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Is there really any good time for a solo trip?

Discussion in 'Misc. Vegas Chat' started by Odelay77, Jul 11, 2016.

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  1. Odelay77

    Odelay77 Low-Roller

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    Just tossing this out there, in case anyone has ever been in a similar situation and wants to chime in…

    I’m 38, married, with a six month old daughter who I love dearly. I’m a homeowner in decent financial shape, gainfully employed, etc.


    My wife and I are used to going to Vegas every year or so. We love going together, but I’m the one who chooses everything and plans everything and she’s more or less along for the ride… That’s how we do all of our vacations, since I have fun planning ahead and she just wants to relax while on vacation and not have to think much.


    Now, with a new baby, I’m starting to wonder if my wife and I will ever see Vegas again. We sure as hell don’t want to go with a baby, since that seems to defeat the entire purpose.


    So, for her birthday this year, I’m buying her a solo trip to see her best friend in Denver. She’ll be there 5 days while I stay home with the baby. I’m sneaking this in with a proposal to buy myself a solo trip to Vegas. I’ve always wanted to try going by myself… since I usually go with a group and end up being the defacto tour guide/planner for everyone, I always feel a little slowed down by everyone while I’m there. Going solo will allow me to see a bunch of out of the way spots that I’ve always wanted to take in, but figured no one else would be up for.


    So, the point of the post… Is this an insane proposal? Am I human garbage for wanting to take a solo trip with a wife and baby at home? I really do want us both to be able to still travel while she’s so young, but the prospect of taking a long trip with a baby just sounds too exhausting. This way, I figure we’ll both still get some well-deserved rest and won’t have to worry about all of the exhaustion that comes with traveling with a baby.
     
  2. Snidely

    Snidely VIP Whale

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    I don't know, man. You're parents, now. I don't know you or your wife so hard to give advice from my keyboard but I'd plan for family vacations for the next 10-15 years.
     
  3. Sonya

    Sonya Queen of VMB

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    I think your wife has to be the one to answer your question. ;)

    I dont think it's unreasonable to do a solo trip. But as a wife, I have to tell you that we don't always react well to "generous acts" with strings attached. Is her Denver trip contingent on your Vegas trip? That might be a tough sell.
     
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  4. andyg99

    andyg99 VIP Whale

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    and back in my days as a husband I remember a few of those offers myself... but this is one question where we will all give different advice based our life experiences... I agree with the comment about putting Vegas on hold for about 15 years with newborns and toddlers... but only one persons opinion really matters, that is the OPs wife... OP - even if she is agreeable to your solo trip beware!
     
    Vegas Trip #57
    Vegas Trip #58, Sammy Hagar
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  5. Ty

    Ty ?

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    If your wife agrees, I could see a solo trip or two while baby is young. When baby is 4+ the family trips kick in. We didn't get back to Vegas on a regular schedule till our son entered college. That was 2014. I took my first solo trip this year, at age 50, all prior trips were with my wife.
     
  6. Irishkicker23

    Irishkicker23 Low-Roller

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    I say if your wife is ok with it, then by all means go and have fun. Some of my best trips to Vegas are Solo trips.
    When you are alone, you can do what you want when you want and no one is there to judge you or slow you down. You can stay up all night and sleep in or go to bed early and get up early. You can choose where you want to eat etc... You can explore in any direction and then find your way back.
    My only advice is to make your solo trip a little shorter than a normal trip. Otherwise, talk it over and have a blast.
     
  7. Golfer

    Golfer Well-Known Member

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    Can't answer the question specifically as I'm not married, and have no children.

    I can answer it generally however. Solo I've been able to go fishing on Lake Mead, drive to the Rose Bowl to see a college football game, eat exactly where I want to eat, gamble as little or as much as I feel like, etc, etc, ad infinitum...

    I can also answer generally that I have personally gravitated towards downtown, and away from the strip. The only reason is money, and I make more now that I have ever made. And it's probably not going to change in the other direction either due to some long term investments. Here is my point. My life circumstances have changed. Not like having a wife, or a family, but financially. They have changed where I'm reviewing how much money I spend, and what I'll need to retire. So I decided blowing strip money isn't a good idea, and more trips, shorter trips and spending less money gambling make more sense given where I'm at right now.

    So circumstances change, people's lives change, people's tastes change. That's my experience about how I had to change certain lifestyle choices due to changes I decided to make in my life. It sounds like you'll need to make at least some changes as your life has changed also. But you and your wife will answer these questions yourself.
     
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  8. Italladdsup

    Italladdsup Low-Roller

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    When our kids were little we traded off with my sister. I would keep her kids while she and her husband went to Vegas and then she would keep mine so that we could go. The kids loved spending time with their cousins and we all got to enjoy our vacation. You still have to take a family vacation also or your kids will not be happy.
     
