Monday October 5th was overcast in Houston but as my girlfriend and I boarded a Southwest Airlines plane I knew things would all be better soon. I have spent 8 months learning about Vegas through various resources (most notably this website). I wondered if it would be a letdown or if I already knew to much and my trip would be ruined, little did I know that a few short days would spawn a love affair. We landed in Vegas around 4:30 local time, the flight was perfect and sitting at the window I watched the beauty of the Southwestern United States fly by. As we got off the plane I was a little surprised how dark and bland McCarron was, silly me I was expecting more from an airport terminal. As we took a cab to The Flamingo I was like a kid in a candy store, I didn't know what to do, I was in heaven. There was a long line to check-in but my girlfriend and I waited patiently, we were only standing around 20 or so minutes when I was up. The desk person was a very nice lady (I forgot her name but her badge said she was Employee of the Month in April), they had me booked in a deluxe room and I asked her if any complimentary upgrades were available, all the while I had a $20 in sight. She gave me a couple of Go Rooms as options but mentioned that she had a corner room looking directly at Caesars and a great view of the Bellagio Fountains!!!!!! BINGO!!!! Room 11064 was awesome, clean and spacious with a comfy king bed, pillows that were soft and yielding like a nerf ball, and showerhead that could remove a layer of skin. We both loved the room and loved the view, it was a million dollar view, the $20 trick is a good thing my friends. After unpacking we went to explore Caesars and The Forum Shops, the place is huge, I didn't know where to go next. Walking The Forum Shops my girlfriend was getting a blister of her toes from her wedges. She was also getting tired, I found it cute. She's an ex-model who weighs maybe 120 and is about 5'8" and my fat-ass was having no problems with the long walk. After she whined a little we went back to The Flamingo and had dinner at The Burger Joint. This was good stuff, I loved it and espically enjoyed my pesto bun. My girlfriend liked her burger but didn't think it was anything special. After dinner we walked around outside and looked at the wildlife and strolled to the Bugsy Memorial. Kind of spooky up there, then we were off to bed. Tuesday morning I was up early and decided to hit the ground running, around 7am I took off towards the south end of the strip, pornslapper galore made me laugh bright and early. I walked all the way down the MGM before going in there, I wandered this huge place in awe of it's size. I found the Monorail and purchased 2, 3 day passes, best money you can ever spend on the strip! I got off at Ballys and made my way to that little piece of heaven called Ellis Island. What a great salad, perfect steak, great potato, and nice green beans! From here I made my way back to The Flamingo and stopped along the way for Coke, Sprite, and Crown. My only major gripe with Vegas is that it takes an act of God to get a Coke product. Around 11 we hit the city and headed north. My girlfriends only other trip she stayed at Imperial Palace and had little positive to say, just walking by I didn't think much of the place. I liked O'Sheas and the little guy with the great voice barking to the crowds. Harrah's Carnival Court did little for me, but I like Casino Royale, it seemed fun and unpretentious, my kind of place. Of course next up we made it to The Venetian, wowsers. I got a kick out of the moving sidewalks that went up and down, I guess it's true, the best things in life really are free. We had thought about check out Madame Toussads but decided against it after seeing the poor depiction of The Rock outside. We window shopped at The Canal Shoppes and The Palazzo, beautiful places. Next we checked out The Wynn, gorgeous. While using a stall there I updated my Facebook status mentioning it was the best stall I'd ever used. Being a golf pro we went and looked out and saw the course, I was unimpressed simply because it was so contrived, I like natural courses, but hey, that's just me. Next we walked over to Encore, also very nice, it's hard to say anything bad about either property. After hitting Encore we went across the street to Fashion Show, we were hungry and wanted a drink. We went to Maggianos, I had never been to the one 20 minutes from my house but visited one 1200 miles away, nice going. We had appeteizers, I had the sausage and peppers and she had the calimari. Both were very good and our cocktails were top notch. After lunch my girlfriend was tired but I convinced her to head north, we visited Riveria (unimpressed), Circus Circus (made me want to hang myself), had a tasty rita from Slot O' Fun, and then went to Sahara. That along with all the booming construction (wink, wink) on the north end of the strip was kind of depressing. From Sahara we took the Monorail back to The Flamingo. It was around 4ish and we decided to hang out in the room for a little (by we I mean I was going to let my girlfriend make this call). We watched some CSI, I'd never seen it before and her head started to hurt. She wasn't real big on visting Freemont Street so we agreed that I'd go there that night while she rested at the hotel. I went to the Walgreens across from Monte Carlo to get some supples (fun walk) and then ordered her dinner from room services. I didn't expect much but her T-Bone was fantastic, it was pretty big so she let me finish it. Around 8 I head to the Monorail and went to The Hilton, from there I took a cab to The Golden Nugget and hit Freemont Street. My first goal was the steak and lobster special at Tony Roma's. There was a 30 minute wait to get in so I played slots. Once I got in I dined on one of the worst steaks I've ever had and a decent but small lobster tail. Of course what should I expect for a such a great price? Now it was time to walk FSE. It was not near as crowded as I expected and not as pretty as the pictures make you believe. Well I got going walking a little to far and in the distance I saw the hell hole of Las Vegas casinos, the place where even the degenerates think you have a gambling problem, The Western! I think the easiest thing to say is that The Western sucks, I played blackjack with a crazy old blackman who cussed me everytime I won a hand and he lost. At the table next to us was a chinese guy who wanted to be treated like he was playing $500 hands at Bellagio. On the plus side I won a little money and the drink service was good. At the end of the day that's all I really want out of a casino. So I walked back towards FSE and passed El Cortez, I will take yalls word for it being a cool place but the backside of it looked like hell. Now I was going up the street towards Plaza when I stopped in front of Binions to the watch the overhead show. A nice enough, kinda cute girl started talking to me about the show. I really didn't think much of it, I'm from Texas, we talk to strangers here. Anyway she told me I was kind of cute and asked me if I had any plans. I told her that my girlfriend was waiting for me back on the strip but since she was by herself she could tag along FSE with me. Again, I'm a friendly guy and in Texas we make friend with strangers. At this point she told me that it wouldn't work that she was working. Well I being an idiot and being in front of Binions said, "Oh what do you do for Binions?" She then told me that her name was Nicki and she was a hooker, I felt like a dumbass. At this point she was getting a little more aggressive telling me her life story, then came one of the lines of the trip. I told Nicki that my parents have a mutt named Nicki that's a great dog (they really do). She got pissed and left while telling me she was the best piece of ass I could have ever had. After this I went up to The Plaza and went upstairs to see Firefly and check out the view. While there I updated my Facebook status with my hooker story. At this point I went and saw MSS and the Berlin Wall urinal, I liked the theme in the casino and headed back to Golden Nugget. From there I grabbed a cab to Stratosphere . The cabbie was an older Indian guy who was very chatting, he told me going to Strat around midnight was a waste of time, and offered to take my to a strip club, a good place to get hookers, or a guy who could hook me up with some dope. I told him thanks anyway and laughed. I am afraid of heights, I don't like standing by the rail at our 3rd story apartment so getting up The Stat was a big deal for me and what a great view! After seeing the Strat I walked back down to Sahara and took the Monorail back to Flamingo. I was pushing 2am but decided to go to O'Sheas. There I played War and had some nice success, won a little money and then went and played some slots at Flamingo before bed. I was tired and there was still plenty left to come!