting Ron and sending him pics of the fun...some of which were posted for your enjoyment. At one point I step outside to drunk dial his ass and we end up gabbing for so long that the group sends searchers to find me. Angy talks to him for a bit when she locates me then she heads back inside as I wrap up my conversation. Ron’s the best people. The only person I can drunk dial at like 4 am and have an hour long drunk ass conversation with! I head back in and Bliss berates me for disappearing. Oops! My bad. Bliss heads out as its after 2 and since she worked and had to go to that damn concert my girl is wiped out, but I’m damn proud of her for staying out until a respectable hour! We dance on the bar some more and then its time to head out. We drunk-stumble-walk our butts over to the GN to catch a cab. It is during a pit-stop at the ladies in GN when D finds she’s lost her wallet. Fuck! She and I searched that bathroom high and low--hell, I even dug (DUG) through the trash cans! No wallet. I made her fill out a report with security in case anyone found her ID at least and then Scott walked her back to H&H to see if it was there. We thought they were going to meet us back at the GN so we bellied up to the bar for some more booze while BC and Sandra made out with their boys (did I type that out loud?). Finally get a call from Scott asking where the fuck we were. Told him to wait for us at the Heart Bar since they were back at PH and hauled our butts into a cab. Somewhere along the way we lost BC...that bitch better not have driven home! Once back at PH, Sandra feels the roulette gods calling. $20 on black. Winner! I walk her drunk ass over to the cage to get her money then we head back towards the Heart Bar when the gods call her again. $20 on black. Winner! Back to the cage we go. The third time we actually get all the way to the Heart Bar, but Sandra and MizzKittie are done for the evening (light-weights!) and head off to bed. D had gone off to bed since she was going to have to go to the DMV when it got light(er) out to get a new drivers license (the ONLY reason she was let off the hook for preceding Angy and I to bed). I tell Scott the girls hit the hay and he finds that idea appealing as well so he takes off. Angy and I are the last ones standing-AGAIN. I guess I must ask if anyone is really surprised by that, because she and I certainly aren’t! Angy spots a hooker and heads over to chat her up (she enjoys talking to hookers for some reason) and I take a seat. There’s a guy there so I introduce myself since it looks like we’re gonna be table mates for a while and he tells me he’s from Albuquerque! No fucking way! That is too funny so off we go talking about home and all such stuff until Angy’s hooker decides she needs to move on. Angy joins in our conversation for awhile and the next thing I know there’s some 23 year old putting the moves on Angy. That boy did not want to take no for an answer either so eventually she disappears. I assume she’s gone to the ladies until she’s gone way too long for that to be the case so I want to go look for her. My new friend Steffan says he’ll come with me so we search the casino for her, I search the bathrooms and find no Angy. We head up to our room to see if she’s there and she is Thank God! We say goodnight to Steffan and plop ourselves down in the bathroom (Drea was asleep and on occasion we like to be good roommates and let people rest undisturbed) to gab. At some point we drunk dial Marty and leave some random incoherent message for him. After that we figure Al will be up and we call his ass. Angy relates the nights events to him and he tells us Scott is fired for not properly attending to his bodyguard duties. We say goodnight (we haven’t been to bed yet) to Al and chat a bit more before hitting the hay ourselves around 8:30 a.m. We had a good first Vegas day! I got up around noon and found Drea was gone off to the DMV and Angy was snoring away so I hit the bathroom floor again while I was downing water like there was no tomorrow and texting people randomly. At some point D comes in and we chat about her DMV experience and lament the loss of her wallet some more. She left to go tan and I decided I could do my own hair today so I called and cancelled my appointment then went back to sleep. D comes back to the room at like 3:30 and rouses Angy out of bed as they were supposed to be at the salon at 3:30. She rouses me too, but I inform them that I have cancelled my appointment so after Angy brushes her teeth and gets some clothes on they are out the door. I peruse the room service menu and decide to order the Continental breakfast as I’m starving and figure it won’t take that long to get to me since there is nothing that has to be cooked. I call in my order and the lady says it’ll be 45 minutes. This works for me as it gives me time to hop in the shower before my food gets here. Well that bitch lied to me! Angy and Drea were back from getting their hair did around 5, both looking HOT HOT HOT, and my food still hadn’t come. I called down and was told they were just putting my order on a tray and it would be right up...uh yeah, methinks they forgot