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The Worst Vegas Trip Ever

Discussion in 'Vegas Trip Reports' started by dfalk, Oct 14, 2013.

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  1. dfalk

    dfalk VIP Whale

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    My Trip Report

    I didn't plan on writing this TR because it was so bad, but after being home for a few days all I can do it laugh about it and move on. This TR is gonna suck so only continue on if you're extremely bored.

    This trip was planned as a quick cheap trip to hold me over till my big birthday bash in March. I went with my good Vegas buddy and we stayed downtown this time to change things up a bit. Trip was originally planned for 10/7 - 10/10 at the Four Queens

    MON 10/7
    Get to the airport about 12:30PM walk through security boarded the plane right away and we're off. About an hour into the 2 hour flight some guy had a medical emergency and they asked for any doctors onboard. I thought oh great we're gonna have to make an emergency landing. Thankfully we didn't have to and land on time but had to sit at the gate for like 20 min while the medics boarded the plane and took care of him. Must not of been anything to serious cause their sure took their sweet ass time getting him off.

    Get off the plane and rush to the bus stop to see the WAX just taking off, son of a bitch! Just then the 109 bus shows up, I thought I read on here that this bus will get your downtown too so we hop on that. Well after talking to people on the bus no one knows how to ride the damn bus and everyone has a different answer. We get off at some intersection in the ghetto. Anyways we figure out where the hell we're going, hop on the Sahara Express bus then transfer to the SDX bus and finally make it downtown.
    Get to Four Queens and check in only to find out they only have rooms with 1 bed, but they'll give us a roll away, just great. Got a room in the north tower on the 6th floor which actually had a sweet view of Fremont so that was pretty nice.

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]

    Trip is already off to a not so great start. Only thing I know of to make me feel better is booze and gambling. I think I proceeded to down like 10 beers in an hour and now I'm feeling much better. The only thing I really remember is losing my ass at blackjack. I walked to damn near every casino trying to change my luck but nothing, nada zilch. Finally head to my room and called it a night around 3-4AM I think.

    TUE 10/8
    Wake up around noon today and am feeling pretty good till I go to the safe. Last night I somehow managed to spend $540 of the $600 I brought for the whole trip, son of a bitch! Looks like I already have to go to the ATM and it's only day 2. Anyways we get ready and head down to Magnolias for some breakfast. I had an omelet which was really good, and with a 2 for 1 coupon the bill was only like $13.

    I remembered reading the El Cortez gives you 5% in freeplay if you use their ATM so we walked down there so I could get some more money. Got the money and FP which I burned through in about 34 seconds with no wins. After that we just walked all over downtown checking out all the hotels and drinking lots of beer. It's like 8, feeling pretty drunk so figure we better get some food in us. Ended up at Binions Cafe and got the Binion burger. Damn that thing was the best deal at only $5, highly recommended.

    After eating we went to The D and played some sigma derby for a couple hours. Didn't really win anything but didn't lose much either. After this I went back to the Four Queens to play some more BJ and I lost my ass again. I just couldn't get on a winning streak. Don't really remember anything else except that I got pretty wasted and went to bed around 5AM.

    WED 10/9
    Woke up around 1PM today and felt like shit! I needed food so bad so I ran down to the Subway really quick and got myself a foot long. Today was out last full day and didn't have a single thing planned. We walked around a lot, drank a lot of beer, played some live keno, and some slots here and there. Nothing exciting happened but we were having a good time.

    Figured we should probably eat dinner and since we both enjoyed Binions Cafe last night we ended up there again. Nice quick, cheap, easy food. After that I ended up at a BJ table at Fremont. I was playing with a great group of people and was doing fairly decent. I was thinking all right I might make all my money back that I lost the previous nights. Hahaha, ya right, what a fucking idiot I am for thinking that. Ended up losing all my money once again, but I had a good time and got nice and drunk. It was close to 3AM so I headed back to the Four Queens since I had to get up at 6AM for my flight.

