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Nov 9-14 - Caesar's comes to the rescue! or Mandalay Bay Sucks

Discussion in 'Vegas Trip Reports' started by jpw711, Nov 15, 2009.

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  1. jpw711

    jpw711 VIP Whale

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    My Trip Report

    As usual, I planned to take notes, but you know how that goes.

    After the last trip (from hell) with the in-laws, this being the third trip in a row where we have been to LV with them and yelled never again, my wife (Ann) and I went alone, a Stress Free trip!

    Leave the house @ 9AM for the short drive to the Springfield Missouri Airport, arrive at 10:15 for the 11:20 Flight on American Eagle to Dallas to connect. Ann and I have been having a discussion about whether a coffee maker is an acceptable carry on in the eyes of the TSA, me saying no, thinking if I can't take a plastic bottle of water on a plane, there's no way they are going to let this guy stroll on with a big old glass pot, while Ann saying of course they will, just call them and ask. So, going through security, I ask these two lovely ladies who answer yes, of course, wait a few minutes while Ann explains, and then get dissed in the old Women are smarter then Men routine.

    Plane leaves on time, a quick 55 minute flight later followed by 25 years of taxing to the gate, and we are off to find the train to the other terminal. Oh, did I mention that I failed to purchase a belt, so again, the wardrobe malfunction was in full force. What is the deal with clothes that start tight and 2 hours later they loosen to the point of only covering one's ankles?

    Get over to the other gate, look at the security line and clock, have 45 minutes, so outside we go to suck down some nicotine. Ten minutes later, back to security where there might be 10 people in the line. Plenty of time, right? WRONG. With 7 minutes left before our flight leaves, we get through security. The x-ray guy must have been a trainee.

    So off we run, I really didn't know I could run that fast, one hand holding my carry on, the other hand holding on to my pants. But we made it, and didn't have to sit on the plane for 25 minutes before takeoff

    So we get to Vegas, baggage claim is empty, the taxi line is empty, and grab a cab, to go to The hotel at Mandalay Bay. The cabbie gets out, and the first words out of his mouth are "Good, Americans" He then proceeds to tell us how the town is full of Europeans and how they don't tip, and then long hauls us through the tunnel. Guess what, this American doesn't tip long haulers either.

    When I made the reservations at MB, I had an offer for a suite, comped for two days. So I booked it, smoking, the hotel. We reach check in and are told (at 4 PM), we don't have any suites, even though you have a reservations for one that are smoking in The Hotel, would you like to go to MB instead? Not really, how about a non smoking suite we can smoke in (Harrahs does this) She replies, we don't have a problem with that, but the next door people might smell the smoke through the vents and might complain, but I do have a deluxe room on the penthouse floor, it's not a suite, but has a bubble tub in the bathroom, and our suites don't. Ok, now I'm thinking I should be saying, you mean like the one in my bathroom at home, or like the 8 person spa in my sunroom at home, but I keep my mouth shut. Now I was really wanting to stay at the Hotel side, being the first comped offer I had received from MGM after years of staying at the Harrahs properties, and I had heard it was really nice, so we took that room

    It was room 9202, right is right by the elevator and between a huge suite and housekeeping. My master bath at home is larger than this room (and my home is not a mansion) There was 2 feet between the end of the bed and the wall, one trash can, one chair (for two people), an old tv. Of course we noticed all of this after we unpacked, and we wanted to gamble instead of complain.

    Off we go. and off we lose. Ann found a super jackpot party she wanted to play, so I played something next to her. Grabbed a drink from the drink lady and away we went. Ann finishes playing the jackpot party machine, and wants to look for something else. I see that wheel of fortune machine, the penny one with a $4 max bet that if you hit the bonus, playing max you get 8 spots on the wheel. I knew from experience that if you hit the bonus, your in the money, so I put in $100. I also knew from experience that if you don't hit the bonus, your money goes really fast. I really hate ordering a drink and waiting for it after my money is gone. That was a $100 beer.

    So then we go wandering some more, See the Jaws machine, play the Jaws machine. I've heard the bonus is neat, I wouldn't know.

