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Earl’s First Vegas Trip: June 30-July 7, 2010

Discussion in 'Vegas Trip Reports' started by Not at the table Carlos, Apr 22, 2020.

  1. Not at the table Carlos

    Not at the table Carlos Cheapskate

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    Beth followed us and met Sarah and Ashley....."What the hell? Is that a trophy??? Where did you find that?"

    "We won it!"

    We did the whole spelling bee routine again to the tune of a couple of giggles. "Can we get our picture with the champs?"

    The champs. That had a nice ring to it. "Wendal...tonight....WE ARE THE CHAMPS!"

    IMG_4163.JPG

    Sarah, Beth, Earl, Ashley, Wendal

    The Beaver girls informed us that there was a 9:00 fireworks show at Caesars Palace. That was only about 15 minutes from now. We proceeded out onto the sidewalk in front of Flamingo in anticipation of fireworks. Holy....Cow.....

    There must have been 20 people that stopped us to take a picture with "The Champs." It got down right hilarious. Every other person that walked by would compliment our trophy....

    "Congratulations!" "Badass trophy man" "Good job guys!!!" This was hysteric...BOOM!!!!!!

    (Do remember this was a digital camera...a POS one I'm sure)

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    The show lasted about 10-15 minutes. It was pretty cool. Now what??? Earl had a plan....
     
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  2. Not at the table Carlos

    Not at the table Carlos Cheapskate

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    After the fireworks show, I decided I needed to make things happen.....by gum, I was going to figure out a way to get laid on this trip, and Beth was not going to be the reason I didn't. She wanted to gamble? Let's fucking gamble! I suggested to the group, "Let's go play craps at Bill's." Wendal was of course on board. Beth was on board. Sarah and Ashley were fine with it, as they didn't know anything about gambling except that slot machine over on the wall adjacent to Flamingo Road.

    Before we could even get to the craps table....a man stopped us from getting that far. As soon as we entered Bill's Gamblin' Hall....YOOOOOOO!!!!

    "I need a picture with the champs!" Of all of the people that wanted a picture...this guy was the most adamant about it. Sure pal....anything for a fan!

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    Now that he let us go...we could go back to my plan...craps table......wait a second.....no way......YES! IT IS!!!!

    A CLEMSON FAN!!!!! Oh wow.....and what a Clemson fan. For those of you that don't know ANYthing about Clemson, South Carolina......it is a very rural area. Most people call it Auburn, Alabama with a lake. If the University didn't exist, neither would the town. In fact, the infamous scenes from Deliverance were filmed about 20 minutes from campus. Don't get me wrong....campus is beautiful. After all....there's something in those hills. But you can find some SERIOUS white trash Clemson fans without looking too hard. Welp....we found one.

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    Let's see....Cowboy hat? Check. Mullet? Check. Cutoff sleeve t-shirt? Check. Budweiser? Check. Cigarette in mouth? Check.

    VMB....Meet Martin Nacerra. Martin grew up an hour from Clemson in a town called Greenwood. I have come to know Martin very well. Not only did we meet him, and take photos with him that night.....365 days later....we saw Martin in that very same location in Bill's! He remembered us, and of course we remembered him. Since this night in 2010, I have hung out with Martin 5 or 6 times. He no longer hangs out on the strip because he has been 86'd from most of the casinos. He is a Land Surveyor in town, Motley Crue superfan, and part-time drummer. You can actually find YouTube videos of him singing karaoke at Bill's if you look hard enough. He's a man with a super heart, and we talk on the phone every few months when he drinks enough to warrant a phone call. God bless you Martin!

    This still doesn't solve the problem of....I need to be hanging out with this chick that's interested in me....without Beth hanging around tonight.



    I told Sarah and Ashley...hey if y'all (we say that in South Carolina) want to play a slot machine, we won't be long playing craps. So they went over to a slot machine, likely feeling dejected. We posted up at the craps table at Bill's, and the trophy posted up with us.
     
