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Strip club blue balls(NSFW)(no cucumbers)

Discussion in 'Vegas Trip Reports' started by user3657, Sep 11, 2015.

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  1. user3657

    user3657 High-Roller

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    My Trip Report

    I hope you will beable to get some laughs out of this story at my expense :)

    I have not been to vegas in a little over a year so I was past due for some stripclub fun. I either go to vegas with friends or go solo, and my routine is the same. I like to visit Rhino and just "hang out". Its just my thing, if I am bored ill just go hang out early morning and then ill walk back to my hotel and get some breakfast. Sometimes I dont even get any dances. Everyone has that one thing, some people "people watch", walk the strip, jog, alone time, whatever. I'll go to rhino by myself, and just get some alone time listing to music, how im going to make my next $, trying to solve the worlds problems and watching everyone have a good time. I've never had any problems and in the past girls would chat and not even ask for a dance because they knew me.

    I did this 2 nights this trip and did not get a dance. The "3rd" night, I had a late start going out. I'm 30 and visit vegas for the food and night clubs. This night I took a nap and after I finished some work and ate "dinner", I did not make it to Marquee nightclub till 3:30. First time I ever heard this in vegas but they said they were not letting anyone else in and were closing soon. The strip was dead, and the doormen were removing all the ropes so I left it be. I knew Drais would be open on a Holiday.

    On my way to Drais, hoping to get the night started. No line, great. I know it has to be busy downstairs though, it has to be labor day! Nope! so I get to the cashier, and I see all the doormen and servers standing against the bar looking bored. Honestly, must be atleast 6 of them lined up. Instead of paying, I told them ill check back later, the cashier smiled and said "yeh, its dead".

    Its now about 4am, and I have Rhino in the back of my mind. I walk past the piano bar at harrahs, and thats close. I know they close early, but myself and my friend have had some great late nights there on holiday weekds. I walk up to venation and the strip is dead, nothing but hookers.

    I make up my mind to go to Rhino, and this time spend some money. My wallet is still full, and I did plan on having some "fun" this trip.

    Rhino has the best action going on right now then anywhere on the strip and its now 4:30-5am. Thats why I love vegas. 24.7.

    This night I sit on the ground level and after a few dances Ive found my girlfriend for the night. :thumbsup: She does not know it but ive already decided she can have everything in my wallet. :drunk::drunk:: She even got me into the back room. And to me that is the biggest waste of money :eek: I come for titties in my face and you can get that in the main room. She must of mistakenly forgot to mention the drink requirement,:beer:as that was mentioned I refused to pay but then she picked up the drinks.

    30mins later we are back outside. Nothing special has happened, im bored, and still want to spend $$. I've never done this but i asked her to come back to my room. We set everything up and she'll meet me at xx and drive me to my room. I was not expecting any "extras" or the like, I knew what this was. I just wanted to get some more dances. She was just some petite asain that smelled good and I was :licklips:

    I dont even sit for 2mins at our meeting spot, and she is there. She asks if we can go to her place instead, the business side of me was saying great, how convenient for her, do her job, kick me out, then she can sleep and im stuck trying to find a way home. The cheap side of me used this as an excuse not to tip :)

    We get to her place, she gives me a tour, blah blah blah, and the fun starts. Again, im still not thinking this is anything more then what it is..
    After about 20mins of her dancing, I am :licklips::eek::nworthy: She is only topless, and nothing inappropriate has happened but at this point I am very confused. LOL. The way she is dancing and teasing, she is one of the best strippers I must say. :licklips::licklips::drunk: I was fully seduced...Nothing like back at Rhino....Does she? No....im paying her....Wait, she does? Nooo she doesnt, wait.......can it be, my good looks and charm has finally worked!!

    Ok, at this point in my little mind I have decided she would like my hotdog inside her bun(joking), at this very moment as the wires criss cross in my brain I put her on the corner of her couch, her phone rings.

