Discussion in 'Vegas Trip Reports' started by tdhoier, Sep 27, 2017.
Hell yes. I was beginning to worry..Thought maybe you'd od'd or something cool like that.
UPM (United Pilot Man) landed the plane with relative ease at 9:25 PM PST.
I had Seat 8D (Aisle) and a nice enough lady sat in the middle seat between my brother and I. "Nice" in the sense that she was pleasant and meant well, but God Gummit if she wasn't annoying as all hell.
A) All three patrons get their own air vent, yes? With an hour left in the flight, this crazy ho turns my vent onto her (and her vent onto her) and asks, "Is it me, or did this plane suddenly get real hot?!?" Yeah, it did for me, mother f'er. Who does that.
B) I'm reading a book. Out of the blue, she turns to me and asks (loudly), "Are you going to one of those dispensaries?"
Do I look like I just took the Red Line in from Skid Row? I mean, of course I'm going to one, but it was so random and I found it an odd question to ask a total stranger...especially since I was reading 'Gringo' and I was deep into a chapter where this International Fugitive from America was boinking some Columbian Strippers.
Gold-Platinum-Noir Express Line wasn't operational here at the Mandalay Bays. I was not happy about this. It's about the only perk I like with this ridiculous program.
The little lady at the check-in was nice, though. Waived Resort Fees and gave me two complimentary passes to the f-ing Dolphin show at The Mirage...or 2 free rides on the roller coaster. Thanks! I'm high rollin' now.
Walked to room without any issues (it can be and has been a challenge in the past).
Immediately threw my 60 pound bag onto the bed to make sure my nectar didn't shatter in-flight. All six bottles safe and sound.
Opened up the vodka immediately.
Hoping Le Beau can get me Le Buzzed before I venture out. Have never tasted this liquid before and, I must say, whoever is responsible for milking these potatoes from the rolling hills of Fraancay is A-OK. I was breaking out in French upon my first sip. "Es Qui Bueno!"
Life is full of decisions.
What investments fit my financial goals?
What can I do to better my community?
Should I buy drugs from the Hispanic Guy I met at a restroom in Mandalay Place?
It's tough out there...so I'm unsure exactly what I'm going to do when I leave this room in ten minutes.
If I wander around the south end of the Strip or Monorail it down to Harrahs, walk to Wynn and walk back this way, we wear this:
If I want to be mellow and go down to the Double Down to see Stagnetti's Cock play...then maybe hit up the Hooters for some Blackjack and Pabst Blue Ribbons, I go with these guys:
I'll figure it out.
Wardrobe A but Option B. Alex
Never a dull moment at Double Down.
No energy to elaborate on the Air Force veteran, Saginaw MI or the Santa Fe native with Doub Ds
Just a random image from outside the bar and an apparent club across from Double Down (I'm all about judging people and the Freezone has some real fucking morons lingering about).
I should try to go in.
The Hard Rock got rid of the fucking guitar?
What else does this property have (aside from a Slayer visit every 18 months)?
This is an image never posted on Vegas Message Board.
I think it's open.
Can you imagine being a young child and ascending to see this Mecca?
Loving your trip report once again.
Great to see these off strip Dive Bars.
Thanks for posting.
Think the guitar sign was knocked off in Con Air when the Hard Rock was close to Circus Circus
My brothers band opened up for the Circle Jerks in 1985..Great show, They were on the "Wonderful" tour.
Great TR as as always sir. Please show bobs and vagene.
Fuck. Laughing so hard.
Ask for Jello Biafra shots.
New #1 on my bucket list! Apparently I've been doing Vegas all wrong!
I've accidentally been to a few happy bars, but never the happiest!
Even the drum set has to step out for a breather!
Or maybe that's for back door rimshots...
Ventured to the Hard Rock after drinking through about 4 songs by the Cock boys.
I went in there a couple years ago and wondered what happened to the property. Nothing has changed. Empty and they weren't even playing old Whitesnake tracks.
I sat at a Free bet Blackjack table and won $10 overall (again...I'm a High Roller, guys...it says it right under my avatar). I liked the dealer and a young African American woman sat down with me...giant D boulders being held up by some yarn attached to a fish net. She looked a lot like Milwaukee Bucks LEGEND Greg 'Cadillac' Anderson.
Took a cabbie to the MGM. Sat at a Pai Gow table.
I think they say that 'They're stereotypes because they're true.'. The two gentlemen at this table greeted me by saying, "Oh, what...we got a white boy over ear?" Two Italian brothers from Brooklyn and...it was just too easy. "What the fuck is this fuckin' game, ear?" At one point the big fella (standing) told the Asian Pit Boss, "Dis fuckin' game...it's bullshit. How you spose to win money in this fuckin' thing? I tell ya what...I'm goin' to play some American games over dare."
Won a smidge over $200. Had a really nice run, but lost my last two $75 hands.
Walked back to the Mandalay. Stopped in the Black Lung (Excal) because my drunk buddy in Colorado implored upon me..."I'm feeling 6 tonight, TD. Bubby Brister, TD.' Put $15 on 6 and the results are what they are.
On my way through the Luxor, I took a secret shortcut only us really smart veterans of the game know about and came across a young lady of the night. Drunk for two straight days (or 20 straight years, depending on how you look at it), it seemed she was a beautiful little Asian maiden. She said hello and I did the same while walking away. 50 feet later I thought I needed to go at least talk to her, so I did a U'ey and went back. Turns out she was mulatto (I was drunk and I'm blind)...but very cute.
I did nothing. It's too early into this trip to be diving into that Tom Foolery.
Back at Mandalay, saw my old nemesis.
I had dreams of $85 G at 4 AM. What a story to tell!
I lost 12 straight spins at $5 a clip, cashed out and did what all of my old girlfriends used to do....hit the machine and screamed "I hate you!"
Made a couple college football bets this morn. Most of my action will be on post 5 PM EST games.
Checking out soon enough. Best friend (Gary Busey) lands in a few hours and it's going to be a very ugly 36 hours.
This is true. We had a dual bachelorette party that started there. We managed to lose one bachelorette for the night, due to excessive Ass Juice and Bacon Martinis. Double Down tried to kill the other one in the bathroom with an unattached toilet seat. Good times.
Damn, that's funny! I can totally picture her/him!!!
Both Defensive Coordinators should be deported.
Retrieved the Audi & went to buy myself some reefer products.
For a job well done, I treated myself to some more Bona Fide, USDA Certified, Grade A vittles. I don't need your fancy schmancy restaurants, Las Vegas.
That's a 2 piece of some Lousiana spicy chicken, some mashed taters & a flaky biscuit, kids.
This place made the Manchu Wok look like a Taco truck in Guatemala.
My favorite beer and first Jackpot of the Trip. I thought I was havin an erotic dream when I gazed upon this price tag.
Great report---as usual. I googled Greg "Cadillac" Anderson. I have a good imagination---I can picture her!
Greg "Cadillac" Anderson!More references like that is what every TR needs!
tdhoier........the best writer on VMB. U-da-Man!!
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