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  3. Not at the table Carlos

    Not at the table Carlos Cheapskate

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    We finally pull up to a craps table around 10:00. Remember, Wendal and I are still novices ourselves...but we have played enough this week to know most of what goes on at craps tables. We still stick to the $5 pass line and the occasional $6 6 and 8 bets. But we have discovered odds bets, hardways, other place bets, field bets...and I've heard people make hop bets. Still not sure what a come/don't come bet is at this point, or horn high/low. So we slowly explain the pass line wager to Beth. She's so excited to gamble, she throws $100 on the table like shes throwing it at Channing Tatum's crotch. We are having a pretty good time, as the dice come around to Beth. You know what they say about virgin shooters, and she didn't disappoint. I remember winning like $30 off of her first roll.....which was a pretty damn good roll for me back then. Remember I had very limited bets, as I only brought $500 in cash for booze, gambling, and food for the week. I had made enough from poker the other night to still have a couple hundred bucks with me.

    Her roll ended, and the dice passed on. Wendal finally needed to use the bathroom. Time to execute my plan. I could still see Sarah and Ashley playing their slot machine up against the wall, so I knew my plan could still work. I met Wendal in the bathroom and said....come on man...let's split.

    I had grabbed Wendal's small stack of red chips on my way to the bathroom, and we cashed out and headed to the slots that our ladies were playing at. Around 11:00 we left Bill's and headed south down the strip.
     
  4. Not at the table Carlos

    Not at the table Carlos Cheapskate

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    The next picture in the digital camera is this one taken at 11:45pm. This picture is taken inside NYNY casino. Wendal is posing with Ashley. Ashley had been drinking a LOT. She is shitfaced as all hell for pretty much the rest of this story, as evidenced by these pictures. Now...as you look at this picture of Wendal and Ashley together...you may notice that Wendal's mouth looks like he sucked off Elmo.

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    Ashley, meanwhile, couldn't find the camera. This would be a common theme the rest of the night. However we do see the culprit of Wendal's red mouth in the next photo...

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    He had bought one of those (As Stone Cold Steve Austin would call it) "One of those fruity piles of shit" drinks from Paris...while Ashley was doing Michael Jackson moves just trying to stay vertical.

    The next photo is taken around 12:30am...so it seems like we made a quick trip south to NYNY, and made our way back north towards Paris. But we couldn't resist taking a picture with a cop car. "Hey Earl....let's pose with the trophy in front of this cop car." Ashley took that as a perfect opportunity to grind her ass up against a cop car. To each their own. It seemed less and less likely that Wendal was going to get anywhere with Ashley....but he was a damn fine babysitter that night!

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  5. Not at the table Carlos

    Not at the table Carlos Cheapskate

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    After passing Paris again, we take the bridge over Flamingo Road, which leads us down the probably broken escalator into Bill's. We cut through Bill's because it's so frigging hot outside even though it's almost 1:00am. As we cut through, Wendal and I spot Beth at the same craps table we left her at over 3 hours ago! I start to say something to her, but before I can open my mouth...she's busy tossing 6-4 on the hop, and odds for her come bet on the 5! What the hell???? She's got like $500 in her rack with the entire table chanting her name!!!!! Hell...thata girl, Beth.

    Anyway, we kept on towards Flamingo, and as we went inside....the natural thing for Wendal and me to do was to make our way towards the elevators. No protests from either of the ladies with us. Nice!

    There we are....the four of us waiting on the elevators to go up to the sacred 19th floor. It was going to happen....I was going to get laid in Vegas. I could almost hear the Song of Time playing in my mind from Ocarina of Time on Nintendo 64. DING! Elevator doors open.....HEY!!!!! CHI CHI!!!!!

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    True Flamingo fans will notice "Burger Joint" in the background. Now it's Center Cut steakhouse. Boy I miss Burger Joint. It was so cool to bump into Chi Chi again.

    ***Side note...I wouldnt see Chi Chi again until July 4th 2016. Once again at Flamingo! I was in Vegas with my wife's entire family celebrating her younger brother's 21st birthday. Chi Chi was at the pool and I recognized him immediately...mainly from the wristbands. You can find more details in my 2016 trip report.

    Back to the task at hand....we go up the elevators, and get off on our appropriate floor. That may seem like an easy task...but getting off on your correct floor was a decent job for us at this point. We are all pretty hammered. We open the door to our room....and clearly the drunkest person in the room is poor ole Ashley. We crack open a beer that we had kept on ice in our trusty "cooler."

