A tale of one city.... A degenerate trip report. Howdy folks, After reading the trip reports from Natedog, Squidward and my fellow Toronto-ish canuck The Infamous Royal Flusher it was almost mandatory that I share our latest adventure from the proper city of lights. A little background here. I usually am a low-key typical hockey watching, beer/scotch drinking, Wynn staying VP and roulette player, however this trip was with my colleagues. We're all a bunch of dudes on a specialized law enforcement team working at Toronto international airport, so you can imagine the personalities. The trip was as such: - Staying 5 nights around the strip and to maximize and use all comps available at all MGM locals and no play them in return for Natedog! - To attempt to experience downtown Vegas for the first time properly with sneering old hawaiian ladies and Kelly the bartender. - To attempt to hit multiple handpays in the same trip on both high-limit slots and VP! So here we go...: Day 0. With the trip being planned, arranged and discussed for a couple months ahead of time, the day before we were to leave was torture. My pal Shorty and I were supposed to take off on the morning Air FU Canada flight at 8:45am the next day and we had just started work on the night shift. All dressed in uniform, holding our gats in our hand, looking at each other with such Vegas longing that only two heterosexual men can share with each other that we said, "F it." and ran upstairs to departures. We then threaten, bribe, beg, cry, laugh hysterically and pretend to seize the aircraft itself in order to get the Air Canada rep to change our tickets to leave that night. Of course being degenerates we have our suitcases in the office ready to go just incase something like this were to happen. After about 20 minutes of the rep being on the phone and a mandatory change fee applied, (Yes, no perks here in Toronto folks), we were confirmed on the 8:45pm departure that night! I make a quick phone call to the Aria and get them to add on an extra night to our reservation and a quick call to the wife saying that we're involved in a deep cover assignment for the evening and i'll call her from Vegas tomorrow! She'll never know! She reads this forum though... hmm... Anyways, we check-in, drop the bags, head to the lounge for some free Harp beer on tap and text our K-9 officer Ange whom already is in Vegas waiting for us that we're arriving a night early. Flight was uneventful, had 4 scotch and snored the whole way down.... Shorty watched a couple romantic comedies. He claims Clint has never been the same since 'The Bridges of Madison County'. We arrived on time, hopped in a cab and booted it along Swenson to the strip. A quick 20 to the cabbie, including tip, we entered into the vanilla scented casino smiling from ear to ear. Thinking I had just conquered the gods themselves to get here a night early I hear a loud baritone voice scream out "Hey you a$$holes! Aboot time ya showed yerselves up!" Ange in all his glory meets us in the lobby. Imagine a 6'4" tall, white guy of greek decent, who wears small t-shirts for his x-large frame and with a Northern Ontario accent and you have our friend Ange. I go check in for 3 nights with two of them comp'd. We get a basic room with two queens. Perfect for our requirements. We drop off the bags and head over to the Monte Carlo for some very eager and degenerate drinking. It's a tradition that we hit up Andre's for a cigar and scotch when we get together but when we got there, it was closed! For shame! so we decide to sit at the bar below and start drinking. The bartender Joe, nice guy from Iowa, is immediately innundated with requests from the three of us hoolighans. I start with a Tom Collins, Shorty with a makers mark and Ange with a beer and it continues this way for about two hours.... finally after the gin catches up with me I decide it would be a fantastic idea to start drinking 18 year old McCallen. Shorty is on board and Ange is too enamoured with his relfection in the granite counter to disagree with the 30 dollar drinks. Joe, climbs the ladder, brings down the fancy bottle, and gets out these really nice highball glasses... to which I scream out "SHOTS!". Joe, whom later claims he has never had anyone shoot 18 year old McCallen simply laughs and agrees and the three of us and downing 3-4 shots each of the glorious scotch in 30 minutes. Feeling the effects of chasing gin with scotch it's time to gamble. I go find a roulette table just packed with hot asian girls. I turn into the Canadian Casanova and hit a tear teaching the numbers game to these 3 girls in my immediate vacinity. While doing that, the other two guys start wandering around and I lose track of them until about 25 minutes later I see to my left, on one of those dancing stages that the girls use to shake 'their thang', a Michael Jackson impersonater... really not doing a poor job at all until Ange starts scream singing 'Billy Jean' at the blackjack table across the asile. I grab up my chips, tell the ladies that "Ya him over there... I'm so proud of him, i'll be right back." go get Ange before he's climbing to get on stage himself and have a dance-off with the professional. Shorty says the magic words of "Let's go get a pie" (pizza to those non-canucks) and gets Ange's attention away from doing any permenant damage to the stage infrastructure. We go to the Monte Carlo food court and the booze is really starting to hit us all hard... we grab some slices and decide to head back over to the Aria to crash. Ange heads up to his room at the Carlo, Shorty and I head back to the Aria. Before I leave the Carlo decide to grab some clamato and buds for the drink of the morning at the sundries spot... beer and clamato, gotta love it. Shorty kept going to the Aria and I'd meet him there. When I was stumbling out of the sundires shop two of the three asian girls were there and struck up a conversation. They asked me if I would be a gentleman and walk them to their room.... in my drunken logic I thought that would be a fantastic idea and that my wife would commend me of helping two lost souls find there way. So I do, we get there, they invite me in, I say I can't I gotta go get back to my own room. They on queue turn into these lusty Sirens and one begs me to come in and help them get into bed while the other reaches for the package! I bolt! No words, no waiting, just running with a six back of bud in my left arm and a bottle of tomato juice in the other. I make it back to the Aria, out of breath and convinced that I lost them along the way.... I would only know for sure tomorrow...... TBC! p.s. a couple photos attached of some quick VP quads (both Q's!) while wandering around the Monte Carlo before getting started in the festivities. More photos to come later!