    Is this some kind of sick joke? Does God not know why I am single? I'll sit on one side of the road and starve before ill make the decision to cross the road to eat.

    Apparently its her elderly neighbor, that wanted to make sure she is safe and to come outside for a min. As she is outside, it feels like highschool all over again with dads getting in the way. :licklips::licklips: This just adds to the suspense.

    She was gone for 2mins, and yes, back to the action!!! I am finally going to get some......I know it......fast forward some and I really think I am going to get some......

    Well, you guessed it. I was rejected, every time LOL :thumbsup:

    On the way out, I felt like a kid on a bad date. I kicked every rock in my way and said next time. Maybe she was just playing hard to get?


    I hope this is not to long and your able to find the humor in this. I tried to get some laughs writing this, hopefully I did. I can look back and laugh at myself. This is one vegas story ill be telling for years.
     
  2. BlacklabberMike

    BlacklabberMike VIP Whale

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    she's goooooood. played you like a trout.
     
  3. PayTriple

    PayTriple The Cucumber King

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    How much did you give her, after leaving the club?
     
  4. 1slomofo

    1slomofo Tourist

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    hahaha man... thats terrible...


    How was her place? Apartment?
     
  5. user3657

    user3657 High-Roller

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    LOL, really nice. Yes it was an apartment. I DO believe her story that she says she only commutes on the weekends. I have thought about moving to vegas for the cost of living and this whole area was a legitly nice area. I did not see any characters on her street or complex and the mcd's we stopped at was extremely clean.
     
  6. 6Mermaids

    6Mermaids Low-Roller

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    When she went outside to meet her "elderly neighbor", did you see if that is who she was actually meeting?
     
  7. Mirageluvr

    Mirageluvr Low-Roller

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    That's some interesting and funny stuff right there. Thanks for sharing. :wink2:.
     
  8. user3657

    user3657 High-Roller

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    LOL, I heard a women on the phone, and did not feel like I was in any danger so I really didnt care. Did she text someone eariler to let them know, I dont know. I did hear women voices. I really did not have any thought of anything bad happening though.

    The phone call was just too funny, perfect timing. You would have to be there.
     
  9. PayTriple

    PayTriple The Cucumber King

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    Maybe she had a webcam in the room so her friend could monitor the situation?
    I am paranoid about this type of thing, which can lead to blackmail, so I always insist on hosting.
     
  10. 1slomofo

    1slomofo Tourist

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    There is a Tom Clancy book that uses this same technique to blackmail some important dude at a large company...

    What is it that you do for work exactly PT??? LMAO
     
  11. user3657

    user3657 High-Roller

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    Glad nothing happened, because if there was, I would expect some kind of payment for my performance. :)
     
  12. boogaloobboy

    boogaloobboy Tourist

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    You could gave had a much better time with much less bullshit with one of the "hookers" you malign at Venetian. Life really pounds these points home sometimes...
     
  13. PayTriple

    PayTriple The Cucumber King

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    I could tell you, but then you'd have to be liquidated.....just kidding!
     
  14. Nevyn

    Nevyn VIP Whale

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  15. tringlomane

    tringlomane STP Addicted Beer Snob

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    Being teased sucks. Nice write up though!
     
  16. FullBoat

    FullBoat VIP Whale

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    Man oh Man. That just sucks, and not in a good way either. Maybe you could have taken the left overs on the strip back to your hotel.
     
  17. dutchvelvet

    dutchvelvet VIP Whale

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    Sorry things didn't finish as you hoped. If you do take out again PT is right, it's good to host.
     
  18. breanna61

    breanna61 Super Moderator

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    At least you didn't lose a kidney. There's a sucker born every minute.
     
  19. Gamesman

    Gamesman VIP Whale

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    She was good to go, you moved too slow. She didn't invite you to her place to give you a lap dance.
     
  20. Packer

    Packer VIP Whale

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    PT, you can't be too paranoid in las vegas. I'm the same way.
     
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