    It's at this point, where I wonder how we will both hook up with girls at the same time in the same room....but before I could even consider a good plan...Ashley says she's going back downstairs. Wendal insists he escort her down. This leaves Sarah and me in the room alone. We start to make out, but before this can turn into a creepy ass sex story....she stops pretty quickly and says...

    "Sorry, I really should check on my friend." I agree 100% and for every good reason possible, I get thrown out rounding second base. We go search for Wendal and Ashley.

    We finally find them outside....with Ashley screwing around with a passed out guy on a bench....

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    Sarah decides she needs to escort her friend back to the hotel room. She receives no arguments from Wendal and me. Poor girl's had enough for one night. We say our goodbyes, and Wendal and I stumble back to Flamingo. This would end our 4th of July celebration in Las Vegas. Day 5 has come to an end. Still, Earl has not been laid. Two more days remain.

    Next post, July 5, 2010
    Day 6:
     
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  6. mike honcho

    mike honcho Low-Roller

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    As much as i enjoyed the night you had ...I kinda wish you had stayed at the craps table with beth on that heater...And now i am catching up on some of your old trip reports,Even the great royal flusher gave you props in one i am reading now. Your trip reports are up there with tdhoir(?), and royal flusher. You tell a great tale and lay out the action well. I appreciate the time taken to do it. Cheers. And being a sc guy you ever been to chicken lickin?
     
    Last edited: Apr 26, 2020
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  7. Packbacker

    Packbacker Low-Roller

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    Dude.....epic. Always wondered where the nicknames came from. Can't wait to read more and hope to catch up with you in Vegas again one day!
     
  8. bshowell

    bshowell VIP Whale

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    This is an epic, epic first trip. Can't wait for the rest.
     
    Oh yes
    One more
  9. sybgal

    sybgal VIP Whale

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    Lovin' this just like all your reports....too-too funny!
     
  10. Not at the table Carlos

    Not at the table Carlos Cheapskate

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    July 5, 2010
    Day 6:

    I don’t think my body has ever forgiven me for the summer of 2010. With it being the end of my first year of teaching frigging high school students....giving me two months of 100% free time while also getting paid....well let’s just say this Vegas Trip wasn’t the beginning of my binge.....but it sure as shit was the peak.

    I remember both of us sleeping in until at least 11:30 that Monday morning. The week was starting to catch up with us. I slowly pulled myself together, as these hangovers are something I’m beginning to be accustomed to. I turned on old faithful, the digital camera and the last picture of the night....Heh, looks like I messed with passed out Wendal.

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    That day we didn’t go get shitfaced at the pool. We didn’t go harassing young women in bikinis. That day we decided to stroll down Las Vegas Boulevard. We headed northbound on the east side of the road, and the first place we came to that I had not been to yet was Venetian. I remember thinking that was the most impressive shit I had ever seen being inside. We walked in the asshole heat of Vegas in July down to Riviera. We played maybe 5 minutes of blackjack/roulette in there, and so glad I did. I can say I gambled in the Riviera, as I would never set foot inside again. It’s a chip I’m missing from my collection that I sure wish I had.

    We check out inside Circus Circus and Slots a Fun before eventually reaching Stratosphere . We pondered going to the top but decided against it. From Flamingo, Stratosphere didn’t look all that far. Holy hell was I wrong.

    We trekked back south and made it to Bill’s...our home away from home. Sweating our little balls off, we decide to split a pitcher of Coors Light. My bankroll was dwindling, but Wendal was doing pretty well. That huge pot in poker helped, but he kept consistently coming out slightly ahead at the Craps tables. Once we started on that first beer.....well you can probably guess where this is going. We had back to the room, but not before getting a picture with KISS!

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    Last edited: Apr 27, 2020
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  11. Not at the table Carlos

    Not at the table Carlos Cheapskate

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    We had Bud Light cans in the room....but we forgot to put ice in the “cooler” before our journey into the desert earlier! Wendal has just showered, and seeing as how we needed these beers to get cold in a hurry, there was no time to waste getting dressed before going to get ice.

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    Wendal makes a run for it!!!

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    Thanks to our hero’s efforts, within 30 minutes, we start drinking some of our Oasis Water that is Bud Light.

