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I Am Spending The Weekend In Las Vegas, NV (9/25 - 9/28)

Discussion in 'Vegas Trip Reports' started by tdhoier, Sep 24, 2015.

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  1. tdhoier

    tdhoier Low-Roller

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    My Trip Report

  2. tdhoier

    tdhoier Low-Roller

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    It was divine intervention the likes I had not seen.

    Not a religious man, I finally realized there must be a greater power amongst us. This Chris Robinson looking bearded wonder in the sky has clearly set a path for this guy, right here…and right now.

    The fact this all coincides with Pope Francis, the Argentinian Archangel, visiting our great land makes me a believer.

    I could hear the Lords words as I read the email informing me I would need to make a sudden, unexpected trip to Los Angeles, “Child, you will go-eth to the West, where you shall display the fruits of your labor…perhapseth you may even visit the temple in the dry land.”

    In English, a very random, work-related situation arose two weeks ago where I need to be in L.A. on Monday the 28th.

    I bought my flight to LAX and immediately decided I would head east on I-15 upon landing with a very high-end, luxurious and chic rental car to show the Nevada Gaming Commission I mean business and am a force to be reckoned with (It’s a Ford Fusion or similar).

    Why fly across the country and stay in CA when Princess Clark County is 240 miles away? That’s like having a beautiful nympho lying atop your Serta mattress and asking her if she’d like to watch the Family Feud, folks.

    It was a no-brainer.

    I hadn’t planned on returning until my annual Super Bowl trek…now I need to make the most out of this opportunity bestowed upon me.

    It all makes me think of one of my favorite quotes from Saint Vincent Lombardi (God of American Football and the Diety of Knowledge): “I firmly believe that any man’s finest hour, the greatest fulfillment of all that he holds dear, is the moment when he has worked his heart out in a good cause and lies exhausted on the field of battle – victorious.”

    “Worked his heart out in a good cause” is a metaphor for “Gambled and drank in excess in hopes of profit and to visit a strip club.”

    “Lies exhausted on the field of battle” is a metaphor for “Passed out in the bushes along Las Vegas Blvd in front of Caesars Palace.”

    “Victorious” equals either “Unconscious” or, just maybe, ”TRIUMPHANT” ??
     
  3. Electroguy563

    Electroguy563 Over-Fried Gambler

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    I like your writing style. Good luck, have a blast, and try not to spend too much time in those bushes....:wink2:
     
    Going to Hawaii's 9th Island!!
    Going to Hawaii's 9th island!!
  4. StingerHook

    StingerHook Low-Roller

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    Have an awesome trip!
     
  5. Dutch34

    Dutch34 Low-Roller

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    We've all won just reading that opening. Seriously, how can you lose after that? Win one for the gipper!
     
  6. tdhoier

    tdhoier Low-Roller

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    From the Terminal at O'Hare International Airport that really started the Golden Age of Cinema.

    A scene and a film none of us can or will ever forget.

    The family races to their gate in a last ditch attempt to get to Paris.

    A little movie they called 'Home Alone', folks. uploadfromtaptalk1443188659892.jpg
     
  7. vegasvette

    vegasvette Low-Roller

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    TD:
    Best of luck on your pilgrimage. May you findeth a Truimph, or even better, win a Harley.
     
  8. bshowell

    bshowell VIP Whale

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    Lol this is fun and I appreciate that Home Alone reference
     
  9. MertyNewJersey

    MertyNewJersey Tourist

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    This sounds like its going to be 1 "hum-dinger" of a TR!!! You can pick your own metaphor (or meet-a-whore)...:poke:
     
  10. TimLion

    TimLion Low-Roller

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    Subscribed!

    Make me proud...

    Santé,
    TL
     
  11. breanna61

    breanna61 Super Moderator

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    I'm right behind you leaving on Sunday! Enjoy!
     
  12. tdhoier

    tdhoier Low-Roller

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    This has been a long ass day and Im still 70 miles out.
    -Canyonlands National Park
    -Los Angeles
    -A big ass rock in the high desert off I 15 uploadfromtaptalk1443223407089.jpg uploadfromtaptalk1443223454178.jpg uploadfromtaptalk1443223499486.jpg

    I'll be home in an hour sweethearts!
     
  13. Richard Alpert

    Richard Alpert LOST

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    The beautiful nympho lying atop my Serta mattress actually prefers "Deal or No Deal." She has a "thing" for Howie Mandel...

    Awesome start to a TR! I'm hooked! Looking forward to seeing what comes after the big ass rock!
    -Richard
     
  14. tdhoier

    tdhoier Low-Roller

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    Much to update, but Mary and Anu couldn't be more ridiculous (and they deal cards, although they sound like they could come to your room with a quick call)

    God damnit
     
  15. tdhoier

    tdhoier Low-Roller

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    I feel like Luke Skywalker's when he done up and quit on the Jedi Master Yoda over yonder in the Dagobah System. Here he was trying to learn the ways of the Force and he ups and leaves in the middle of his training because he had a vision of Han Solo and Princess Leia being sodomized in the cloud city.

    Well folks, I know how the young apprentice felt as I had abandoned this Trip Report yesterday.

    It was such a long day traveling from the Shenandoah to this Mecca that I left all responsibility behind once I checked into the Vdara and had three quick vodka 7's.

    I like to elaborate on the adventures, but I was hoppin' along the Strip like Frogger from spot to spot. I left $1400 in the safe and took $650 out with me (thinking that I'd just go out for a wee bit and get some shut-eye for the college football betting bonanza I'm putting myself through today).

    I pinballed my way back into the panoramic suite at 4 AM with $470 in my designer jeans, so a success (in my book).

    Blackjack and Pai Gow were the games of choice last night. I met people from all walks of life (some extremely big breasted, others flat as Texas Toast). I even met a gorgeous Jewish maiden from Israel. I just couldn't contain my love and told her, "I think you Is-Rael pretty, girl!"

    Come 11 PM I had to mosey on over to one of my favorite little spots off-Strip....the Double Down Saloon to catch some punk rock and drink some ass juice. Trust me when I say it didn't disappoint. My eardrums are still bleeding from the two bands that played.

    I'll try to be better today as I'm sure everyone who has viewed this thread has set their alarms to find out what can possibly happen next. It won't be too crazy early as I am going to try to emulate my last trip in early August by single-handedly demolishing the Aria Sports Book.

    The Oracle of NCAA Football has arrived, Las Vegas. Hide the women and shelter the young'uns.

    ** The only negative from last night is that I did not have time to visit my shorties from the 702 down at the Palomino Club...another failure of mine. I have to find the time to get over there and see how the ladies have been from my seven week hiatus.
     
  16. tdhoier

    tdhoier Low-Roller

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  17. tdhoier

    tdhoier Low-Roller

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  18. win4me

    win4me Low-Roller

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    Enjoying your TR!
     
  19. Jer

    Jer VIP Whale

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    This cracks me up... I need more!
     
  20. Royal Flusher

    Royal Flusher Savvy Gambler

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    I often listen to the Double Down Saloon internet radio station on Tune-in on my television.

    I think this make me pretty bad-ass roughrider.
     
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