  9. Camp Rusty

    Camp Rusty VIP Whale

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    Oh Boy......not knowing much about anything I would have to agree with Sonya......if it is a stringy deal, maybe not so good. Possibly an up front trade dealy thing though ? Each person gets a week off from baby duties ?

    I have two exes.....I know more about quantum physics, rocket science, and brain surgery combined than women. D'OH !

    ...and congratulations on the new baby :):):)
     
  10. wanker751

    wanker751 Dutch Rudder Enthusiast

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    So... either I am a shitty husband or have a great wife or whatever...

    GO! If your wife is fine with it.

    I have a kid 5. I went with friends when he was 4 and solo this past Jan.

    We now have a 3 month old (today!) and I am sending my wife and her mom for our anniversary in October and I will probably go with friends this Jan.


    We also are not rich, I am a teacher and she as a COTA.

    Also solo trips are great....
     
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  11. Dr Nostron

    Dr Nostron VIP Whale

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    Even the best and most involved parents and spouses need some alone time to recharge the batteries - go and have fun assuming not an huge deal to your wife
     
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  12. BackInVegas

    BackInVegas VIP Whale

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    Yes, lots of good times to go solo. But since you have the baby, I suggest making it a SHORT trip, three or four days max. I encouraged my wife to take trips while I took care of the kids, she appreciated it. I personally feel that having kids should be all about having fun with the kids and getting attention to the kids.

    If you really enjoy football, it is great to go in August for pre-betting, any weekend during football season, and College Bowl Games in December is a blast. If you know College Basketball, March Madness has got to be a blast. This year, the Sports Books were going crazy with the Golden State Warriors.

    Also, some bad times to go. Avoid President's Day Weekend, Memorial Day Weekend, 4th July Weekend, Valentine's Day, New Year's, Super Bowl, and Labor Day Weekend. The rest of the time it is fine.

    For me, NEVER bring a child to Las Vegas. EVER. The stuff you want to do, is not ANYTHING the kids will want to do.

    Take children to fun parks(Disneyland, Disney World, Universal Parks, Hershey Park, King's Island, etc), the ocean, Washington DC, anything educational, National Parks, anywhere with a pool, etc.. Right now, your little one is awesome, but not really conducive for traveling.

    Not to mention, the baby on the plane. Every March we took our babies/kids to Phoenix to visit Grandma and Grandpa. Luckily, our kids just flat out slept on the plane. My wife would feed them before getting on so they zonked out.

    BTW, Vegas is getting a LOT LESS baby stroller friendly on holidays. New Year's this year the laws are VERY STRICT. No strollers, no backpacks, no nothing. Thank you weirdos, for screwing up our world.

    In conclusion, give her a child free trip, you take a child free trip, but make them short. Your wife will definitely have MOM GUILT more than you will have DAD guilt.

    Since you are in Champaign, Illinois, as your kids get older, Cahokia Mounds, the swamp on the southern tip of Illinois, the Superman Town of Metropolis, and obviously Chicago and St. Louis. Indianapolis has a great Children's Museum. Abe Lincoln's place in Springfield, IL. Hannibal Missouri.
     
    Last edited: Jul 12, 2016
  13. Lovegas95

    Lovegas95 Too much work...need more play.

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    I'm married but we're empty-nesters. Mrs. LV enjoys going to Vegas with me. She and I will be there in hours now for our 5th trip together. I do all the planning as well. She cringes when I go solo (and I'm going with one of the guys in September) stating that's not "husbandly". This will be my 3rd solo trip. For some reason she becomes obsessed with hookers and blow. I've given her no reason to believe that I would partake in such activities. :angel: She feels this way whether I'm in Nevada, NC, DC or wherever. I have always encouraged her to go places with her friends but she rarely ever does. I completely understand that the degree of freedom I'd like to have I have to allow that for her. We travel to plenty other places together. But if she does not want to go, or cannot go and I can go, I do go. I feel I've earned that freedom after putting her, 3 kids and myself through college, bought a home and will soon be retired.
     
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  14. Hobofrank

    Hobofrank Prime Minister of Idiocracy

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    everybody needs a break from diaper duty and not sleeping
    at least in Vegas you have the option of sleepingo_O
    as the stay at home dad of 3 kids under age 10?...I was changing 3 kids at same time all day
    then potty training.

    if daddy doesn't get to Vegas every so often (2 months right now on average)
    and remember my given name is Frank and not Daddy?
    I might go nuts.:D

    just be up front about the offer and see what she says
     
  15. gebruiker

    gebruiker High-Roller

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    My wife and I have a 3 year old and a 7 year old, we take turns on solo trips and every now and then my mother jumps in so we can overlap a couple of days.
    Mind you: we're from the Netherlands, flights are long so trips are usually 7 days+.
     
