So, I'm minding my own business walking out to the mailbox and see the newly crowned HOA Dictator sweeping up pine cones and those spiky seed pods in the public area. I asked him how was doing, as I always do to everyone because I am a nice guy. He proceeds to deliver a sarcasm laden, condescending diatribe about how he needs help. I try to take another route back to my house but I get waylaid by him using a very provocative tone telling me how much he needs help. I went into my house and got stuck thinking about this crap. He had posted these crudely written notes, held up with masking tape on the mailboxes, declaring that he wanted new members and he wanted them in his kitchen at a certain date and time so he could hand out assignments. In the note he further declared that it was he who removed the leaf dams from the creek behind his property, thus removing standing water, further thusly solving the mosquito problem. I removed the notes from the mailboxes, rolled them up in a ball and threw them on his lawn. Whaddya know? An hour later he's knocking on my door demanding to know why I vandalized his notes and that he was calling the police. Now, I'm pretty sure that the county deputies have other things to do on a Saturday than to chase down the Note Destroyer. I told him, "Look, nobody gives two shits about your HOA freakshow, so get lost. He gets right in my face and demands to know what I have done since he has known me to help the community. I told him that I am 67 years old, I have atherosclerosis, I have fainting spells (which he damn well knows about) and I am not about to waste my time raking up pine cones and seed pods. Further than that, I pay my dues on time ($88/month) and I don't break any of the rules. There are approximately 60 some homes in this community, which includes lots of absentee owners who rent out to the military. Are you telling me that with all of these young bucks and their wives running around that it's on me to address the pine cone problem? Eff him and the HOA.