    On my way home I hear "Hey!", I just keep walking then another "HEY YOU!" I turn around and this 300lb black-booty-ho was like "Ya I'm talking to you!" and it went something like this:
    ME: uhhh yaa what's up?
    BBH: Where you going?
    ME: To my room
    BBH: Can I join you?
    ME: Sure, how much are you going to pay me?
    BBH: Oh no honey, you gotta pay me.
    ME: hahahahaha, Fuck that shit, quit wasting my time!

    I then just walked off and she said something back to me but I couldn't make it out. Anyways to bed I go.

    THUR 10/10
    Remember how I said I had to wake up at 6AM to catch my flight that was at 8:25? Don't know what the fuck happened but me and my buddy both slept through our alarms and woke up at 7:30. We raced as fast as we could and hoped onto the WAX, got to the airport at 8:20 only to be told the flight is already on the runway, MOTHER FUCKER!!!! Allegiant air is always late why, just for once, couldn't it be late today. I've never missed a flight before but was pretty much told sucks for you!

    So now we're stuck in the airport and it's time for plan B. Get on our phones to see what our options are. They were the following: fly out today on Delta for $600, rent a car for $400 and drive 12 hours, or stay another night and fly out tomorrow on Allegiant for $144. We chose the $144 route. So we buy our tickets for $144 which fucking sucked cause that's what I paid for my original round trip.

    Now we need a place to stay. My buddy logged into TR and got us a comped room at Bally's, so we get back on the bus and head to the strip. We walk around till 3PM when we can get checked in. By now I'm feeling like shit, all that booze from the previous nights is hitting me, and I'm just sick of Vegas and want to be home. I proceed to take a nap till about 9. Get up and walk down to PH to eat some Earl's. Still feeling like crap I head back to the room and am in bed by 12AM, feeling like a giant pussy.

    FRI 10/11
    Let's try this again! I sleep in till 11, get checked out and head to the airport 3 hours early, no way in hell I'm missing this flight. I sit around and watch Netflix for a couple hours then board the plan for the 4:40PM flight. Just as it looks like we were getting ready to get taxied they announced a flight attendant had a sudden death in the family and that we had to deboard. You have got to be fucking kidding me, can this trip get any worse? So we get off and wait for about 30 mins and then we board again and take off about an hour late.

    We are just getting ready to land and all I'm thinking is thank god I'm so happy to be home. Oh wait there's one more "fuck you" in store for me, kaaaboom! we land so hard the whole plane screams and I thought the lady in front of me was gonna have a heart attack. It was one of the roughest landings I've ever experienced. But we all survived and I was finally home!


    Notes:
    -This was by far the worst trip I've ever had in my life. If this would of been my first Vegas trip I would of never came back.

    -Downtown fucking sucks!! We were so bored down there. We like to walk around with beers in hand, we found you could walk all of Fremont street in about 5 minutes before your had to turn around and walk it all again. Will never stay there again and will probably only come back if someone else in the group wants to see it.

    -Downtown is also a retirement home. Just a bunch of old people with little to no excitement and no hot chicks at all. As soon as I got to the strip you could feel a whole different vibe and there are waaaaaay more hotties.

    -With a trip as bad as this my next one can only get better. I ended up spending more than twice the amount of what I planned on.

    -Hopefully someone can learn from this TR and not do Vegas the way I did.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Oct 15, 2013
  2. Kickin

    Kickin Flea

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    This report cracked me up. You are fucking hilarious! :nworthy:

    Sorry for finding so much humor in your pain. LOL :poke:
     
  3. billduhcat

    billduhcat Low-Roller

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    Been there done that, more often than I want to admit, unfortunately.
     
    Big Game 2017 == Vegas XXVI
  4. BlueSkadoo

    BlueSkadoo VMB Sweetheart

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    Good trip report. Every Vegas trip isn't sunshine and roses...thank you for being realistic!
     
  5. floridavegas

    floridavegas Low-Roller

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    My thoughts exactly! Thank you!
     
  6. casinoboy

    casinoboy Low-Roller

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    too bad for your trip. i had my butt kicked at the casino last nite too. :cry:
     
  7. OnTheHorizon

    OnTheHorizon Low-Roller

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    Thanks for sharing!