    Beth is texting us to see what we want to do. They are all cool with whatever. We suggest meeting downstairs and seeing where the night takes us (hopefully back to a hotel room with Kate).

    It was around 9:30 and Beth says Kate and Courtney are just waking up from a nap. She says she’s heading to Bill’s for some Craps. Atta girl, Beth! After a couple more beers, we decide to head over there to play too.

    “Hey Earl, you think we should take the trophy with us again?”

    “.......I suppose it does need some fresh air.”

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    Earl, some bachelorette, and Beth hang out with the trophy again.
     
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  12. Not at the table Carlos

    Not at the table Carlos Cheapskate

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    The time stamps on pictures shows that we played Craps for a solid two hours. I’m not sure how we did that night, but it appears that we have evolved as Craps players and now are playing odds.

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    Must have been pretty good. The 4 and 8 have already been hit by the shooter as evidenced by the fire bet pucks (RIP Fire bet). Also Wendal has $15 odds bet down! That’s unheard of for him at that point! I’m assuming that’s our $6 6 too.

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    Everybody loves the “Ass Line.”

    It appears we cashed out around 1:00am. This was because I remember Kate and Courtney’s lame asses finally showing up. Beth has been discussing during our Craps session how they have not wanted to do hardy ANYthing in the trip. She was pretty disappointed, but was thankful we helped her learn to gamble.

    This was a South Carolina Gamecock fan we met at the table. He wanted us to put up a chicken wing for the picture. Ugh. Man I’m glad Clemson has beaten them 6 times in a row now....

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    For some reason Beth demanded that the security guard at Drai’s thumb wrestle her. So maybe we can some drinks while playing Craps. I believe the three of us all had been ordering straight Jack. Uh oh....is shit about to get ugly for us?

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    Looks like Beth also ordered a daiquiri to go.

    Here is the last picture before things get ridiculous....Kate and Courtney finally breaking out of their shell and having some fun as a bachelor party gives them a round of applause. I’m telling you...that trophy was a GOOD decision. We headed over LV BLVD using WORKING escalators....and took her hammered selves into Caesars Palace.....what could go wrong?
     
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  13. Not at the table Carlos

    Not at the table Carlos Cheapskate

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    At this point, I’m not even sure if Kate and Courtney are with us at this point. I have no recollection of their existence after that picture of them with the trophy.

    However from this point on.....all I can say is....

    WOW!

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    [​IMG]
     
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  14. Not at the table Carlos

    Not at the table Carlos Cheapskate

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    I have no clue who the guy is in those pictures above. All I know is he was pumped up on something strong, and within about 60 seconds of taking pictures with him, he started doing pull-ups on Caesar’s arm....causing security to rush the scene. They tried kicking all of us out, but we said we had no idea who that guy was. They let us stay.

    We figured it was time to leave that establishment anyway. The group suggestion was to find some food at Flamingo.

    Before the story continues back across the street to Flamingo....I have one last picture from Caesars at 2:00am. It’s been dubbed “The Money Shot......”
     
  15. Not at the table Carlos

    Not at the table Carlos Cheapskate

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    [​IMG]
     
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  16. Not at the table Carlos

    Not at the table Carlos Cheapskate

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    Soooooo, around 2:00am we check out Burger Joint next to the pool elevators. After scoping out the menu, they had $4 Steak and Eggs, but $2 Burger and fries....

    Damn what a deal!

    Wenda couldn’t decide between which meal he wanted.....so of course he ordered both. I don’t think I could describe Wendal’s ability to put down food at that point in history. I once saw him down 3 foot longs at Subway in one sitting.

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    While waiting on the food, we saw our old pal Joe from the pool from a few days ago.

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    Joe came and sat down with us. Wendal ordered him a $2 Burger and fries, so Joe had no choice but to hang out a while. Joe, also being a VT grad, talked with Beth about Hokie football.

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    Wendal indeed conquered Burger Joint. While we waited for our checks, I handed Wendal a $10 and said...

    “Pay for mine for me, I’m gonna run up to the room and put the trophy up. It’s had its fun for the night.”

    When Beth chimed in...”Want me to come with you?”
     