    Wander around some more, look at the noodle place, I'm a fan of good noodles. Looks like a decent place, we weren't hungry yet, so we wandered some more. Find a 3X, 4X, 5X 5 line $1 machine, like the one at the "pole" at Caesars. So I put in a Hundred. Actually cashed out with $101. I feel better now.:thumbsup:

    Go look at Raffle's cafe menu, thinking I'm going there tomorrow morning for that chicken fried steak and Biscuit's and Gravy I saw pictures of in a previous trip report.

    Ann want's to go to the room for some Tums for me, so of she goes. I stop drinking beer as it's giving me the burn, and switch to 7 and 7's, much better and sit down at some penny machine, big money wheel or something, it's the one with the big drum that spins when you hit the bonus. It didn't spin often enough. So Ann finally shows back up with the Tums, nothing like whiskey and chalk, very tasty. And we go to look for food, or should I say cheap, don't have to be dressed up for, food. We never found that, so we went up and had room service. Ann got the chair, I got the bed.

    Get up the next morning and lounged. I got ready and went down and played a while, losing, and drinking expensive free beer. Ann comes down and we go over to the luxor. Didn't Win. Went to excal, that place still has a smell. Not really sure what it is, but it's there. Didn't play there

    We go to NYNY where I played an old Yukon Gold and Ann played Jackpot party. We didn't win, but I did have a good drink lady. She was fast and came often. That bank of machines ate our lunch while I drank it.

    We go to MGM, planning on going to the m and m store. Play at MGM. Didn't win there, and I really have no idea what we played. The booze service was very good. Head out to go to the M and M store, and Ann says let's go tomorrow. Ok with me, go back to MB. Ann goes up stairs, she's had enough and I go downstairs in search for cheap eats. Actually, I was going to get take out from the house of blues, but it was packed, so I go looking to no avail. Decide, I don't want room service, but I don't want to cab over to In and out either, so I go upstairs to get room service. Walk in and the hotel had rented the suite next door to a couple of parents ( I use that term in protest) with a bunch of animals for children. It sounded like a tornado in their room and ours. Remember when the check in agent said you might be able to smell smoke through the vents? Well, you certainly could hear noise.

    So I'm thinking, if we were at Caesars I'd be having food court fish and chips right now and Ann would be happy with her salad, but nooooo, that's tomorrow night. Then again........Call my host, he's off tonight.....Call back, ask for any host.....Get a guy by the name of James Bean.....Tell him, I'm here, want to be there, will be there tomorrow, get me there tonight. On hold for 2 minutes, and then he says do you want a confirmation number, or not? You don't need one, your good.

    So we throw everything in our bags, while still listening to the storm going on next door, and head out. Go outside and the bellman says "sure hope you enjoyed your stay, have a good flight", get in the cab and he asks "what airline?" We say, Caesars Palace please.

    So we get to CP, walk in to the check in and.........

    Next time, on "Caesar's comes to the rescue"....do we have a room or not? Is it a broom closet or a suite? Does the losing continue? Can man exist on room service alone?
     
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  2. breanna61

    breanna61 Super Moderator

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    A great read so far, you are an entertaining writer. Glad you made an early escape to Caesars; I'm looking forward to the rest of your report!:eek:
     
  3. domeboy

    domeboy VIP Whale

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    I am enjoying the report also, but now I am wondering how it turns out...

    Wait, I just read the title.....All will be fine at the palace....lol
     
  4. jpw711

    jpw711 VIP Whale

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    Ann asks on our way to check in, are you sure we have a room? Did you tip the bellman? I respond, yes, and no, I had to take the bags to him from the cab. We walk into the check in area, and busy it is. I knew that Platinum card was good for something, step to the head of the line and get called immediately..How are you tonight Sir? I'm fine, no wait, I'm not fine at all. What's wrong. I proceed to tell him about the broom closet suite we got at The hotel, and how it was an invited guest offer, and how we have reservations for Wednesday night until Saturday morning and called our host and told him to take us away. He is surprised as says, wow, I have a lot of friends that work there and they are always bragging about how they steal our customers. I say not us. He looks at his screen and says, the type of room you were booked to get via your host for tomorrow isn't available (Augustus Tower) so I'm putting you in the Palace tower tonight (fine with me, less walk to the casino, especially if you get off on the promenade level and take the escalators down) and moving you tomorrow. However, if you want to stay in the Palace tower tomorrow, I'll move you to a suite tomorrow.
    He then tells me to not bother going back over to the hotel tomorrow to check out, just do it over the phone. No Sir, I've got unfinished business in that room (hey next door people, paybacks a bitch, I get up early). He then starts laughing, telling me he knows that MB is sold out, and they could re rent that room that night, and he was going to go call his friends at MB on break and gloat. Cool Guy

