1. Welcome to VegasMessageBoard
    It appears you are visiting our community as a guest.
    In order to view full-size images, participate in discussions, vote in polls, etc, you will need to Log in or Register.

Hooker Stories

Discussion in 'Vegas After Dark' started by mesa, Jan 5, 2009.

  1. Dean Martin

    Dean Martin VIP Whale

    Joined:
    Jan 16, 2003
    Messages:
    5,785
    Location:
    VA
    Trips to Las Vegas:
    40
    OK..I haven't even seen this lady, let alone get approched by her and this is starting to creep me out..:evillaugh
     
  2. farkingidiot

    farkingidiot High-Roller

    Joined:
    May 19, 2003
    Messages:
    722
    Location:
    Crossroads of America
    Trips to Las Vegas:
    40
    Okay, not a super-great story, but here goes:

    I was out about 4 a.m. with a buddy, hitting the bars. We'd just left Rio. We were waiting for a taxi when this girl, shoes in hand, came up behind us. As a taxi pulled up, we got in and she asked me if we could share a cab. When I told her that she didn't know where we were going, she said as long as it was another casino hotel she was fine.

    Then we had this great silent conversation. I looked her in the eyes and raised my eyebrow a bit. She looked at me with feigned innocense, then got a little smirk. I cocked my head a little and smiled back at her. Just a little one, as I arched my eyebrows a little more. She stared back at me a minute, then veeerryyy slightly nodded her head, as if to say "yeah, I'm a hooker."

    I reached over, took her hand and told her that we would be honored to share a taxi with her.

    So we get in, all three in the backseat and she held my hand on the ride to MGM with her head on my shoulder. We talked just a little as my buddy just stared out his side window and I noticed her Jamacain accent. I told her that I thought it was fake, and she acted offended and swore she was from Barbados and rattled off a bunch of places there.

    At the end of the ride, I help her out of the taxi and she started to reach for her purse. I stopped her and told her it was my treat. She thanked me, gave me a big hug and a kiss on the cheek and whispered in my ear, in a thick New York accent, "Okay, I'm really from New York, but everyone's got to have a gimmick, right?"

    We pulled back from each other, still holding hands and looked at each other for a beat, then busted out laughing. I wished her good luck and my buddy and I went to check out Studio 54, as she gave me a smile and a wave and walked away.

    So there ya go, a "romantic" hooker story.
     
    • Like Like x 5
    • Funny Funny x 1
  3. keno

    keno obsessed with countdown timers

    Joined:
    Mar 27, 2005
    Messages:
    3,050
    Location:
    Bay Area, CA
    Trips to Las Vegas:
    241
    Creep you out that you haven't been approached by her yet? ;)
     
  4. DaveP

    DaveP VIP Whale

    Joined:
    Aug 24, 2004
    Messages:
    2,907
    Location:
    At work
    Trips to Las Vegas:
    20
    In a "what's wrong with me" kind of way. :poke:
     
  5. HoyaHeel

    HoyaHeel Grammar Police & Admin

    Joined:
    Feb 24, 2002
    Messages:
    26,509
    Location:
    North Carolina
    Trips to Las Vegas:
    16
    I've seen Gypsy, I know that line:thumbsup: You gotta have a gimmick, girl, if you wanna get ahead:peace:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gFRSawe33sA [Natalie Wood, love her!!]
     
  6. Dean Martin

    Dean Martin VIP Whale

    Joined:
    Jan 16, 2003
    Messages:
    5,785
    Location:
    VA
    Trips to Las Vegas:
    40
    LOL...you Vegas Pervs...I knew that was coming:rolleyes2:

    Yea that's just what I need is a 300lb black hummer....

    But a 5000lb Black Hummer, now you're talkin:thumbsup:
     
  7. farkingidiot

    farkingidiot High-Roller

    Joined:
    May 19, 2003
    Messages:
    722
    Location:
    Crossroads of America
    Trips to Las Vegas:
    40
  8. Jack21

    Jack21 Guest

    A couple of years back I went to the Spearamint Rhino accompanied by a fellow anonymous VMBer. It was quite busy for a Sunday night but I guess the big shoppers' convention had them hoppin'. My pal sipped her drink in the dimness while I trolled, finally coming across this blonde barbie named Inga who was not shy with regards to 900-number style conversation. I gave her the opportunity to enterain me, and for $60 she was worth it. My board-buddy had a midnight curfew so we said our goodbyes, and not long after that I was grabbed by a long lean attractive looking lady in a chiffon '20s-style flapper outfit and velvet gloves to her elbows. Very assertive, these ladies. She introduced herself as Bettie and without pause plopped down on the sofa next to me- one leg across my lap, arm around my shoulders- and launched into a hard sell about some company she worked for that marketed a product called "Sphincterine." Apparently it's like mouthwash for your ass, and she was really pitching hard for me to try it. Although I politely declined she pressed on, pushing her business card into my hand. Face to face I quickly realized she was much older than I thought on first impression. She also had some nutty, desperate look about her...very creepy. I think she may have been planning some sort of dinner party because she said I could come to her place and toss her salad. After some more nervous conversation I politely stood up and backed away, continuing like a crawfish straight to the exit. I noticed the website on the card, mintyass.com, before chucking it into the trash. I spent the taxi ride home dousing myself with what remained of the hand sanitizer.

