Valentines day, Left Albuquerque at 8:30 and arrived in Phoenix at 9:50 on time. We hoped to catch one of the earlier flights from PHX to LAS as they added some between our 3 hour layover. I originally left plenty cushion because we did the two separate round trips trick through Southwest to get 4 segments instead of 2â€¦ Anyway, because we paid the $29 discount fare they normally donâ€™t let you change flights without paying. However, when we got to PHX, I went to the passenger service counter to get our next set of tickets and they were collecting donations for the Ronald McDonald house. So I told the clerk, I would put $20 in the boot if she got us on the earlier flight. She said sure, so off we were in no time to LAS and saved a couple hours of layover! LAS, caught a cab to Harrahs and were at the checkin counter before noon! No line in the Platinum line so got right to counter. I knew not to dare try the $20 trick as Valentines was booked solid. However, the gal was really nice and said she could move us to the Carnival tower 27th floor with a view of strip. Cool, I pulled out a $10 and thanked her. We got to room, which was nice and had a great view of the Mirage and volcano. I had ordered 1-800-flowers candy box ahead of time and had it delivered to the room. Nice surprise for the Mrs. Then we headed down to start the gambling and debauchery! We realized, since we got in early, we could try to squeeze in the Mac King show that started at 1:00pm. So down to the players club to beg for free tickets. She gave them no problem and off we went. The show was good. I do remember some of the skit as I saw it less than a year ago. It was still funny and a good time! After the show, it was time to gamble! We hit a double diamond dollar bank dubbed as 98% payback. (JOKE) We went through a couple hundred in no time! Time to slow down already. We hit a few nickel and quarter slots. No luck. Decided to check out my sports bets from online. No luck. OK time to regroup. Harrahs picked up right where it left off last time, crappyâ€¦as it was mid afternoon and I had seen that the Tequila Joes next door had 2-1 drinks 4-7pm, so off to IP we went. Well the special was not on this weekend because of the holidaysâ€¦ So, we went inside IP and grabbed a Margarita and a fruity drink. Then we went to players club to get new cards. Next door was the Austin Powers nickels (both our favorite machines)! So we played awhile on them all the time drinking more. Eventually, our nickels ran out and we decided to head to the tables. We sat down at a BJ table 6 deck $5 minimum. The gal at the table was a little too quiet for our liking but we hung in there with her and played awhile. I was going back and forth from 5-10. Then a pit boss came by and mumbled something about â€œyou have to play $10 minimum ALL THE TIME to get ratedâ€â€¦ Screw her! Anyway, I upped to $10 just to shut her up as I was doing ok anyway. Then a nicer dealer came by. He looked older and you could tell he had been at it many years. We asked him how many and he said 30 years! We played a bit longer and my wife decided to wonder around a bit. Then when the table emptied, a couple hotties from LA sat down and started chatting right away with the dealer as they were all from Calif. My luck held out a bit longer, but one of the girls was betting wrong, and soon the tides began to swing. I picked up the signal to get out and took my small winnings to go find the Mrs. Well after 20 minutes of wandering, I find her at the Elvis machine with over 600 credits! Score. So she cashed that in and we decided to head back as it was getting close to our 7:00pm reservation at CafÃ© Andretti. At 7, we got to the restaurant and they gave us a wonderful booth table in a corner. The food at the CafÃ© Andretti is always good and they have a great menu selection of traditional Italian at a reasonable price, $15-20 per plate. We got a bottle of wine to drink with the meal, a nice Italian Merlot at about $40 per bottleâ€¦ being Valentines day it was a nice dinner. Well the alcohol started kicking in overdrive. So when the gal came to take our pictures, we were all over that. She came back later to show us them and actually they turned out good. So I asked how much for the whole package and I think her jaw dropped to the floor. It was a little over $100 for all