    We've stayed in the Palace tower petite suites and really like the two bathrooms, and two headed huge shower, along with the bubble tub, so we so that's cool. So we go up to room 2043 and open it up. It was clean! Ann says, look, we can walk barefoot on the carpet, not like at the Hotel (That carpet was gold 10 years ago, but nice and black now)

    The Palace tower standard rooms are 3 times the size of the Deluxe room on the penthouse floor of The Hotel, and even come with a bubble tub (gasp). I've stayed in both the Palace and Augustus towers and the rooms are pretty much the same. One of these days, I'm gonna stay in the Roman tower, just for kicks.

    We call for the bellman, he's there in 5 minutes, I tell Ann I'm going down to gamble, I owe it to the host for hooking me up for the extra comped night. Oh, I didn't know it was comped was the reply. So I head down to the pole

    First Spin:


    http://www.vegasmessageboard.com/forums/attachment.php?attachmentid=1833&stc=1&d=1258323817

    Now, I don't know if the picture came through, but it's red 7, 2x pay, red 7 for $100. Grab myself a 7 and 7, put it down behind the pole, and continue to play, going up and down for awhile until I put 100 points on the players card ($500 of play), cash out at $180, and go upstairs. I figured that was enough play to keep the host happy for the extra free night, he probably didn't care if I played or not. Ann had already called for room service (salad, quesadias, and wings) so while waiting, I called and thanked the host for helping me out. He actually sounded surprised that I called to say thank you and thanked me for thanking him. The least I could do.

    Room service came, we stuffed, and crashed at midnight.

    Morning came early for me, so I got my fat ass up and took a shower, went down to the cab line at 6:30, it was long, so I got my exercise for the year walking to Bellagio, grabbed a cab there (no line, wonder if that has something to do with being MGM) and went back to The Hotel. Cabby was a very nice lady telling me about this guy in her group that had lung pain and they had traced it to 4 lives, (yes, lives) ago when he took a sword in the chest, and they are trying to get that worked out with energy from rocks and trees. Ok then, good luck with that.

    Went up to my broom closet, cranked up the bose wave radio really loud, and read the free paper. Decided I needed to move the furniture around to make the room look lived in, those beds are heavy, so I got on and gave the headboard a good work out if you know what I mean. Turned down the radio, watched a little Fox news, I must be deaf because I had to turn the tv on really loud to hear it.

    Had enough of that and went down to the players club to see if any of my $1200 and Ann's $400 in loses qualified for taking any of the $45 room service bill (one turkey, one club sandwich) off our bill. No sir, here at the Mandalay Bay, you have to cover your mailed offer before we look at anything else. Have a safe trip back to Missouri. I smiled and said I will, on Saturday.

    Note to self, don't bother taking the Bellagio up on their offer in Jan for the free deluxe room with $300 free play, take the free Standard room from Caesars instead, at least they comp using points.

    So, go back and check out. Told the clerk all about the great people next door. "You should have called security, we could have moved you." (Can you believe that?) I didn't bother to tell her that we moved ourselves last night.

    So, grabbed a cab back to Caesars, I was hoping it was the same lady because I needed some good Karma from the rocks and trees to help with my gambling. But got this nice Hispanic lady and we started talking food. Got a good laugh out of her when I told her about the ground beef enchiladas they have around here. Ann is 1/2 Hispanic, so it's only shredded beef for me. Talked Tamales and how they need more meat and less Masa. Then we ventured off into Cockroaches, not for food, but how nice the desert is not having bugs. That was a nice ride.