    Figured I should throw this one in the...annals.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 8, 2009
    • Like Like x 1
    • Wow! Wow! x 1
  9. angel81chick

    angel81chick Abuelita

    Joined:
    Jun 29, 2007
    Messages:
    2,687
    Location:
    City of Angels
    Trips to Las Vegas:
    999

    You aren't serious with really thinking that are you?

    Tossing Salad - Google it!

    A** (enter tongue movement here)
     
  10. HurricaneMikey

    HurricaneMikey A-List Buffoon

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2002
    Messages:
    5,865
    Location:
    Southeast of Sin City
    Trips to Las Vegas:
    25
    Oh geez, Sandra... :rolleyes2:

    I'm sure Jack 21 knows all about what tossing salad means. I mean, he hangs out with Terry for cryin' out loud! :evillaugh:evillaugh :eek:

    Mikey
     
  11. LV Terry

    LV Terry Captain Flop'N Fold

    Joined:
    Sep 30, 2001
    Messages:
    3,957
    Location:
    Santa Barbara, CA, USA
    Can I just say, as a veteran of some fairly substantial buffoonery:

    Never. Ever. throw funny shit like that in the trash without at least taking a picture of it!!! Busted out at the right moment, that business card could have had tequila shooting through countless noses at once!!
     
  12. Jack21

    Jack21 Guest

    Since my slap 'n tickle fight last with Terry year I've been goin' all veggie.
     
  13. Coaster Kikky

    Coaster Kikky Tourist

    Joined:
    Jan 8, 2003
    Messages:
    11,493
    Location:
    Here
    Trips to Las Vegas:
    32
    Quite the story, E. Very tongue in cheek.
     
    • Funny Funny x 1
  14. angel81chick

    angel81chick Abuelita

    Joined:
    Jun 29, 2007
    Messages:
    2,687
    Location:
    City of Angels
    Trips to Las Vegas:
    999
    Ok, ok....no more giving VMB members the benefit of the doubt...geez! :wink2:
     
  15. DonD

    DonD VIP Whale

    Joined:
    Nov 5, 2004
    Messages:
    9,135
    Location:
    So Cal 91748
    Trips to Las Vegas:
    300
  16. Royal Flusher

    Royal Flusher Savvy Gambler

    Joined:
    Feb 18, 2008
    Messages:
    6,550
    Location:
    Flusherville, Canada
    Trips to Las Vegas:
    60

    http://www.mintyass.com/index.html

    [​IMG]
     
  17. HurricaneMikey

    HurricaneMikey A-List Buffoon

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2002
    Messages:
    5,865
    Location:
    Southeast of Sin City
    Trips to Las Vegas:
    25
    Somehow I've got a feeling (fresh and tingly, even!) that a bottle of this stuff is gonna find it's way to the March Madness festivities... :rolleyes2:

    Mikey
     
  18. DonD

    DonD VIP Whale

    Joined:
    Nov 5, 2004
    Messages:
    9,135
    Location:
    So Cal 91748
    Trips to Las Vegas:
    300
  19. Joe Strummer

    Joe Strummer VIP Whale

    Joined:
    Apr 4, 2006
    Messages:
    5,109
    Hookers in Vegas ?
    .
    .
    #1....
    Lately, I'm running into more of the "Gambling Whore" type.
    Short Vegas stay.....gamble + lose.....turn a trick.....get back
    out there + gamble some more !
    .
    .
    #2....
    Weekender.....from Cal.......might even have her boyfriend w/
    her.
    "Sweetheart, we lost all our $$$....now, darlin' go make us some money !"
    .
    .
    I've run into both these types, lately.
    .
    .
    Had a guy offer his girlfiend to me at a Crap table at Tropicana.
    "Dude, I don't know you, but.......she's your girlfriend !!! ??"
    "Yeh...so what ?"
    .
    .
    .
    Had a "chick" pull up in a brand new White truck -
    block my path on the sidewalk - north of Sahara - 3 am.
    "Hey, honey, wanna get in my truck ?"
    "No thanks....I'll walk."
    Her truck was the only thing NEW + CLEAN !
    .
    .
    Had my wife get "approached" by a guy at Caesars sports bar.
    My wife was so naive, at first.........it was funny !
    When she caught on..:eek:
    She turned to me and asked a VP strategy question --
    I called her "Ma'am" and pretended NOT to know her !
    The bartenders were hysterical !
    They were pouring me Patron after that.......and my wife was
    punching my ribs.:kiss:
    .
    .
    There was the "Tranny" at The Sahara casino bar.
    Wanted to go to my room.
    Had the hormone injections....fake boobs.....
    .but I think "The Package" was still there.
    .
    .
    In the Golden Nugget -
    I met a very aggressive ....."Massage Therapist".
    I said "I don't need a massage right now."
    She whispered in my ear "Then, how 'bout a BJ."
    I'm guessing she didn't have a license.
    .
    .
    .
    Caesars Nephretitty Bar........4 am.
    - mistakenly walked passed this bar.
    I avoided it EVERY other nite of my stay !
    I had to run "THE GAUNTLET OF HOOKERS"
    Held onto my $$ wad and put my head down and
    rushed for a First Down !
    I don't know if I had any clothes left on me ?
    .
    .
    I've got more.
     
  20. Jack21

    Jack21 Guest

    Nevada issues licenses for that? Are there different classes depending on the level of service/degree of complexity?