    Hope your next trip to Vegas is coming up soon and you have a M-U-C-H better time!
     
  8. Big Tip

    Big Tip VIP Whale

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    Guilty as well.

    I also enjoyed it because misery loves company. My last trip, a few weeks ago, was like this. It sucked. Couldn't win at anything. I never even had a fun session. It was sit down at a blackjack table, lose everything in 20 minutes, dare the dealer to do that again by buying in again, lose everything in 15 minutes! Arggggg!

    I can almost stand losing if I get to play for awhile. I swear I thought I was on camera getting punked. It was that bad.
     
  9. worldtraveler661

    worldtraveler661 VIP Whale

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    Yes it is.. 12 times a year.. and its cause I never stay in Downtown. haha :p


    This is the funniest TR ever read on here. Thanks for the details. Sorry you had a bad time man. I was just in Vegas over the weekend and I would say it was on my top 5 out of probably 120+ trips. Theres always a next time. At least the next trip, it'll be easy to top. :)
     
  10. BeeeJay

    BeeeJay President of The Red Lobster Hostess Satisfaction

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    Fucking awesome report....sounds like brutal trip. The airplane stuff alone makes this a VMB Instant Classic!
     
  11. breanna61

    breanna61 Super Moderator

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    Sorry for finding the report funny, but hey your next trip can only get better. You aren't the first person to miss a return flight; I've missed one and almost missed another but lucked out when the flight was late. I was so hung over/still half-drunk on the one I made, I'm pretty sure the poor bastard sitting next to me got drunk just sitting there.
     
  12. casinoboy

    casinoboy Low-Roller

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    is off strip more fun then downtown? :poke: i thought those would be the most boring hotels.
     
  13. dvandentop

    dvandentop VIP Whale

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    oh yeah i went downtown on my last 4 day trip for about 4 hours in afternoon it was totally lame and prob wont go back either, been to vegas many times but it has just lost it's fun downtown to me.
     
  14. worldtraveler661

    worldtraveler661 VIP Whale

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    I visit Vegas monthly for different reasons so I mix it up a bit. I've stayed at Southpoint since I have my race trailer with me 3-4 times a year and SP has a big parking available for that. Im limited those trips on how much I roam around but Im ok with being there for sleeping and a couple meals.

    I've done family trips where we just hang out at Cancun or Tahiti Village for a couple days. We'll head to the strip for a bit to eat.

    But 80% of the time, I stay at strip hotels. Much more choices within a walking distance even though you dont need to see and do everything around you. Who would ever say they got bored on the strip. Its impossible. LOL :)
     
  15. DonkHappens

    DonkHappens Low-Roller

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    Bad day(few days) in Vegas still beats the hell out of a good day at work, imo.
     
  16. bigsuv

    bigsuv Low-Roller

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    those movie guys should put some of these to the next hangover movie :haha:. sorry to hear what happened but your report is funny as hell :thumbsup:.
     
  17. IWannaBeInVegas

    IWannaBeInVegas VIP Whale

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    Downtown is fun in the evening and night, I was bored during the day
     
    Tentative Arrival
  18. ams722

    ams722 Side Bet Shunner

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    Agreed.

    I'm 25 and I can't imagine ever staying downtown.

    My buddies and I have made a couple trips there before and every time, it's like we get there and like 5 minutes later we have seen everything we need to see and are ready to leave. We always end up bitching about what a waste of time that was and that it wasn't worth the cab fares to get there and back. Just not our vibe.
     
  19. wigwam_salesman

    wigwam_salesman VIP Whale

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    You got a great anecdote out of it at least. Every cloud and that...
     
  20. ex507

    ex507 Low-Roller

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    Sorry for having such a horrible trip... But... I laughed my ass off. The way you write this stuff down is f***ing hilarious!!!!!!! Thank you, this TR made my day!!!
    Greetz from germany, cant wait to stay downtown!!!!!! Harrharrharrr
     
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