    Go back up to the room, Ann's snoring away, so down to the casino I go. Wander off and find a Wizard oz game all the way down in Kansas, I mean this slot machine was as far away from the Place tower as you can get. That machine was very hungry.. oh well. Maybe I just miscalculated how much money I needed to bring, but I'm sure things will turn around. Go find a super red hot penny machine, love the sounds, very annoying to others, crank it up all the way and start playing. It's the one with the roman theme, it let me play for awhile, by this time, I'm ready for food, so I go to the food court and get myself a $15 foot long coney. Good stuff, just forgot to ask for onions.

    It's amazing to me, everything at the food court is $15, or seems that way. It's pretty high quality, well, really, how high of quality can butts and lips (hot dogs) be?

    So, go back to the Pole. It hits again:
    http://www.vegasmessageboard.com/forums/attachment.php?attachmentid=1834&stc=1&d=1258325284

    That's a bar bar 5x with a any bar any bar any bar on top if the picture didn't come thru.

    So the pole is hitting on and off, so I'm playing, decide to go get Ann up and see if our new room is ready. She's up, but not ready, in fact, hasn't even started, says I don't want to start, if the room is ready, makes sense to me. so I pull out my new droid phone (love it) and look to see how close a grocery store is. About 3 years ago, Doritos has a Habanero chilli flavor they discontinued, and we saw toro Habanero Doritos (made in mexico) at MB, so I wanted to cab over they, buy a case, and ups them home. Called Vons, they had them, but alas, never found a cab to take me there.

    So, we again call, and get the room change, up to room 2606, great room, Highly recommend.

    Ann and I go down stairs and go play the hot hot penny machines, the $ machines, and oh yeah, did I mention using the droid phone to find a bank of america atm close to CP? It turns out that right inside of the Forum shops at the casino end, you take the escalators down and there is one right there. Beats paying $5 to use the atms inside the casino. That's the only reason I bank and BOA, there are ATM's everywhere.

    So, I go make a little withdraw, just in case. We go over to the older part of the casino, $ land is what I call it, nice and quiet, except for the people playing WOF, and proceed to get molested by the machines and hammered by the cocktail waitresses. All is good.

    Right next to $ land, and the pole I might add, is a new joint called Beijing Noodle #9.
    We grab some takeout from there, take it up to the room around 9PM. Well, I don't really know where the time went, but I was really amazed that the noodles were packed so well they were still hot @ midnight. And incredible. Really Good.

    Tune in Next time for: Will Joe ever get his Fish and Chips? Has Fat Elvis really lost all that weight? Is the Stripper bus as good as everybody says?
     
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  5. jer0978

    jer0978 Tourist

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    Good report so far. I just wish your last report had come like 5 days earlier.
    I never thought of checking the springfield airport. Its about the same distance as kansas city and i could have booked $39 there and $59 back for my flights instead of $300ish at kc.:cry:
     
  6. Royal Flusher

    Royal Flusher Savvy Gambler

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    Enjoying the trip report a lot!


    More coffee pot info pls. Thx.

    ;)
     
  7. breanna61

    breanna61 Super Moderator

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    I was laughing out loud reading your account of the "payback" at TheHotel......too funny!! Looking forward to the rest of your report!:eek:
     
  8. Pinny Long

    Pinny Long High-Roller

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    Thanks. That's a very helpful tip.

    I hate those dang ATM fees. I always think about how if all I really want is another one or two hundred that that $5 (I think I've paid up to $8 at some shifty places) is not such a small thing, so I'm swayed to pull out way more than I normally would, thinking that if the $5 is spread over $500 that's only 1%.

    Plus, the only thing worse than paying $5 to take your own money is paying it AGAIN 10 minutes later.
     
  9. jpw711

    jpw711 VIP Whale

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    more trip report later, no coffee pot in any room, we brought our own. Of course, we didn't bring filters. Paper towels worked in a pinch.
     
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  10. Gino

    Gino "The King of Inappropriate."

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    Good read...Thanks
     
  11. fastlaney

    fastlaney Low-Roller

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    :beer:

    I'm loving your trip report! Can't wait for the next installment!
     