pictures and I felt bad as I could tell she does not sell too many, so bought the whole deal. I could tell she was happy about that so felt good that we are able to make someones day who has to work so hard for so littleâ€¦ Well my wife had too much wine and said she was going to be sick so she ran off to the room and I stayed for the bill. By the time I got to the room, it was almost 10pm and I was just as drunk as her so we both crashed. In fact, I passed out with my good clothes onâ€¦ 15th. Sunday, up at 8:00 am and got ready for a whole new start. I headed to the sports book after showering and told the Mrs to meet me their after she was done getting ready. I sat down and played a 25 cent VP while checking the odds. I cussed when I saw the news as it flashed across the neon scoreboard that A-Rod was now a Yankeeâ€¦ â€œSALARY CAPâ€ I mumbledâ€¦ Oh well, when I got back this week I learned Maddox signed with my Cubbies!!! Anyway, I placed a couple B-ball bets and the Mrs showed up with her left over spaghetti hoping to get it warmed up at the sports bar. No luck as the kitchen did not open until 10. So the bartender gave her a fork and she ate it cold while I had a couple Bloody Maryâ€™s. (Only a true Italian)â€¦ Anyway, I played a long time on $10 in the VP before giving up and deciding we should try one more stint at the Harrahs slotsâ€¦ Well to make it short and sour, we played Sunday at Harrahs and lost a bunch!!! So by mid day, I was sick of the joint and decided that we should go back to IP as we did better there. We went right to the craps table and I bought in for a $200 while the Mrs said she was going to check out the gift shops. Right away, an unfriendly box man told me that I had to bet $10 ALL THE TIME to get rate. I looked at him and shook my head while ignoring his comment. The table was a $3 minimum, so I told him I go up and down as I please! The first guy who was rolling was on fire! I bet conservative placing the 6 and 8 for $3 each and betting the pass line. He must have rolled 30 times or more before finally 7â€™ outâ€¦ Well then it went down hill from there. The dice moved around the table and no-one including me could hit squat! In fact, the couple times that I rolled, as soon as I hit a point, 7â€™! Sh!t I gasped each time. Meanwhile, Mr lucky left the tableâ€¦ So I got off within an hour and met up with the Mrs. By this time I had a real good buzz going as the drinks At IP are made real strong! So we played slots a while and I played a VP 25 cent 9/6 for a long timeâ€¦ before cashing in up $30. We noticed by now that our comps were adding up fast and we were not even playing that heavy at IP. All in all for the time at IP today, we were only down a littleâ€¦ It was close to 7pm, so back to Harrahs to catch our reservation at the Range steakhouse. We love this place and they have the best Garlic Mashed tators, along with a bone in Fillet for a reasonable price of around $30. We were both too full to have their always excellent cheesecake. So after dinner, we went down to play a little more. I decided to hit the Triple shot game in the party pit. It is a fun game and I always seem to do ok at it. Cheryl the dealer was nice and I actually came out ahead $25 after playing for an hour or two! Then we wandered a bit, braved the high stakes only to flush another onion ($100) down the toilet. OK, enough Harrahs, I decided it was time for the Monte Carlo Poker room! So we caught a taxi and were there by 10pm. I got right in a 2-4 game, bought in for $200 and the Mrs went off to see the shops and casino. Unfortunately, the table was full! I mean Full! I was playing with 10 people! It took me awhile to adjust to betting with this many people. By this time, I was down about an onion, when I decided to stretch. So I went to the boys room, came back and bought in another $100 (bully power)â€¦ About that time, the tides turned. I started to get the hang of the table. I was dealt a 4-7 on the blind. Well naturally, I decided to be a joker and raise for the fun of it because I could tell no-one got a good hand. The flop came 7,7,4!!! Now I am excited! I bluffed after a couple people raised and just called. The turn card was a Jack, So I just called the guy who raised. Then the river came 9â€¦ The guy raised again, but I could tell that best he had by his actions was the 10,8 in his pocket, so I re-raised! He called and his jaw dropped as he realized that I flopped the full house! That began a brief streak as I took down a few more good potsâ€¦ Then the tides went right back out! I started getting aggressive. I seemed to always catch the second best hand. With out giving away my betting style to the boys who will meet up with me during MM, I will just say that I soon was down to just $100 again. Well the Mrs showed up, so I decided to turn into a pumpkin shortly after midnight and call it a night! 