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Bad joke of the day

Discussion in 'Non-Vegas Chat' started by wormhole, Jul 14, 2016.

  1. queuetee

    queuetee High-Roller

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    A modern cheerleader who ----like every female athlete in today's world---has been waxed.
     
    • Funny Funny x 2
    • Wow! Wow! x 1
  2. JJLV

    JJLV Low-Roller

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    LOL texted hubby again without answer to have him guess. He texted back a Brazilian nfl cheerleader. Yep
     
  3. JJLV

    JJLV Low-Roller

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    *Isn't it ironic*

    Truck.jpg
     
    • Funny Funny x 3
  4. Richard Alpert

    Richard Alpert LOST

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    My guidance counselor never told me that the road to success had clearance considerations to be aware of!
     
    An "Egg-citing" Pre-Easter Trip!
  5. yooperguy

    yooperguy Low-Roller

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    What can you eat on toast, that you can't eat on pussy??'

    Crust
     
    4TH ANNUAL WSOP 2019 EXTRAVAGANZA
    30th Wedding Anniversary Trip
  6. NYNYGirl

    NYNYGirl VIP Whale

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    Whatdid the blonde say to her doctor when she found out she was pregnant?....

    Are you sure it's mine....
     
    Last edited: Aug 31, 2016
    • Funny Funny x 1
  7. pultzar

    pultzar Low-Roller

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    An American, an Australian, and a Chinese guy are all part of a new mining company. One day they land a contract to work on a new dig site in Brazil. The American is assigned to be in charge of the workers, the Australian in charge of drilling, and the chinese guy is in charge of the supplies. After a week of work, progress is being made but both the American and the Australian can't locate the Chinese guy anywhere. The are concerned and begin a mass search of the entire site. After failing to locate him outside the mine, the search begins in the shaft. As they are reaching the end of the mine shaft, they round a corner and from behind a cart the Chinese guy jumps out and yells "Supplies!"
     
    • Like Like x 3
  8. gotChopin

    gotChopin Low-Roller

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    Hahaha!! Gotta use this one! !
     
  9. wormhole

    wormhole VIP Whale

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    A recent study showed that women who carry a little extra weight tend to live longer than the men who comment on it.
     
    • Like Like x 3
    • Agree Agree x 1
  10. The Stig

    The Stig VIP Whale

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    My father wants me to get a organ donor card, he's a man after my own heart
     
    • Funny Funny x 2
  11. PaulBowdry

    PaulBowdry Low-Roller

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    Confucius say epileptic woman who give bj may bite big one.
     
  12. CJ's

    CJ's Low-Roller

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    How does a constipated mathematician obtain relief?




    He works it out with a pencil o_O
     
  13. Edserv

    Edserv Low-Roller

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    He also say..."Man wit itchy butt have stinky finga"
     
  14. ace1020

    ace1020 Tourist

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    Priest and a Rabbi are sitting on a park bench when a little boy walks by. The Priest says want to f**k him? The Rabbi says sure, out of what?
     
    • Wow! Wow! x 1
  15. The Stig

    The Stig VIP Whale

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    A guy has been on a desert island for a year and as he sat on the beach he see's a somebody walking out of the water. He thinks it's a mirage but as they get closer he see's it's a young woman in a wet suit.
    The woman comes up to him and asks the guy if he wants a smoke. The guy answers yes and she pulls the zip slightly down on her wetsuit and pulls out cigarettes and a lighter. As the guy is smoking she asks if he would like a drink. She pulls the zip down a little further and pulls out a bottle of whiskey.
    As the guy takes a drink the woman asks if he would like to play around as she pulls the zip on her wetsuit all the way down.
    The guy says don't' tell me you've got a set of golf clubs in there as well.
     
    • Funny Funny x 4
    • Like Like x 2
  16. abraxis

    abraxis Low-Roller

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    Confucius also say "man who walk through turnstile sideways going to 'bang-cock'"
     
    • Like Like x 1
  17. Richard Alpert

    Richard Alpert LOST

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    Or going to "Hacken-sack"
     
    Last edited: Sep 10, 2016
    An "Egg-citing" Pre-Easter Trip!
  18. flyguyfl

    flyguyfl VIP Whale

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    Birthdays are fun but statistics say too many will kill you.
     
    • Like Like x 1
  19. Richard Alpert

    Richard Alpert LOST

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    Speaking of statistics...I wanted to make a joke about averages, but that's just mean.
     
    An "Egg-citing" Pre-Easter Trip!
  20. flyguyfl

    flyguyfl VIP Whale

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    Speaking of averages, half your friends are below average.
     
    • Like Like x 1