  12. gmoney590

    gmoney590 VIP Whale

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    So The Hotel puts you in a broom closet and tells you you can't smoke because it may disturb other guests but they'll put crazed children in the suite next to you. Figures. When you went back did you smoke and blow it into the vents?
    I'm definetly enjoying your report.
     
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  13. jpw711

    jpw711 VIP Whale

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    Thursday, the second to the last day, wow, those last 2 full days went fast.

    We wake up about 7 am, the weatherman said it was going to be windy, we left the little vent in the window open, he was right. Those palm trees down there were really shaking. So we lounge around in the room, watching the news, and the other daytime stupidity that is on.

    I roll down to the casino around 11. Typical start, at a penny machine. I prefer to hit the $'s in the evening, for some reason I don't think I'm going to lose as much at a penny machine playing max bet. Stupid me, those pennies just suck the money up. Go play the red hot penny machine, no good, wander over to the big new fishing machine, play some biker pig game, that game moves fast, and sucks up money quicker. Never did get the fishing big event..Rats. Went back up to the room to check on Ann's status. She's having a bad hair day, or she's saying her hair won't work with her. So I head back down, go to the Pole. It's at least letting me play. Ann finally shows up around two, we have some discussion about going to a local mex rest @ 8:30, if we are still in the mood. So off to the forum casino, Ann wants to play a super jackpot party. I go play some sort of quarter reel machine. A little play, not much, so I go set down at the Jade Monkey game next to her. She's partying like it's 1999, I'm playing $1 per spin (not max) and finally hit the bonus. That paid good.

    Go outside to check on the wind, it's calm, so, remembering that Bally's makes stiff drinks, we wander that way. Walk into Bills, to see if Fat Elvis had really lost all the weight that the Cabby told us about in July. So the show is now called Big Elvis. He's still big, but not as much. Looks like he's lost a couple of hundred, I'm impressed.

    Go to Ballys, I sit down at a $ top $, hit the top $ twice real quick, Ann comes over, says she's ordered me a drink and to come over when done. I'm done, go over, grab a drink, she's playing some type of new slingo multi game machine. Having a good time, I go back over to the $'s, sit down on another top $, and proceed to hit 3 more top $'s. Good times, even though the offers were for $20 or $30. I want the Thousand! Got it 4 trips ago, and it remembered.

    Decide to go to Paris. Play the duck machines (quack quack quack bonus). Lost that 100 with no drink. Wander over the the front, see a drink lady, order, and head to the toilet. Wow, I was really...........DISGUSTED. I've never seen a facility nastier that that toilet area. I mean, piles of TP in the stalls, no urinal dividers (hey, I don't want your junk seeing my junk) and just general filth. Remember, I'm a guy and this shouldn't bother me. Checked the door on the way out to make sure I hadn't gone into the womens instead. Ann always says that Women can really trash bathrooms, not flush, etc. Who would have thunk it?

    So we finally get our drinks, and go outside to watch the fountains. They were ok, but the dude getting busted right in front of us was a much better show. Don't know what he did, but he had trouble with a Capital T. Wander back over to CP and I go rub the pole

    I guess I should explain. This particular machine has a building column just to the left of it, there is no machine behind it as this would be blocked by the column, so there is plenty of space. Besides, the machine directly to the right is a 9 line $, so not many people play it. In fact, I've only seen one person play that machine in the 3 years I've been hitting my machine up for money, and that guy was me. So I proceed to play with my pole, this time I was rewarded with this:

    http://www.vegasmessageboard.com/forums/attachment.php?attachmentid=1835&stc=1&d=1258341712

    So Ann says she is losing her butt, she is going up to the room for some hot tub action. I say, have fun, I'll be there sooner or later, guess we are not going to the Mexican place.

    So I play some more in $ land, some WOF (3rd spin, got the wheel, got $100), and more pole. I like that machine, obviously. It seems to give a lot of hits where I get my $5 back, so I look at those as refunds. I've can usually put 100 tier credits (100 spins) on a $100 investment. Sometimes I actually hit something meaty. If anybody want's the exact location at CP, send me a PM and I'll clue you in. All the while I'm playing this machine, my favorite drink lady keeps bringing me two 7 and 7's at a time.

