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TR: VP at My House, 08/06/2015

Discussion in 'Non-Vegas Trip Reports' started by lithium78, Aug 6, 2015.

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  1. lithium78

    lithium78 High-Roller

    Joined:
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    New Jersey
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    My Trip Report

    Okay, so I was supposed to go to Caesars AC today with a friend, because I have the day off and it's Mystery Multiplier Day for reward credits, but my friend flaked on me. "Crap," I thought, "There goes my beach day plus I don't have an opportunity to get my game on." Au contraire, mon frere. Here in New Jersey, we're allowed to gamble online over the computer for real money. "Okay," I'm thinking to myself, "If I can't go to AC, I will bring AC to me."

    Here is my trip report from the casino at my house:

    I get up early and eat a sumptuous breakfast at Chez Lithium of Frozen Eggo waffles, Jimmy Dean turkey sausage links (gotta watch my cholesterol), and Folgers coffee freshly brewed by Master Barrista Mr. Coffee. Total cost: I dunno, whatever I paid for all of it at BJ's Wholesale. Compliments to the chef (who would happen to be me.) From there came the big decision of the morning: Will I put on clothes or play in my underwear? I'm a guy, so obviously, underwear wins. Ha ha! You can't do that in AC! (Without getting escorted off the floor by security anyway).
    I plug my laptop computer into my flatscreen TV with an HDMI cable and hook up my wireless keyboard/mouse combo by USB, then sit down on the couch. Much more comfortable than most casino seats. Then, I scroll through my online gaming offers. Hmm... Looks like Caesars is offering the best bonus for me. Caesars, it is.
    I think I'll play some JoB VP, even though I generally suck at VP because I really lack patience. $10 a hand? Why not? I load up a grand. Let's go to town on this bad boy.
    I play for a couple hours. Quite a few flushes, a bunch of straights, a couple 4OAKs. Not too shabby. My bankroll is holding up nicely. Starting to get a little thirsty. Where's the cocktail waitress? Oh, yeah, I forgot. My wife had to work today. I'll have to serve myself.
    I'm out of beer after last night's soccer game on TV. What's in the liquor cabinet? Root beer vodka? What the heck is my wife buying these days? A bottle of Jack Daniels that I confiscated from a friend who is cheating on AA? Okay, that'll do. I pour myself a Jack and Coke Zero, stick a dollar bill in my pocket for good service, and plop myself back down on the couch.
    Crap. The game timed out while I was waiting for beverage service. Gotta log back in. I hope Total Rewards doesn't count this as a new gaming session. I think they tally up tier credits and rewards credits at the end of each month for online play, but I don't know how they determine sessions. I would ask customer service about it, but the last time I called them the CSRs seemed barely able to hold a conversation with another human being. Guess I'll find out later.
    I log back in with drink on the coffee table in front of me. Back to VP. Two pair, 3OAK, Aces, Straight. Nothing too big going on, but my play is going strong. Having some fun now. I like that I can swear at the game really loudly and nobody gets upset about it. Going, going, going... 4OAK. I realize at this moment that I should be taking screenshots of this, so I can make a really fun TR like flysrb, but I'm so deep into things now that I decide to do that next time.
    Uh oh. Gotta use the bathroom. That drink went right through me. What if someone steals my lucky machine? Ha ha! Can't happen unless someone breaks into my house. I use the facilities with record speed to avoid timing out again.
    Back to the game. Bankroll slowly disappearing. Almost out... 4OAK! Back in the game. Hours pass. I'm still playing. Starting to get a little peckish. Okay, time to stop and have a sumptuous lunch of a Meatballs and Mozzarella Lean Pocket, a yogurt, and some Crystal Lite. The meal is comped? Why, thank you, Chez Lithium! I had no idea my play was good enough for that.
    After lunch, I decided to stop play for the day and go lounge on my back patio and watch the bird feeder. Who needs the beach when you have a backyard, right? Right? (*whimper*) Final damage: $650 in losses all told. Not too shabby.
    So, overall, playing at home instead of playing at Caesars AC:
    Pros: Didn't have to drive for two hours, no waiting for drink service, nobody complaining about swearing, no need to wear pants.
    Cons: No buffet, I make a really ugly cocktail waitress, no beach, bathroom was filthy (Okay, that one is my own fault).

    Would I recommend New Jersey's internet gambling? Sure, if you get ditched by your friend and can't go to AC.
     
  2. tringlomane

    tringlomane STP Addicted Beer Snob

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    Nice write up there. :evillaugh What kind of paytable they give you? 8/5 because it's Loveman?

    Be careful though, convenience is the devil.

    <--- was majorly addicted to online poker for 6 years until "Black Friday" hit. Replaced that addiction mainly with this site...:eek:
     
  3. dewey089

    dewey089 Guru of Value

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    Great write up and so generous to invite the entire discussion board to meet at your house for the next session.
     
  4. lithium78

    lithium78 High-Roller

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    It's actually 9/6 Jacks or Better, so I would have pretty good odds if I wasn't such a crappy VP player. I think CET is really trying to promote online gambling in NJ, so the pay tables are pretty decent.

    - - - Updated - - -

    I can't guarantee everyone's meals will be comped here. That would depend on your host (who would happen to be me) and whether I remember to stock up on Lean Pockets on my next grocery run.
     
  5. sandybeachbar

    sandybeachbar Low-Roller

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    <3 this post!
     
  6. Clubmaster

    Clubmaster Tourist

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    And you saved gas and toll as well.
     
  7. undathesea

    undathesea Grandissimo

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    Nice write up! Clean your bathroom. :beer:
     
  8. grosx2

    grosx2 VIP Whale

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    LOL great report!
     
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