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BeeeJay & Borat's "BOOM BABY Off-The-Rails" April 2019 LIVE Vegas Trip Report

Discussion in 'Vegas Trip Reports' started by BeeeJay, Apr 25, 2019.

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  1. BeeeJay

    BeeeJay President of The Red Lobster Hostess Satisfaction

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    My Trip Report

    Hello Friends,

    Another April has arrived with that familiar Jim Nance refrain as the elderly athletes limp down Magnolia Lane, but lest we forget, back in his hay day, Tiger had another "Tradition Unlike Any Other". Yep you guessed it, he loved nothing more than to celebrate another major win by flying to Vegas and going OFF THE RAILS with Hookers & Blow!!!!

    [​IMG]

    Borat & BeeeJay may not be as adept at stroking their extended-length putters as Tiger, but the comeback story is no less compelling after a BRUTAL Lobster-Fest season where surviving the flying cocktail and tarter sauces and avoiding a death by impaling on a forked lemon is a MAJOR VICTORY in itself!!!

    So here we are. As the April flowers blossom and revival is in the air, BeeeJay & Borat are ready to step to the first tee. Or maybe the first tea-bagging. Either way. Just like the Masters patrons enjoy too many of Augusta's famed Peach Ice Cream Sandwiches, we will saturate our livers to the edge of human athletic performance in Peach Ciroc.

    The flight check-in has just been completed. Final packing is well underway. Borat heads out in just a few short hours, with BeeeJay to follow at the crack of dawn tomorrow morning.

    Due to a long winning streak and a new specially-designed Pavlovian system of rewards wherein we received a special bonus for every satisfied Red Lobster Hostess, our bankrolls are slobbering like a dog outside Big Ben at High Noon with a veritable pork-belly of extra cash earmarked for debauchery and shenanigans this trip!!

    Borat will be driving from Phoenix and picking me up at around 10am Friday morning.

    We have secured comped accommodations at Aria for the weekend. The plan is to hit the pool upon arrival and drink to complete "off-the-rails" excess. We have a 6pm reservation for Lemongrass to insure a base of solid food to absorb some of the alcohol and keep us upright for an evening of CHUCKY FORESKINS and Row 802 Handys!!!

    We have a meet up with a special guest star at Cosmo around 10pm Friday, and plan to hit @Gaggles new progressive dealt royal machine.

    Saturday itinerary is early wakeup to secure PRIME pool spots, a classic Wynn Shitter Walk, hitting Cosmo sportsbook bar and the new Palazzo bartops en route for a cocktail at each. Followed by a shot on my favorite Encore Deuces Wild by the Red Card desk while Borat finished defiling Mr. Wynn's Golden Toilet. The goal is to be back at Aria pool around the time breakfast opens, and spend the entire day again getting semi-grey-out drunk, you know, just drunk enough that WE THINK we are cool talking to the young Instagram bikini models at the pool! (of course all the while knowing we are really being barely tolerated by Golden Girls bachelorette parties in town for their 7th weddings). We have a dinner reservation at 6pm at Jean Georges Steakhouse, again followed by a night of out-of-control gambling, primarily at Aria.

    Sunday is a carbon copy of Saturday, except we will definitely RAMP UP the day drinking. And dinner is at Javiers for Mexican. Sunday will draw to a close with a special trip to Bellagio to meet up with another famed VMB guest star!

    Monday we will hit our traditional Aria or Bellagio breakfast buffet mid-Wynn Shitter Walk, just hoping to escape the circular reference buffet-shitter cycle in time to make our way out of town by mid-day.

    So please join us for this "Trip For The Ages" as it has been a solid 6-months since our last foray and we are motivated like never before to stretch the bounds of human athletic achievement and show the world one last time that our livers are not quite yet ready for the Senior Tour!!!
     
    Last edited: Apr 25, 2019
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  2. Matty Ice

    Matty Ice High-Roller

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    A BeeeJay trip report! [​IMG]
     
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  3. Flopitbaby

    Flopitbaby Low-Roller

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    SWEET ! Cannot wait.
     
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  4. imjbs

    imjbs Tourist

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    May your livers survive!!! I'll be following along . . .
     
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  5. BeeeJay

    BeeeJay President of The Red Lobster Hostess Satisfaction

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    First win of the trip, procured my lucky seat!!!

    [​IMG]
     
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  6. UKFanatic

    UKFanatic The Arbiter of Taste Caviar Kid

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    I get to Aria monday night, so it looks like I will just miss you all. Have a blast! Will be following along to get me ready
     
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  7. BeeeJay

    BeeeJay President of The Red Lobster Hostess Satisfaction

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    Oh man! Sorry to miss you! I guess you will overlap with our Sunday "surprise VMB royalty guest" however!
     
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  8. bshowell

    bshowell VIP Whale

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    Yay! Should be some epicness in this thread.
     
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  9. grosx2

    grosx2 Have fun storming the castle!

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    This day just went up about 20 notches.
     
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  10. Hogman

    Hogman VIP Whale

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    You guys have a great time!!!!. Every time I pass by the Red Lobster on my way to work, I wonder where in the heck you have been.!!!!!
     
    Park MGM with 3x TC
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  11. Vegasworm

    Vegasworm Finger Clicker Extraordinaire

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    Excited to see how your livers hold up! Have a great trip, you guys have good stuff planned!

    Good luck!
    Vegasworm
     
    Our Family's First Vegas Thanksgiving (If I Don't Back Out)!
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  12. Lovegas95

    Lovegas95 High-Roller

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    Awesome! No one can do Row 802 like you do...see what I did there? Have a blast. Following.
     
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  13. john1516inny

    john1516inny Low-Roller

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    Great to have you back! Did you enjoy BahaMar, never heard about that one, lol. Can't wait for this report!!
     
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  14. BeeeJay

    BeeeJay President of The Red Lobster Hostess Satisfaction

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    I enjoyed the heck out of Baha Mar....a few highlights while Vegas awaits....

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  15. john1516inny

    john1516inny Low-Roller

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    nice!! both the hotel and royal!!
     
  16. grosx2

    grosx2 Have fun storming the castle!

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    Fireball swim trunks ftw!!
     
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  17. BeeeJay

    BeeeJay President of The Red Lobster Hostess Satisfaction

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    Actually bought two pairs as I tend to lose these things
     
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  18. BeeeJay

    BeeeJay President of The Red Lobster Hostess Satisfaction

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    All set for guaranteed early check-in and pool weather looks ideal!!!

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  19. NCAAHoops

    NCAAHoops High-Roller

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    Just made Friday at work....A Great Day!!! Tiger got a green jacket but you guys are taking down Aria
     
  20. BeeeJay

    BeeeJay President of The Red Lobster Hostess Satisfaction

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    Thank god I’m not home in Chicago this weekend....

    [​IMG]

     
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