me. My food gets there right about the time Angy and Drea decided what they were ordering from room service. I told them I hope theirs didn’t take as long as mine and offered to share my muffins with them, but they declined. At some point D talks to BC and it is decided we will do bottle service at Body English this evening. There is one problem. They won’t let Scott walk in with us. WTF???? I’m on the phone to Joe Schmo to find out if he knows who I need to tip to make sure Scott gets in with us, because we will NOT have him waiting in line to get in. He agreed with us that this was total bullshit and gave me some good advice. Thanks Mike! I called Bliss to find out where the hell she was and she told me she had to stop back by her house to pick up her shit and she’d be there. A call to Sandra informs us that the Scott makeover is nearly complete and they are stopping by Target and will be back shortly. She also tells us that we have to be at BE by 10:30 or we’ll loose our table. Well, its about 5:30 now so even though 4 of us need to get ready to go, we’ve got plenty of time and decide to just leisurely get ourselves together. Angy and Drea’s dinner arrives followed shortly by Bliss. We eat, we drink coffee, we admire the dress that Bliss found and just basically shoot the shit for awhile. Since Angy and D had their hair did they made good use of the bathtub and once that was done the actual getting ready rituals commenced. By the time it got around to doing my make-up I was in no mood so Bliss came and did it for me, cuz she rocks like that! After some debate it was decided amongst the group that I should wear bangs that night so I had to re-do my hair. We sat around talking for awhile, but were starting to get the-sat here too long doing nothing fade- around 9:30 so we called Scott and the girls to see if they were ready. They said 20 minutes and Bliss had to go to the ATM so we decided to head downstairs. Bliss and D head off to find the ATM while Angy gets more room keys made (we are forever losing room keys!) and I just hang about the lobby looking hot. When Angy gets the keys we head up to the casino to try and find Bliss and D....they’re making their way back from the ATM on the opposite side of the casino, so a quick call to Scott and the girls finds their lying asses are still 20 minutes away from being ready. We tell them we’ll meet them in the casino by the escalator. Angy and I plunk down in front of some penny slots to wait and we’re soon joined by D and Bliss. Right then a cw comes by and we decide to order some booze so we put a few bucks into our machines. Angy immediately doubles her $10 buy-in and says to me, “If I quit now I can honestly say I’ve doubled my gambling money.” Eh, we’ve still got time to kill so we slowly play our credits down hoping that Scott and the girls will show up soon. Bliss actually won some money so that was a score. Finally! Scott and the girls make an appearance and all three of them were SMOKING HOT! We head downstairs to grab a limo to the Hard Rock and since none of us girls were wearing coats it was NHO city! We hop in the limo and in no time we’re piling out at HR. We wander over to the circle bar to get some booze as we’re still waiting on D’s friend J to arrive and BC is nowhere to be found yet either. Its now well after 10:30 and I ask Sandra what’s gonna happen when we’re late. That bitch informs me we don’t have to be there until 11, but she just told us half an hour earlier so WE wouldn’t be late getting ready. AS IF! Our group finally comes together and we head on over to BE. I told Sandra who relayed the message to whoever it needed to be relayed to that they would have to walk Scott into the club BEFORE they took us in, because I could just see them leaving him outside after the walked the table of 9 girls in. I don’t think they were happy about that, but they did it. So after Scott went in (or so we thought) we proceeded inside. We had a group pic taken by someone from somewhere and then we were led through the bowels of BE to a table in the way-back exile room. Okay.....then we see that they stuck us right next to a table of like 12 guys and gave us only enough booth space for about 4 people. Needless to say we were NOT HAPPY. And neither were the 12 guys who were already there because they had to share “their” space. Whatever. After being told there were no other tables available and talking to about 8 different people we finally get moved to our rightful place...a huge table right off the dance floor. After this, all was right with the world. Well, at least my world. So we’re drinking and we’re dancing and we’re drinking and we’re drinking and we’re dancing and we even got Scott to get up and shake his groove thing! Fun is had, boys are oogled,....life was good. And then I look over at Scott...he wasn’t feeling as good as I was at that time. I asked him if he was cool and tried to get him to drink water, but he refused and just made himself a Jaeger bomb. Okay. So I’m drinking and I’m dancing and I’m drinking and I look over at Scott....he don’t look so good. I ask him if he’s cool and try to get him to drink some water, but he