Wedding gift help?

Sadly this seems to be the case. What has happened to common courtesy?

 

The last wedding I went to was a couple of years ago. Young couple in their 30s. Both successful in IT. They had been living together for a few years. Her father is one of my husband’s best friends. We had to RSVP on line. Their site said they preferred $$$. They were not registered anywhere. They had a box on a table for cards/money. There were a few gifts on the table. I figured they were going on a honeymoon. We found out they used the money to refloor their house. I can’t remember but I think we gave $100. We did get a thank you note. I have no problem with giving money or a gift card.

 

If you know where they're going on their honeymoon, I suggest researching restaurants in the area and getting them a gift cert. I did that for my friends' anniversary when they were going to NOLA and they loved it.

 

I do remember a wedding a few years ago. Never got a thank you.

For all I know, somebody else walked off with the gift and the new couple thinks we stiffed them.

P.S. - She had an affair and they are both remarried now.. LOL!

 

For a couple that probably has everything to start ....this might actually be the way give. But I get what you’re saying....

 

Give them cash,everyone I know likes money.

 

Meh, get them a toaster. It's traditional.

 

It doesn’t seem like you even see the bride & groom, just her parents once or twice a year. Doesn’t make much sense that you’d be invited even if you could physically attend. Get a nice card and put in a check for $100. The worry will be over.

 

Do they have a puppy?

 

When she was younger, we saw her more often, but things change as we all age. We have never met the groom.

 

Both working at their careers, so no, there are no pets.

 

I would say to give money in the form of a check. In case they "forgot" to thank you for the monetary gift at least you will know they got it once the check clears.

I usually write it Pay to the order of Mr. OR Mrs. so and so.

 

Just give a card with a check or put into the honeymoon fund. Really is the thought that counts, especially given their age and circumstances.
I think it's an American cultural stigma about giving cash/cash equivalent gifts, though probably less with younger generations.
I attended a Vietnamese wedding/reception a few years ago and all gifts were cash/check.

 

Drop a c-note (if feasible). End of story. It sounds like you're a tangential attachment to the couple so it's kind of like you're giving a gift to acknowledge the friendship with mom, not so much the daughter. And let us ask the big question: when, if ever, do you think you're going to see the couple again? Do y'all chat? The wedding gift of 2020 is not the same as in 1950. You're not helping the couple launch their lives together (as they're both in their 40's and pretty well established). Think of it as a courtesy. This might sound mean, but, how relevant is that gift going to be five years hence?

DO PEOPLE GIVE CASH TO WELL OFF PEOPLE: I'm trying to come up with a list of people I know who won't accept cash. Gonna have to give you a call back.

 

A card with a thoughtful note and a check in the amount you and your wife agree is appropriate mailed in advance.
Weddings are special.