16th Monday, we slept in till about 9:00am. Got up and showered, then went to the players club at Harrahs to get our â€œFREEâ€ leather jacket. Well, by now this â€œFREEâ€ leather jacket had cost us about $1,500â€¦ Being disgusted with the luck at Harrahs, we decided to head down to Luxor as it was our first ever LV stay. Well, we hit the Luxor magic $1 machine and lost a $100 right away. So the Mrs caught the gift shops while I tried to recoupâ€¦ I hit a quarter machine for mixed 7â€™s of 100 and then played nickels awhile. I was begging for a drink, but the service at Luxor is nothing compared to Harrahs! Now I remember the only reason I ever drink the â€œHarrahs kool-aidâ€! The service we get! So we decided to make our way back up the strip. We went through the Ex-Calibur and dropped another $40, then to MGM for another $40, then onto Tropicana. We had free tickets to see Rick Thomas or Follies. So we decided to play awhile. Still no luck. This was getting to be an old theme! So, after losing some more, we decided to eat lunch at the Calipso, which is always good and catch a taxi back to the only place we had any luck, the IP. Back to IP by mid afternoon. We played slots there awhile and caught the happy hour 2-1 drinks at Tequila Joesâ€¦ Strong drinks! We then went to the slot club to get our comps for a meal. We had $45 in comps! I was happy as we had not played that much there and yet the comps added up fast! So we went to the Mings Chinese for supper. Excellent meal and we had a nice bottle of Wildhorse to go with at a reasonable $30â€¦ The total bill came to less than $10 after comps! After supper, we were good and buzzed, so got an itch to go down town! I told the taxi to take us to Main-Street Station. I never knew, but when we went to the players club, we were told they are not Station casinos! They were part of Boyd (Sams Town)? We sat down at a nice $5 pitch 2 deck game and played BJ for awhile. The Veitnamese dealer was great. He rooted for us, we tipped him, I counted cards, we won, and back and forth. I got up to go to the boys room and got to see the Berlin wallâ€¦ Pretty neat as I am full German by ancestryâ€¦ Then, the dealers changed. A robot from Michigan came in and he seemed smug. You know the type. Happy when you lost. It did not take 3 losing hands for us to decide to get up, accuse the dealer of being a mechanic and shout go HAWKEYES! And leave, coloring up a bit. So out to Fremont street we go, drunk and allâ€¦ We stumbled into what I later learned was the 4-queens. My wife found the carnival quarter bulldozer machine right away to play. I sat next to her, ordered yet another Malibu and Coke. At my disposal was a VP machine. So I slipped in a $20 and decided to play max betâ€¦ ???? Well this max bet VP is not 5, no, no, â€¦ It is 100!!!. So my $20 was gone in one losing hand! Being mad and pissed etcâ€¦, I decided to whip this machine in my drunken state and put another $20 in! Well, I knew to lower the bet down to 5, so I hit the bet button from 80, 79, 78, etc, down to 5, then hit deal. Low and behold (no not a royal) but the $20 was gone again! Now I am really Pissed!!! So I got up to find an attendant. After waiting several minutes, and attendant finally came and after explaining what happened a casino boss came. Low and behold, they gave me 75 quarters back!!!. (Iâ€™ll bet this happens often with this machine)! I then promised to play it back in their casino, before heading directly for the door!!! Off down Fremont street we go. We stumbled into Golden Nugget and I had to use the boys room. So the Mrs said she would meet up after checking the gift shopâ€¦ Well, conveniently, the $5 machines were right in my sight from the restroom. So after the boys room, I hit the $5 machine and dropped an onion inâ€¦ I was drunk, so