  16. Sonya

    Sonya Queen of VMB

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    I've thought about this a bit since my first post. I think 6 months - 1 year might be the ideal time for a solo trip. The first 6 months seem to be (No kids here, so just going on what I've seen with my friends & family) a crazy time of sleepless nights and worry about the new baby. But by 6 months, you've got a system down, they sleep through the night, and leaving a parent alone for a few days isn't as horrible. Plus, the baby isn't asking for Disney trips yet and won't even remember you were gone. :)

    If your wife is agreeable, I think now is as good a time as any for a solo trip before you're doing the road trips to Grandma's and Disney adventures for the next 15 years.
     
  17. GENESIS

    GENESIS EAT-LOVE-PRAY-INHALE

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    Personally I don't see anything wrong with it. Maybe because our kids are grown, but really even before they grew into the know it all adults they are now, I welcomed solo trips. Originally hubbs and I were going to Atlanta in August (our anniversary month) to visit my in-laws for a couple of days then drive to Biloxi to stay at Rivage. After thinking about the last visit with the inlaws:bang::bang::bang: I said screw it!! I'm going to Vegas! So, I put my plan in motion:whistle: Knowing that hubby wanted to go to Seattle to visit his uncle, one night I whispered in his ear and said, "Hey honey, why not go to Seattle and visit G in August instead of us going to Atlanta". He looked at me like....whaaaa....and I'm like yesss babe I want you to go and have fun fun fun:headbang::headbang:and he's like, What about our Anniversary? and I'm like Baby, don't worry about it:kiss:we can do something iater;) So after I made his ressie, he looked at me and said, Baby, I feel bad about us missing our anniversary trip:( and I'm like baby, cheer up its all Kool and the Gang since I'm going to Vegas in September:woohoo::woohoo::woohoo: and he's like WHAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!! and I'm like YEAHHHHHH:headbang::headbang::headbang::headbang:Vegas Baby!!!! and he's like damnnnn well played baby....:thumbsup:and I'm like yeahhh....:love:THAT'S WHY WOMEN RULE:lock::woohoo::woohoo:
     
    Last edited: Jul 12, 2016
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  18. KimiCoconuts

    KimiCoconuts Low-Roller

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    I honestly think you should go together and find someone to watch the baby. It's good to get away. If that isn't an option, bring the baby and bring along a helper so you can go out. If that isn't an option, ask your wife if she would mind if you go alone, but do not leverage her trip with yours, thats a little evil. Otherwise, I see nothing wrong with you asking and wanting, and going, you are not a jerk ;)
     
  19. hammie

    hammie VIP Whale

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    It seems when a wife does this it's perfectly fine, but when the husband does the same thing he is a selfish dirtbag who is obviously going to get drunk and laid while abandoning his 6 month old. Is it a double standard?

    I think a solo trip is great, but there is no reason to sneak in the Vegas trip as a condition to the wife's Denver trip, I would tell her upfront. Women are emotional, men are logical. This is based on being married over 25 years with two daughters and a female dog.

    I'm jealous.
     
    Last edited: Jul 13, 2016
  20. GENESIS

    GENESIS EAT-LOVE-PRAY-INHALE

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    Hammie, my hubbs said the same thing about women being emotional and men are logical. Although that may be true in some instances, and after being together for 27 years and married for 23,I quickly grew out of that. I'll never forget after only being married for a couple of years, i went major batcrap crazy when i found out hubbs went to a strip club. I was so pissed that i left him for a day:rolleyes: Yep, that was emotional overkill. Me being a young emotional bride of 2 years drove 2 hours home to mom and dad crying like a baby. Got a real shock when they told me to get a grip, grow up and go back home:nono::nono: Although that wasn't the sympathy i was looking for, I'm happy they did it. See, i had a lot of growing to do with dealing with emotions and thinking my marriage was going to be perfect and easy....yeah, I was totally wrong:whistle: As the saying goes, "MARRIAGE AIN'T NO JOKE" ! After dealing with the highs and lows that affects marriages we've never been better. There's No going to bed mad after disagreements, i know how to say i'm sorry when I'm wrong. It's boiled down to both spiritual and mental growth and fighting for what we have. Sorry if it seems i'm giving a sermon on marriage as I sometimes get wordy:oops: I guess what I'm saying is that from my personal experience and growth, the small things don't bother me anymore. Heck, I tell my hubbs to go to the strip club when his friends visit. His buddies are like :woohoo:man you're so lucky:woohoo: He say's he's beyond that at his age of 53:rolleyes:.. whatever:rolleyes: He knows if he did, it wouldn't bother me. Life is too short to sweat the small petty stuff. We trust one another and keep it moving. That said, vacationing alone or with other people besides your spouse is OK to do.....at least I THINK SO.... As an adult, sit down talk to the wife and tell her this is what you would like to do. Resolutions are easy when there's honesty. You know that saying, absence makes the heart grow fonder.

    Also, there shouldn't be double standards nor should men be considered dirtbags because they want to do solo trips. Just be honest and straightforward :nworthy:
     
    Last edited: Jul 13, 2016
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