    So, sometime or another, I wander up to the room, with 3 drinks in my hand. That's a trick, took the escalator short cut from Payards chocolate joint to the convention floor, a short stumble to the elevator and up to the 26th floor I ride. Get in the room, Ann's having hot tub fun, yells order rooms service, so we have salad, quesadias, and the pasta bolgnaese with sauasage. Good Stuff.

    I move from eating to stretching out on the bed, last thing I remember was Ann saying get naked and under the covers before passing out. I complied and the next thing I knew it's Friday. I wake up really surprised because I went from drinking heavily to only drinking in Vegas, and woke up hangover free. :thumbsup:

    So Ann wakes up, says I haven't heard you snore like that since you quit drinking and went back to sleep with strict orders to drink water today:nono:


    I take a shower, Ann wakes up, informs me she's not feeling well, and to have a great day. Last full Day in Las Vegas without my wife, oh what shall I do?:wave:

    Next up.....Great Gift Wrapup, the Orleans, and other fun stuff.
     
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  14. Thor

    Thor Beer Drinker

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    sounds like you got some action....and not just at the pole....or actually....the pole brought you actions of all types!!! :beer::beer::beer:
     
  15. BeeeJay

    BeeeJay President of The Red Lobster Hostess Satisfaction

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    great report---lots of gambling and drinking. I stayed once at a Harrah's property ever, Caesars, in the Palace tower, just the basic room, but I loved that jetted tub and big bathroom. Stayed twice at Mandalay Bay and really like the rooms (media suite and sky suite), but everything else about Mandalay Bay sucked, the bitchy workers and boring casino especially. great drink service at Caesars, albeit from ladies who peaked in the '60's.
     
  16. Mowsee

    Mowsee Low-Roller

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    :haha:

    Great TR, looking forward to more!
     
  17. jpw711

    jpw711 VIP Whale

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    As I last left you, I was planning a day without my lady, first stop, nice and greasy fish and chips from the food court @ CP. I make it down there right at 11AM, the cook is there, but nobody to take my order. So I decide I'll wander of to the planet version of the super red hot pennies. I play there for 15 minutes, losing $40, and wander back over there. Still no order taker, I yell at the cook, are you open? She replies, I'm ready, so I go to the next station, where I know I can order anything in the food court, one stop shopping! I tell the clerk what I want, and she tells me to go over there and order it. So I tell her I would, but, and you can take my order here, so just do it. She takes my order, and I stiff her on the tip, because she was just being lazy.

    Listen up people, I tip, but only for service, not good service, any kind of service. I don't need to tell you how your job should be done or get a lecture, I'm the customer, I'm right. If I'm gonna do that, get out of my way, I'll ring up my order myself and take the employee discount. Rant over.

    So, go back to the fish and chips station to wait for my hot fish, and there she is, taking orders. WTF, where were you 1 minutes ago?

    Get my order, and they must not have cocktail sauce, shrimp sauce, or any kind of sauce besides Tartar Sauce in Mexico. I finally come up with the right phrase: Red Sauce, and bingo, I get cocktail sauce.

    So I eat my tasty fish, and wander back into the casino with a full Pepsi. Now I know what your thinking, and your thinking wrong. I take the Pepsi up to my ailing wife and give it to her, then head over to Harrahs for the great gift wrap up. I had a paltry 30000 gift points, and I was getting something for my massive losses. My wife had 15K more, and I was hoping to combine them, but no luck, seeing as she was sick. So, I cross over, fighting the urge to grab every porn ad from every Mexican on the strip. I'm amazed at how they have that porn snap/flick down. Don't even have the usual urge to swear at Jimmy Buffet's dive as I walk by (4 years ago, we were told we were to drunk to be served. Please, all we did was ask what kind of Tequilas they had, we drank for another 5 hours after that, and woke up hangover free I might add).

    So, I wander through the carnival court, where everybody was screaming, hey come here. They must not have been talking to me, since I didn't go over there.