played 2 at a time. Well after 6 pulls I hit triple diamond with single bars. ($300)!! Woohooâ€¦ The first and only win of the whole trip! Right then the Mrs, comes back to see me cashing out the coins! So we cashed in and headed back to Harrahs. By the time we got to the strip, it was midnight. We hit the High stakes at Harrahs, just to lose back a quick $40â€¦ So I said, enough of this, lets find a place to win! So we stumbled over to Casino Royale. There I found the most handy short (10 feet craps table)! You even had chairs! I bought in for $100 and played the minimum $2 bets. Well they told my wife if she was not playing she could not sit. She got mad and leftâ€¦ I was having too good of luck at this new discovery, so told her I would meet her back at the room. Since I set the dice, I found that it was easier at this short table even when sitting down. The problem was I was drunk, kept ordering more Malibu and Cokes and never got aggressive with my betting. I played for hours. Finally when the dealers switched a few times, I got on a good roll. I made several points and numbers. When it ended, I was up almost double. I had to go to the boys room, so after a quick couple of losing dice throwers, off I went. When I came back, my chip stack seemed dwindled??? I did not say anything at that time as I was drunk and not 100% sure. So after a bit, the tides started turning, I realized it was 4:30 am and I had to leave that day! So I cashed out about even and off to bed. When I got to the room, I started getting mad!!! I realized someone hosed me!!!! So, In my drunken stuper, I called the Casino security to demand a view of the tape! They were not helpful and told me; that would never happen! â€œYa â€“ Rightâ€! Well I was mad! (And Drunk). So I asked for the names and called the Nevada Gaming commission! At 4:45 am I got someone? Although, He was very unhelpful! He did not take me seriously in my stateâ€¦ I was mad! He told me that I could write the commission and gave me the address to write but that was all he would do. He asked me how much I thought was taken, I said around $50 but that I could care less about the money, it was the principal and the fact that it could happen to someone else! He still refused to go look at the tape! By this time I am too tired to argue any more! I realized it was â€œwelcome to Vegasâ€ timeâ€¦ bend over and smile! â€œ Get Screwed and yet never kissedâ€ 17th Tuesday morning, we had to check out. So after sleeping in till 10 because I was up till 5 messing with the gaming commission, we got up and packed. Then we decided to go down, get breakfast as we did not have to check out till 1:00pmâ€¦ So we walked to Oâ€™sheas and ate at BKâ€¦ I played the Jeopardy quarters that I insisted were due! At 4 million, they are due! I played a while after hitting mixed 7â€™s, but never got the bonus. So we went back to Harrahs for one last stand! I found the 45 nickel Diamond machine that gives you actual diamonds on a bonus. Knowing that the Mrs loves this machine, I fed it $100. Well it actually played a long time on that $100. But at 45 nickels a spin, and after one bonus round of â€œraining diamondsâ€ the $100 was gone. I could tell she was sad, so I gave it one more onion! This lasted awhile again and another raining diamonds bonus before running out. At this time, we had to check out and leaveâ€¦ So off to the LAS airport we went Overall, A quick weekend as we normally stay 5 nights and this was just 3â€¦. Gambling was the worst luck we hadâ€¦ We realized that Harrahs kool-aid has a bitter taste. We vowed to play elsewhere more next time! The comps at IP are great! A few hundred of play in, gets you $45 in food comps! Never, ever trust anyone at Casino Royale! The place is a dive, we know it every time we walk in and this time just proved it! I am sorry for those that like the place, but I cannot patronize a place like Casino Royale with such LOW LIFE people that frequent the joint. Sad as it sounds, Iâ€™d rather get my teeth kicked in at the BJ tables of Harrahs than have these low lifes to deal with that you cannot trust at a place like Casino Royale! P.S. I can assure you that even while drunk, I know my chip stacks and I know, some disappeared while I was to the restroomâ€¦ Next time, Trust no-one at CR, play more tables and, Have fun! March Madness T-27!!!