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  17. FormallyTD

    FormallyTD Big Time

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    Great stuff, Earl...an even better memory.

    I'm glad to read the last part because I can't figure out why you wouldn't boink Beth.
     
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  18. tringlomane

    tringlomane STP Addicted Beer Snob

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    Really great read!
     
  19. Not at the table Carlos

    Not at the table Carlos Cheapskate

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    While I hear it’s impolite to kiss and tell....of course Beth escorted me up to the 19th floor. Good thing I needed to take that trophy back up to the room, right? I know everybody is going to want the details of what happened in the room.

    We put the trophy back.

    Okay, so there may have been more going on than just putting the damn trophy in the room. Let’s just say, the girl knew what she was doing....and she did her best vacuum cleaner impression. As far as I’m concerned her name is Beth Hoover.

    After the deed is done....dirt cheap....we both make our way back down the lone working elevator to the lobby to find Wendal. We end up seeing him towards the Margaritaville section of Flamingo (Don’t think that existed back then, but in that vicinity).

    This is a funny story. Somehow the topic of conversation in the few minutes we met back with Wendal, was he can fit his entire fist in his mouth....

    “Beth I’m SURE you cou......um nevermind.”

    She rolls her eyes...”I can do it too!”

    [​IMG]

    Well then. Wendal is pretty astonished...”My god, Beth!!! I bet you could fit MY fist in your mouth!”

    “Wendal, NO!!!!”

    Okay....I did stop it before this occurred. But it definitely almost happened. Wendal didn’t realize where that mouth had been not 15 minutes ago.

    Well that pretty much ends day 6. Beth must have escorted us gentlemen to our room....because I have this picture here....and I have no explanation. Wendal in his undies with Beth in the elevator? Guys I have no idea.

    [​IMG]

    Beth has an early flight, so she may or may not have gone to bed. I just hope she brushed her teeth.

    Next post: July 6, 2010
    Day 7....Final Day
     
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  20. Not at the table Carlos

    Not at the table Carlos Cheapskate

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    July 6, 2010
    Day 7:

    For some reason I slept better that night than any other night so far. I can’t imagine what the reason might be. Oh well. Wendal and I had a 7:00am flight the next day, so we had to determine what we wanted to do. Should we try to call it a night early and give our poor livers a break? Should we live it up our last day in Vegas and crash on the pl....poor choice of words. Should we pass out once boarding the plane?

    After lunch we decided that we should just soak in Vegas as much as we could. We agreed to give up on the chase for women that day. There’s so much more to do and see out there....we had 6 days at it, and we both got a little bit of action. Sorry to disappoint the readers out there.

    Wendal had eaten In n Out Burger on his trip the previous year, so we took a cab to the In n Out on Tropicana behind NYNY. GOOOOOOD! The fries honestly aren’t great, but I don’t think I knew of “animal style” at that point.

    I surprisingly don’t recall exactly what we did that day. The only picture I have from the day is one of my favorites. This setup is now found in Fremont Street, but this picture was taken where Carnival Court is.

    *A Stranger Admires Wendal’s Big Balls*

    [​IMG]

    I would imagine the day was filled with walking around the strip. I recall finally walking around Caesars Palace sober and getting lost. I also recall wandering through Paris and into Bally’s. Las Vegas had captured me on this trip. Gambling can be done anywhere. I had never truly gambled before. The only casino within 7 hours of us back home was Harrah’s Cherokee, and at the time, it had no live cards or table games.

    It was the architecture, the overall exciting interaction of people, and the no open container law helped too. People are totally open to meeting people and making friends in that city....even locals like Martin from Bill’s.

    That evening we were walking through Bill’s and decided to go ahead and split a pitcher of Coors. As we are finishing it up, four absolutely gorgeous women are posted up at the bar next to us. My instincts were to obviously begin conversation, but after our discussion that morning, I just kept drinking my final cup of beer. Wendal and I decided to walk to Flamingo for some poker.

    We couldn’t help ourselves, as we both say hi as we walk by these women. They immediately engage us in conversation. They are flight attendants that are here for the night before flying out around noon the next day.

    “What are you ladies getting into tonight?”

    “Nothing. Probably just drinking until we pass out.”

    [​IMG]
     
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