    Find the great gift whatever and walk in, knowing that I was going to get that Tempurpedic bed for our guest room to go with the one in our Master. Only 265K points or something like that. So I look at the Dysan Vac's, that handheld looks really nice. Only 65K points, not that. Wow, that's a nice Bamboo Cutting board, but I'm not spending my points on that, I can go out and buy a piece of plywood and stain/seal it myself for $10, and it gives me something to do while dreaming of being back in Vegas having a cold drink.

    Aha! There's the cusinart section. I ponder going over and telling people don't buy the blender, it sucks, but I don't. Finally, I find a double wide blender by Hamilton beach...Pick that for my wife, so I don't have to hear about the Cusinart piece of sh*t not being strong enough to grind up chilli peppers, and then do quick subtraction in my head (passed up the loaner calculator) and found that I still had enough points for a Personal groomer. Fun times ahead! :evillaugh And it's even the same brand as the broken one that my wife likes. SCORE:thumbsup:

    So, I wander back into Harrahs, not a big fan of the casino. Always seems crowded with no room, and sit down at some penny machine with 7's going up in the form of Jacobs Ladder. Hit the bonus, it went up 4 tiers, not good enough, but better that what has been happening. Order a Corona, betting that the server will bring me a lime, even though I say Corona with lemon, Not a lime, toss in some salt and that's a good beer. She brings me a lime, which I toss into the ashtray. Cash out, wander over and find some new game. What's that, a new game at a Harrahs property, I'm shocked. Play it, no good.

    So I take my naked Corona and go over to the IP. The IP was the first casino Hotel I ever stayed in, I guess you could say I lost my virginity there, and it wasn't that great. The room was pea soup green, and that's not a good thing to wake up to. But it's a dive, and a few of those impersonator dealers could be considered on the hot side, depending on how many "waters" I had drank.

    Wander back to that stupid WOF penny Machine, with the 8 slices on the wheel. At least this time I stopped at a $80 loss, instead of the full $100. By this time, I'm having a hard time getting my mojo going, guess I missed my wife, but I shook that off and wandered to the back of the IP. Found a new 3 reel fishing game, if you go fishing, the bonus gives you 7 or 8 spins, in which all three reels have to have lures, to actually go fishing. The drink lady shows up, I order, and when she brings my drink, yep, a lime. But she Remembered (!) and went back for the lemon. So I hit the bonus right off, without max coin in, and go fishing, think I hit for $30 so I bump it up and play, and play, and play, and finally go fishing again. Didn't get a bite.

    So I blow the IP off, and wander outside. I never can find a drink or good service at Flamingo, so I take the short way back to CP and cross the street at the light. Go up to the room, drop my receipt for my personal groomer and double wide off, wake Ann up and say I'm going to the Orleans.

    Be careful is the reply, so your only drinking beer right? Hey, she forgot about the water!

    Again, the cab line is long, so I find myself at Bills gambling hall, were apparently, they don't have a cab pickup point, only drop off. Three youngsters get out, I get in and ask if it's ok, cabby say's sure, but I'm putting down I picked you up at the Westin.

    Now I'm no expert in navigation from Bills to the Orleans, but if I was going to do it, I'd go straight down Flamingo, past the Rio and turn left. Not this guy, we took the Tunnel.....just kidding, but we did take I-15, right past in and out burger. I thought about it, but those fish and chips were still swimming around, so I passed.

    We passed city center, and the cabby was telling me how condos were selling for 650K last year and now selling for 300K and the people who bought at 650K are pissed. I bet they are. Don't know about you guys, but $650K buys a mansion here in Southwest Missouri, hell, it buys two mansions here, and I tell the guy so. Then he says, if I have 650K, I'm buying a house. Smart man.

    So I make it into the Orleans, cab fare wasn't out of line, and go get myself a replacement card, after I fought my way past the paycheck cashing line and the Western Union line. Get my card and take a walk around. Lots and Lots of VP, find a Texas Tea penny machine and play max bet. All of 45 cents. The machine is screaming at me, win up to 6000 coins! Hey, that's 60 bucks, so what's the point. I go find the $'s. Get a beer and play, notice I'm not posting any pictures here.

