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Bad joke of the day - 2022

Discussion in 'Non-Vegas Chat' started by wormhole, Jul 14, 2016.

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  1. wormhole

    wormhole VIP Whale

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    All the organs of the body were having a meeting trying to decide who was the one in charge.

    "I should be in charge," said the brain, "Because I run all the body's systems, so without me nothing would happen."

    "I should be in charge," said the blood, "Because I circulate oxygen all over so without me you'd all waste away."

    "I should be in charge," said the stomach," Because I process food and give all of you energy."

    "I should be in charge," said the legs, "because I carry the body wherever it needs to go."

    "I should be in charge," said the eyes, "Because I allow the body to see where it goes."

    "I should be in charge," said the rectum, "Because I'm responsible for waste removal."

    All the other body parts laughed at the rectum and insulted him,
    So in a huff, he shut down tight.
    Within a few days, the brain had a terrible headache .
    The stomach was bloated,
    The legs got wobbly,
    The eyes got watery,
    And the blood was toxic.
    They all decided that the rectum should be the boss

    The Moral of the story?
    Even though the others do all the work..
    The ass hole is usually in charge.
     
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  2. Sonya

    Sonya Queen of VMB

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    Last edited: Jan 4, 2022
  3. gadgets19

    gadgets19 VIP Whale

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    upload_2022-1-2_12-24-59.png
     
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  4. gs32794

    gs32794 VIP Whale

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    Screenshot_20220104-181033_Chrome.jpg
     
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  5. Valgal

    Valgal VIP Whale

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    69A7C2D6-04AE-4C25-B197-6ABCE54E3379.jpeg 042B8BF9-ABB5-49CB-BEB7-3AB75F5D13CE.jpeg 2CDCA6E6-5459-4580-9CA7-592A933704C5.jpeg
     
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  6. Valgal

    Valgal VIP Whale

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    Not a joke but someone texted me this a few weeks ago. Apparently we messaged each other on tinder??? I so wanted to text back and make a date. I think he was in NYC according to where it came from.

    185BFE6A-E2D3-4CEC-9874-B4630282A518.jpeg
     
    Last edited: Jan 5, 2022
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  7. Valgal

    Valgal VIP Whale

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    282A8DE5-12F7-47E6-8DE2-21ADAFABABCD.jpeg
     
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  8. bubbakitty

    bubbakitty Doing retirement again and happily so....

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    Hummm or whistle along…… 1722BC78-A1D8-4A98-B859-B17FF8DDF85C.jpeg
     
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  9. gs32794

    gs32794 VIP Whale

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    Had a job as a drill press operator. It was boring.
     
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  10. GamblingGolfer

    GamblingGolfer VIP Whale

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    Should that be Andy or Jim whistling? .... lol

    GG
     
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  11. gadgets19

    gadgets19 VIP Whale

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    upload_2022-1-6_23-20-3.jpeg
     
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  12. Valgal

    Valgal VIP Whale

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  13. The Stig

    The Stig VIP Whale

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    [​IMG]
     
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  14. gs32794

    gs32794 VIP Whale

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    First fahrvergnugen, now this. :D FB_IMG_1641761751458.jpg
     
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  15. bubbakitty

    bubbakitty Doing retirement again and happily so....

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    I can attest; FE34E318-7C6B-4E17-A518-268245A39E16.jpeg
     
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  16. booker

    booker VIP Whale

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    @bubbakitty, for Christmas I requested and received a couple of magnifying glasses.
     
  17. bubbakitty

    bubbakitty Doing retirement again and happily so....

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    We have about four already. Two with handles like Sherlock Holmes :hmmm:
     
    Last edited: Jan 9, 2022
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  18. dmr

    dmr Registered Abuser

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    Q: Why couldn't the green pepper play in the archery tournament?

    ...
    ...
    ...

    A: He didn't habanero.

    (Where is that *GROAN* icon?)
     
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  19. booker

    booker VIP Whale

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    Screen Shot 2022-01-12 at 7.46.26 PM.png
     
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  20. gadgets19

    gadgets19 VIP Whale

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    upload_2022-1-12_22-14-18.jpeg
     
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