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Columbus Day Pre-Trip Report

Discussion in 'Misc. Vegas Chat' started by Duke Always Covers, Sep 10, 2013.

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  1. Duke Always Covers

    Duke Always Covers Tourist

    Joined:
    Aug 6, 2012
    Messages:
    66
    Trips to Las Vegas:
    6
    Nostradamus, move over: Here is the report from my October trip that has not yet happened. Part wishful thinking, part pessimism based on previous experience, all anticipation. I will update after we return.

    Part I: SATURDAY
    1. On time early evening departure from ORD.
    2. Smooth flight and (more importantly) the elusive but essential pre-Vegas nap. Important given likely minimal sleep time in Vegas, but complicated by constant adrenaline rush at being on plane to Vegas.
    3. Reasonably efficient deplaning and airport navigation. I cannot possibly match the perfect storm of my 2010 trip, when from the jetway to the backseat of the cab I NEVER STOPPED MOVING (thanks to hopping on the airport tram just as the doors were closing and finding NO LINE at the cab stand) – but I’ll gladly settle for consistent forward progress.
    4. Short cab line at McCarran. No worries here, because it’ll be 8:30 on a Saturday night. Who needs a cab in Vegas at that hour?
    5. No long haul attempted. I will use my stentorian tones (or “big boy voice”) to command the driver to take Tropicana and NO TUNNEL.
    6. Short check-in line at Monte Carlo. Complication-free acquisition of MyVegas comped room.
    7. Figure out where the rest of my crew is. Hopefully they have anticipated my arrival and set up shop somewhere nearby and easily walkable. Last year at this point we were at Circus Circus, which meets neither criterion and also fails the “Provide a Logical Explanation For How You Ended Up There” test.
    8. Tearful reunion. After all, I won’t have seen these guys since YESTERDAY at work, and won’t have texted or called any of them for perhaps a QUARTER OF AN HOUR.
    9. Join in volatile, idiotic table games with crew. “House Edge Be Damned, 3 Card Poker Is A Game Of Skill” is our motto for this portion of the evening.
    10. Realize that 3 Card Poker is less a game of skill and more a heartless minx bent on our fiscal and psychological destruction. Switch to VP and Bud Light.
    11. Get a quad on the first night. Hell, get several. Hope I am not so bleary-eyed that I’m seeing, and holding, cards that do not technically exist, such as “P,” 13,” and the “Blob of Red” suit.
    12. Get to bed. Hopefully my own.
     
  2. Duke Always Covers

    Duke Always Covers Tourist

    Joined:
    Aug 6, 2012
    Messages:
    66
    Trips to Las Vegas:
    6
    PART II: SUNDAY

    13. Wake up early enough to sneak in some VP before placing NFL bets. Maybe even have a go at $1 BP – never played at that level. What could possibly go wrong?
    14. Drink coffee & Bailey’s (breakfast of champions) or vodka cranberries (to prevent scurvy). DO NOT switch from one to the other.
    15. Secure seats, with the rest of the crew, at the upstairs bar at Sporting House. Watch, and win on, Week 6 games with crew while playing VP (I believe Royal Flusher would call this “multigambletasking”).
    16. Cross a few casinos off the list of places I’ve never gambled. The Quad and Margaritaville are the most likely candidates this time around.
    17. Take a flyer at Ultimate X Poker. Convince others in the crew to join me. Work assiduously to repair friendships damaged after several crew members lose $200 in 8 minutes.
    18. Avoid getting dragged to Hooters at some point in the afternoon. We always seem to end up there, and then always wonder how the hell we ended up there.
    19. Head downtown for the Sunday night NFL game, and for the night in general.
    20. Go to Main Street Station (never been – why on earth would I WANT the best VP pay tables?). Play VP at the Boar’s Head bar.
    21. Get quads in as many downtown casinos as possible. I am, as of yet, un-quadded downtown. What is wrong with me?
    22. Eat a Binion’s burger at the counter. Convince my intestinal tract to accept it despite not having eaten red meat in a while.
    23. Play some craps with the crew.
    24. Bet the All Small/All Tall if available, and at least sniff a victory in one or t’other.
    25. Ride at least one hot roller and up my starting $5 bet to $25.
    26. Wander, stagger, stumble back to the Monte Carlo. Actually, I should probably take a cab.
     
  3. Duke Always Covers

    Duke Always Covers Tourist

    Joined:
    Aug 6, 2012
    Messages:
    66
    Trips to Las Vegas:
    6
    PART III: MONDAY

    27. Wake up early and cross a few more casinos off the Never-Gambled-At list. Mandalay Bay, Luxor, and MGM, gird yourselves. I’m a-comin’.
    28. Spend the last few hours with the crew. The gaming at this point is utterly unpredictable and random – whatever strikes our fancy. Our go-to on the last day used to be a Pai Gow marathon, but ever since we got pillaged at the Mirage (I lost $100 at a $10 table in 35 minutes – not easy to do) we have been gunshy about trying that again.
    29. Bid farewell to the rest of the crew and stay sad for about three seconds after they leave because I’ll see them at work the next day and BECAUSE I’M STILL IN VEGAS AND MY FLIGHT DOESN’T LEAVE FOR ANOTHER FIVE HOURS. Get gambling again.
    30. Tick off Palazzo/Wynn/Encore (as in tick them off the list of places I need to gamble at, not tick off the pit boss or the security guards). $1 Bonus Poker adventure will happen here – that is, in the event (likely) that it hasn’t already happened and in the event (less likely) that I have something resembling a bankroll left.
    31. Lunch at Secret Pizza. I suppose step 30a should be “Find Secret Pizza.”
    32. Drinks at Book & Stage.
    33. Complete the Cycle of Quads. To the best of my recollection, I have not yet gotten four 3s, 5s, 8s, 9s, 10s, Kings, or Aces. Well, Aces once…on Deuces Wild, which I do not count. 20 credits does not a Quad make.
    34. Depart for the airport a happy man. Or a drunk man, or an exhausted man, or any sort of man. Because that’s what I arrived as.
    35. If Cycle of Quads not yet accomplished, attempt only last-ditch measure available…Airport Video Poker. I mean, how tight can those machines actually be?
    36. Return safely. The only thing that really, truly matters.
     
  4. weluvvegas

    weluvvegas Casino Countess

    Joined:
    Dec 31, 2003
    Messages:
    3,024
    Location:
    Northern CA
    Trips to Las Vegas:
    24
    I try and pre plan everything out every time we go to Vegas. When you get there, I promise you - the plan will fly out the window. I'll cross my fingers for you that you complete the cycle of quads...if you are able to stick to any of this, that one ould obviously be the best!

    We'll be there the same weekend. May the Gods of luck smile upon us both!
     
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