    Go find some other super red hot penny thing, it never bonuses, so I head out of there after an hour or so. Grab a cab back to CP, he goes the way I figured I'd come to the Orleans, nice guy, but the state should have taken is DL away when he hit 90. (years)

    I have him drop me at the Augustus tower entrance to save $20 in cab fare sitting at traffic lights, and call Ann to see if she is better. It's the last day, and I wanted to see if she was able to come down and play. Nope, so I go to the pole. Drop 180 there real quick, to quick, about 5 minutes quick. I didn't even have time to order a drink to sit and wait for. So I wander up to the front entrance and find that same fishing machine. Plop in the 20 left on the ticket, hit max bet, and hit the bonus. Win $180 on that bonus, so I took that ticket and ran, all the way back to the pole, no I didn't, I went to the other end and played Monopoly big event. Actually hit the big event, and won a little. Was headed back to the pole, but remembered that my favorite drink lady said she was going to be by the food court, so I sat down at a goldfish game, never played it, so I thought, I'll give it a try.

    I put $40 and play for awhile, $1.50 per spin. Hit a few bonuses and get a feel for the game. I made sure I placed myself on the aisle, as there was a third eye blind concert that evening, and if the girls going to this concert wore skirts any shorter, they would be going up from the waist line instead of down. Man o Man, where were these girls when I was in High school in the early 80's?

    So, I'm enjoying the view, the game, but no cocktail.....She shows up, asks if I want a 7 and 7, and where is Ann? I tell her, she disappears and shows up with 2, doubles no less.

    A nice 4th generation blond California girl sits down next to me, tells me she's a non drinker, with a glass of wine in her hand. Ok, if you think that, Monica didn't have sex with Bill either. Anyway, she puts a ticket with $300 in the goldfish machine, and I watch her run this thing up to 700, then 800, so I bump my bet up to max. I play for a long time, 3 more times of two drink deliveries, and than nature calls. So I cash out, say my goodbyes to the non drinking wino, and go do my business. Come back and sit down on the other aisle two seats to the left. Hit this:

    http://www.vegasmessageboard.com/forums/attachment.php?attachmentid=1836&stc=1&d=1258407467

    That helped, the next thing I knew, the machine was hitting a bonus every 3 spins. Amazing. This went on for 400 Tier credits, then it turned off.

    By this time, I'm hammered, and thinking, if Ann is still sick tomorrow morning, I'm going to have to pack, and I hate to pack. It's 9 PM, so I go back to the pole. The pole turned into the shaft. A quick 300 later, I was off to get some more Noodles. Good stuff again, though I have to wonder when the lady asked how I was doing that evening, I said losing. She replied glad to hear it....hmmm, you speaky no inglish?

    So take my noodles and the escalator express up to the 26th floor and stumble in around 10. I woke up Ann, asked if she wanted me to get her some food, and devoured the noodles, set the alarm for 5AM, telling myself one of these days, I'm going to tell Ann all the early flights are sold out and go to be.

    Coming up next: Early morning fun, TSA, Will HET comp, and the wrap up.
     
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  18. Thor

    Thor Beer Drinker

    Joined:
    Apr 3, 2008
    Messages:
    2,081
    Location:
    TEXAS
    Trips to Las Vegas:
    8
    sounds like you're a penny expert...question...do you know how or when you win or do you just wait for the lights and sounds??? i've never been able to figure those penny machines out! :beer::beer::beer:
     
  19. jpw711

    jpw711 VIP Whale

    Joined:
    Mar 10, 2009
    Messages:
    1,550
    Location:
    Southwest Missouri
    Trips to Las Vegas:
    50
    I pretty much figure it out after awhile, when it comes to how I win. Some of those new games though, there ain't no way.
     
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  20. breanna61

    breanna61 Super Moderator

    Joined:
    Aug 6, 2008
    Messages:
    5,899
    Location:
    Ontario, Canada
    Trips to Las Vegas:
    106
    I'm sad that your trip is coming to an end as I'm really enjoying your TR! You don't have to check the door to determine if you entered the ladies room.....we don't have those "drinking fountains" in the ladies room. I clued into that when I barged into the men's room at Luxor once - Tut looks a lot like Cleopatra when you are three sheets to the wind!

    Looking forward to the rest of your report; you have a great witty writing style!
    :eek:
     
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