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Semi single

Discussion in 'Non-Vegas Chat' started by LolaDoggie, Aug 21, 2020.

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  1. LB9

    LB9 PH Blackjack Degen

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    Oh okay, yeah I'm not that desperate.
     
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  2. LolaDoggie

    LolaDoggie VIP Whale

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    Quick update;

    -haven't seen him in like 4 or 5 weeks
    -haven't spoken to him in about 3 weeks
    -our last conversation was shitty, I lost patience and let some things out that I had been keeping in, not nicely. No raised voices or insults, just shitty and I don't like how I shared the things I shared, I've had good control over my mouth for a good few years now and the fact that I lost control showed me I had to pull back, way back so I don't make things worse
    -contact has been limited to text or email about the cats or finances
    -I visited with his older (adopted) brother and his wife 2 days ago, nice visit, they are supportive of us in whatever way, they can't believe I'm waiting him out...my nephew didn't know I was coming and just lit up when he saw me, that did my heart good
    -still selling and otherwise decluttering
    -hired a service to help though; it's 2 ladies who specialize in moves, like setting up the home, organizing, decluttering, cleaning etc. So, booked them for 4 hours on the 20th. I've been working so much that's the first slot I've got. Big relief because there were things I was struggling with physically, limitations of time and energy, and I just want it done.
    -working a lot, church (ushering or screening) and the odd social thing
    -not sure what I'm going to do with my November vacation time
    -really appreciate all the support from friends and family
    -I'm not riding the emotional roller coaster so much, as often, as "violently" for lack of a better word(?)
     
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  3. bubbakitty

    bubbakitty Doing retirement again and happily so....

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    Seriously, if the possibility exists as to reconciliation, don’t sell his personal-coin-card-casino chip— collections. It would not be a good video. Sell inaminate Possessions void of attachment.
     
  4. LolaDoggie

    LolaDoggie VIP Whale

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    No no honey. I'm not doing anything of the sort. I'm just making changes in furniture and art and whatnot that are to my tastes. I also sold the massive crockpot, stuff like that. Since I'm not a housewife anymore. I have his father's police badges, his sister's ashes, etc etc. Those are family heirlooms for me too. So, no, would never even think of doing such a thing.
     
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  5. breanna61

    breanna61 Super Moderator

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  6. LolaDoggie

    LolaDoggie VIP Whale

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    ?
     
  7. breanna61

    breanna61 Super Moderator

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    Sounds stressful
     
  8. LolaDoggie

    LolaDoggie VIP Whale

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    It's busy right now. I'm doing my best to stay busy.
     
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  9. TableToddyy

    TableToddyy VIP Whale

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    Moral of the story
    Some mistakes get made
     
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  10. LolaDoggie

    LolaDoggie VIP Whale

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    Christmas tree just sold and went. Big tub I was keeping it in thrown in to boot. 3 foot tree waiting for me to pick it up. Decorations are going to be decluttered. The lady I hired for organizing and cleaning came today, fell in love with Jethro (how could she not?).
     
  11. LolaDoggie

    LolaDoggie VIP Whale

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    No fool like an old fool. My husband broke an agreement. I'm tired of his "surprises". I asked for a legal separation today and reached out to a lawyer. Very sad.
     
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  12. Flowers

    Flowers VIP Whale

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    I can't even begin to imagine how you must be feeling but I wish you strength and calm during these challenging times.
     
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  13. LolaDoggie

    LolaDoggie VIP Whale

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    Thank you. It started out a really nice day. But, I checked with him on something having to do with benefits. Got a surprise (one of a long string of them) and decided to send him a text back saying I was ready for a legal separation. I said "you win". No response. Tomorrow I'll ask for the keys to the apartment to be mailed back to me. He's been driving this dumpster fire for too long.
     
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  14. Michael Smith

    Michael Smith VIP Whale

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    Two ex-wives here. Only spoken to one of them in the last several years because we share a daughter. Otherwise, move on. Life is short and I find I am much, much happier as a solo or once in a while sharing a dinner or bottle of wine with a female friend.

    On another note, I absolutely loved the Imperial Palace Buffet—probably ate there 100 times. I loved that you could get as many sodas or ice teas as you wanted at the fountain. And, I remember the midnight prime rib buffet at the Nugget—excellent for the drunk or the loser.
     
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  15. salukidean

    salukidean High-Roller

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    Its always tough to move on but it seems inevitable at this point in time. Even if he agreed to reconcile, it sounds like the difference are so great and the magic is so far gone that it wouldn't last for long. Accepting that its over and moving on will allow you to get on with your life instead of being in a holding pattern.
     
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  16. AyDee

    AyDee is getting too old for this

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    Wishing you the best future unburdened life. It truly is too short for that shit.
     
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  17. Valgal

    Valgal VIP Whale

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    Some people like to have their cake and eat it too. Sometimes you just have to walk away- sadly. Don’t know how things are in Canada but in US regarding health benefits or employer retirements etc. you can’t just drop a spouse even during divorce proceedings.

    Make sure you have a good attorney - a bull dog that is looking out for you. I had a friend who had a kitten as an attorney and her ex had the bull dog. It was awful.
     
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  18. AyDee

    AyDee is getting too old for this

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  19. LolaDoggie

    LolaDoggie VIP Whale

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    I think that ship has sailed when it comes to reconciliation.
     
  20. LolaDoggie

    LolaDoggie VIP Whale

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    I only had the pleasure of the Imperial Palace buffet once. We had lunch on the 2/1 coupons. It was as old school as you could get. Reminded me of the cafeterias at department stores when I was a kid. Which made me happy cuz I'm a weirdo. The best part was a French Canadian fighting with a waiter over the terms of the same coupon I was using. He was really being a dick. Naturally I got involved because I don't like it when fellow French Canadians give the rest of us a bad name. He started laughing and stopped hassling the waiter. The waiter thanked me afterwards. The man I was married to at the time was just shaking his head.

    OK, I don't know how to refer to him now. This is awkward.
     
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