refuses and makes himself a Jaeger bomb. Okay. So we’re drinking and we’re dancing and we’re drinking and we’re drinking and we’re dancing and I look over at Scott...he REALLY doesn’t look so good. I ask him if he’s cool and try to get him to drink some water, but he refuses and makes himself a Jaeger bomb. Okay then. So we’re drinking and we’re drinking and we’re drinking and we’re dancing and I look over at Scott....its getting pretty ugly over there. I tell him I’ll take him home, but he refuses. I try to get him to drink some water, but he refuses and makes himself a Jaeger bomb. Not Good. I didn’t see him drink that one though. During this time, I get a text from Sandra saying she needs to go back to the room. I text back to find out where she is and she says upstairs. Okay. I tell BC that her girl needs help and she’s upstairs. BC says okay and I don’t see her again so I figure she went to take care of Sandra. So we’re drinking and we’re drinking and we’re dancing and I look over at Scott who is passed out. Way Not Good. I rouse him and hand him a glass of water which I don’t think he took more than 2 sips of. I tell him I’ll take him back to the room, but he refuses. Alright-y then! Shortly after that a bouncer comes by and tells us we need to get the passed out guy out of here or we’ll all have to leave. Bummer. I rouse Scott who still refuses to leave and seems as though he’s with it enough to at least stay awake so I go back to drinking and dancing until the bouncer comes back by and Scott’s passed out. Okay I’ve got to take him back now or we’re all gonna get the boot. I ask him to leave, he refuses so I have to pull out the guilt and I tell him if he doesn’t leave they’ll kick us all out and he’ll ruin everyone’s night. Mean, but effective as he finally agrees to leave. As we’re headed upstairs I spy Sandra in an unhappy place. So I grab onto her and help her get her shoes off and me and the two derailments head out to get a ride back to PH. Amazingly no one wants to take us home because of the obvious looming puke fest so I finally get some guy in an Excursion to agree to take us if I don’t let any puke get in his vehicle and I pay him $100. At that point I had no choice so I get Sandra and Scott loaded in and we head off. That was a fun ride and I will leave the details up to your imagination. We arrive at the hotel and get them “settled” in their room. I run back to our room to change shoes (my feet were dying!) and then head back out to the cab line to go back to BE. I’m halfway there when Bliss informs me the are in Planet Daileys at PH so I have the cabbie double back and meet them there. Now here’s the best part. Our waiter that morning was the 23 year old that tried to molest Angy in the Heart Bar the night before. Oh that was good for ever so much mean fodder. Drea had his ass running around like a hamster in a fucking exercise wheel. Every time he’d leave she was screaming his name until he came running back then she’d make him go get something and tell him he’d better run. Man that was hilarious. We chowed down and...Oh wait...I forgot about Drea’s baby daddy! HOLY SHIT that boy was F-I-N-E! Okay...back to the story. We chowed down and then the 5 of us (D’s friend was in no condition to be driving home) head up to the room where we get jammies on, order a bed for J and just shoot the shit for awhile. D is first out and she’s snoring loudly so I drunk-text a bunch of people that she’s snoring because we thought it was funny. Bliss and J both crash about the same time while Angy and I stay up talking for a little while longer (is anyone surprised???). It was a pretty early evening for us as I think we were asleep by 7:30 a.m. Around 9:30 I woke up for no good reason and could not go back to sleep. I pulled the desk chair into the bathroom and hung out in there drinking copious amounts of water, smoking, reading my book and texting furiously with many of you crazies. Bliss eventually got up and headed home to pick up her daughter and I was again on my own, just hanging out in the bathroom. J got up and figured out how she was going to get back to her car and D got up to hang with her until her ride came, so I had some company for awhile, but as soon as J left D crashed again so I just hung out in the bathroom for awhile longer until Angy got up and hung around in the bathroom with me until D eventually got up. It was time for food so we ordered room service and started to pack up. I was leaving and D and Angy we’re switching hotels. Sandra and MizzKittie came by to get Sandra’s purse that she’d left at the club and say goodbye. Food came and we chowed down and then Scott showed up to watch the GB game with us. I set the VMB record for fastest shower ever as I was in and out in under 1 minute (without washing my hair of course) beating Angy’s normal shower time of 2 minutes handily. I finished getting my crap packed as the girls got ready to head off to see Lenny. Just as the game went into OT it was time for me to head to the airport, so I said my goodbyes and grabbed a cab. It was a really great trip. I had so much fun and I am ready to do it all over again in March!